I have a very important question and I can't seem to get conclusive answer

[planetcloud]

When a man does a pee does he wiggle he end so to speak or dab with toilet paper? The only reason I ask is that with four "men" in the house the use of toilet paper seems to be extremely high. I always thought men wiggled but it appears I may have been wrong all this time. Clarification would be much appreciated.

I marked the loo roll very discreetly, & confirm that DH is a wiggler. He never makes a mess.

I should get out more.....

My everloving DH either wiggles or dribbles. He doesn't dab. He uses about half a roll of paper when he needs to use paper though, I reckon.

The boys dab. And use less paper when needed.

When the Great Bog Roll shortage was ongoing, we went through a LOT less toilet paper as I told them all that they were allowed an absolute maximum of 3 sheets each time. Now toilet paper is back in supermarkets properly, usage seems to have gone up again, which is a shame because it didn't need to!

Yes, it hangs down. Thinking about it, when ds was little he had to point his willy down or it fired out straight in front of the potty/toilet, but for dh it hangs down and he jokes about half of it getting wet .

Getoff That's really sweet, there is no mystery left in my marriage.

DH is a wiggler.
Honestly find the fact that most men wiggle and don’t dab after a wee utterly revolting.
I just try not to think about it 🤢

Now here's another matter. I keep the toilet rolls in a basket next to the toilet - long given up with the toilet roll holder. They literally start 10 different rolls at a time - it's weird - there are bits of rolls all over the basket. Someone explain that then!

As a bloke, i dab, if i wiggle i seek to make more of a mess and end up using more toilet roll 😂😂

I haven't wiggled since I was about 14. Since then it's been more like thrashing the life out of a boa constrictor. Alright, alright, I'm still a wiggler. The wife and I have seperate bathrooms though so should there be any collateral splashage it is my responsibility.

You don't get toilet paper beside the urinals in gents toilets BTW so if there are any dabbers they must struggle when away from home, unless they carry a secret supply of willy wipes.

@EthelMayFergus haha, your post reminded me of helping Mr 3 (then Mr 2) go to the loo the other day. Somehow his penis ended up facing the wrong way, first he peed all over the front of the toilet then it sprang up and got all over me (standing in front of him), then as I squealed a little and jumped out of the way he managed to fire his pee all up and down the wall.... all while laughing his little head off in hysterics about the mess he was accidently making haha.

P.S He is otherwise a dabber to stop pee getting everywhere hah.

DH shakes the end, then rinses it under the bathroom basin tap, then dries with his own hand towel.
Squeaky clean knob in this house!

I bet you make him wash it in a beaker after sex?

To add to the great dab and wiggle conundrum, some men don't do either, some men pee,and then just put the offending appendage straight back without doing anything. It might mean a slight wet patch on clothes, but some men do not care about this.

There's an old German saying:

Da hilft kein Schütteln und kein Klopfen,
in die Hose geht der letzte Tropfen

It roughly translates as "No matter how you shake and hit, in your trousers always goes the last bit" - sounds much better in German

DH shakes the end, then rinses it under the bathroom basin tap, then dries with his own hand towel.

As you spectate, does he reassure you with "Madam, it is but the work of a moment!"

Would a specially-hypothecated flannel not be better than wiping his todger on the hand towel, though?

The DH who is able to rinse his knob in the sink must either be really tall or be hung like a donkey, no?

Or have a dick like a slinky

I wonder if there are any chaps out there who keep a length of pipe in the bathroom for the purpose of safe and efficient carriage of the wee from source to destination without splashage?

That's what we do when filling the Aquaroll at caravan sites - although I'm sure there are plenty of boastful men out there who would prefer to make the comparison with those fun-looking slides waste chutes that builders run from the top of the scaffolding down to the skip

Probably one of those tiny little vanity sinks that you can only fit one hand in at a time.

Not so much 'he stoops and conquers' as 'position yourself and careful of the conkers'

I'm told "willie-prints" are a thing.

I didn't enquire further, but I suspect this art-form may explain the rapid depletion of toilet roll when certain male members of the family are around and I don't expect Christies will be auctioning the results in the future.

I wouldn't know wether DH shakes or dabs, i have never been i the toilet when he uses it.

My DH sits down and he dabs. I only learnt this late last year... even after 15 years he’s still full of surprises

Get them a penis beaker 🤣🤣🤣

planetcloud

Now here's another matter. I keep the toilet rolls in a basket next to the toilet - long given up with the toilet roll holder. They literally start 10 different rolls at a time - it's weird - there are bits of rolls all over the basket. Someone explain that then!

🙄FFS.
Change the way they are stored, that's bound to happen, are you serious 🤔

Some men can't sit down to wee because their parts hang in the water.

Some men can't sit down to wee because their parts hang in the water.

Some men lie about how big their cocks are.
Look at the water level. There is no way anyone’s dick is touching that (assuming you are in the UK. I find the high water level in America disturbing)

Boy 1 dabs. Boy 2 sits. Man wiggles. I have taken to using one of those piss mats in the downstairs loo now he is home all day. Animal.
They wipe their arses with a roll a day though.

It’s not the peeing op that uses the loo roll, it’s the massive shits. Sorry but it is.

I encourage my OH to sit to wee for a few reasons I don't want to bring up (bot envy).

He has been known to dab on occasion, but in our home it's actually my kids who seem to eat up the bog roll. No, they're not boys.

But yes, I've had the unfortunate experience of being in the same room (you know how emergency bog trips can be when someone else is in the shower or bath) and I've seen grown men using a LOT of poop paper.

@NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace I practised at home, in the shower, over a decade ago I think, and it was all time, thought I had the knack. Turns out that when you're at a festival and have had some drink, you're more likely to piss down your leg despite all the practice at home. I still remember it, and I still laugh.