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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Employer making life VERY difficult.

753 replies

Titslikepicassos · 03/05/2020 13:58

Supposed to be returning from MAT leave in June, have childcare arranged and as a key worker they will still take my baby - excellent.

Had a team meeting with work this week to discuss going back and have been told that I have to relocate as my partner works on the same site as me - which has been known since I informed them we were in a relationship, however the policy changed in October (before I went on MAT leave). While we are on the same site, our jobs are separate and we are working in different buildings, have different managers and different hours. The different hours means I will need to do drop offs and pick ups to coincide with opening and closing hours.

So during the middle of a pandemic, with child care mostly closed I now have to find a new nursery, lose a significant term time deposit and start the settling in process all over again. Not only that, they have told me to find my own employment within the company - my head is exploding with all of this. AIBU to think this is an unnecessary ball ache!

I appreciate that this is a minor problem given the amount of people losing jobs!

OP posts:
RandomMess · 29/07/2020 17:56

I would be ringing ICO and speaking to them tbh.

That information was confidential from your line manager and it was placed where they could access it...

Deliberate or incompetent?

Princessbanana · 29/07/2020 18:19

@Titslikepicassos keep going, I know you are at the end of you rope but you can do this!💐💐💐

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 29/07/2020 18:24

@RandomMess - i mentioned this to DP, he asked what they would hope to achieve by giving her access... maybe relevant information, the entire HR team are being made redundant on Friday including HR business manager who was responsible for the breach.

Thanks for all the advice, I think I will contact the ICO. Tried ACAS but the queue was hours long.

OP posts:
Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 29/07/2020 18:25

Thanks for the kind words @Princessbanana. Trying really hard to not hand my notice in at the minute

OP posts:
LakieLady · 29/07/2020 18:40

The reason employers don't like people in relationships working together is it makes fraud easier

That certainly didn't apply in my case. We were 2 18-year olds in very junior roles in the Town Clerk's department. We weren't even allowed to access to the stationery cupboard!

Gazelda · 29/07/2020 18:46

Oh God, that's awful! I can't believe the stress they've put you under throughout your Mat leave. But you're nearly there now, and hold all the cards. Don't give in now, keep fighting and come out a winner.

Margaritatime · 29/07/2020 18:47

OP raise this with IPO ico.org.uk/make-a-complaint/your-personal-information-concerns/.
This is a serious breach of sensitive data and legally your employer must report within 72 hours.
Make it clear the breach is separate from your grievance and don't let them tie the two together.
If the communications have been verbal send an email confirming what they have told you I.e. This data, medical records etc. we're disclosed to X and whole company. X (your manager) confirmed they had read all the documents.
With regard to the grievance hearing ask them to hold on original date or a date when TU rep can attend. If not take a colleague and get them to write full notes of meeting.
You can do this Flowers

MrsSchadenfreude · 29/07/2020 18:52

Please make a complaint to the ICO. This is appalling.

Allmyeye · 29/07/2020 18:54

I’d contact ACAS for advice. They’ll be able to tell you exactly where you stand.

Margaritatime · 29/07/2020 18:55

To explain the risk of fraud - often procedures require two employees to sign off on payments, purchases etc.to prevent fraud. The assumption by some senior managers is that two employees in a relationship could do this and commit fraud. The reason it is applied to everyone is to prevent claims of discrimination.
Personally I don't agree with the rationale.

LakieLady · 29/07/2020 19:04

I agree with @Margaritatime, the data breach is a totally separate issue from the current grievance and a matter for the ICO.

I can see it's put you in an awful position, OP, and that some very sensitive information has been mishandled - very badly mishandled.

Could the fallout from this be so bad that you can't continue to work there? I'm wondering if a GDPR breach could make things so impossible that it could be construed as a constructive dismissal. What a woeful bunch of incompetents they are.

And you can't even have anyone hung out to dry for it if they're all being made redundant.

Did you ever get to the bottom of them reporting your relationship to the regulator, and whether that was a GDPR breach?

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 29/07/2020 19:44

Thanks all.

I have an email reporting what happened.

Grievance letter uploaded to the wrong file, my line manager had access to that file and HR are aware that she has read the first page of the letter Hmm. They are trying to tie it into the grievance claiming that it’s factual information that my line manager would be aware of (not true) However, I didn’t write the letter with the intention of my line manager reading it, due to my disclosure of health issues and the very delicate manner in which the witnesses wanted things doing (line manager is a tyrant and likely to make things very difficult now she knows I was supported by others). I would have retracted a large part of the content.

OP posts:
rarotonga2 · 29/07/2020 21:32

Shock Oh OP, it just sounds dreadful.

howfarwevecome · 29/07/2020 22:40

A complete and utter shit show. By and HR department that knows they're all out anyway.

Don't resign. Complain to any relevant organisation and go for payout for constructive dismissal instead.

BacklashStarts · 29/07/2020 22:46

It’s really really bad and really awful for you. But they are right that the ICO will see that as a very minor, human error breach.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 29/07/2020 23:19

Yes, having researched it, I don’t think the ICO or ACAS will care. It’s shit and poor practice but she could have seen the grievance letter anyway, they should have blacked out certain information but it’s not a huge, high risk breach. Going to cause issues with work place relationships though and undermines the grievance procedure for witnesses.

Doesn’t help me much, just made life more difficult.

OP posts:
DdraigGoch · 30/07/2020 00:29

Don't be tempted to resign. If there are redundancies in the firm you may benefit from a payout.

honeygirlz · 30/07/2020 01:16

Just read the thread today. I'm so sorry your manager read your grievance letter OP. I'm wondering if this could work in your favour somehow? Everyone is now aware of how you've been treated and your manager knows you won't take this lightly. It also puts pressure on them to put this right as it's another fuck up from them.

Or do you think manager is forewarned and therefore forearmed after reading the letter?

AngelaScandal · 30/07/2020 06:00

Talk it through with ICO.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 30/07/2020 07:07

I want to resign but won’t.

Not sure if forewarned is forearmed in this case, I have witness statements and a fair amount of evidence. It’s shown that I was supported and a lot of people knew what she was doing though and she’ll hate that.

I’ll give the ICO a call today and see what they think.

OP posts:
Margaritatime · 30/07/2020 07:33

OP tell the ICO this may have been done intentionally to undermine your grievance.

PrincessForADay · 30/07/2020 15:59

OP I'm so frustrated for you reading your update.

RandomMess · 30/07/2020 16:08

I wonder if there is a greater duty of care over the information because it could
Prejudice a grievance case?

Thorgod · 30/07/2020 16:16

@Kinkybutkind

It strikes me, that two people - one male and one female are in the same position (ie: cannot work with customers together) and that the woman returning from maternity leave is being expected to make the adjustments to resolve this ... I think you have a clear case of discrimination based on maternity which is a protected characteristic and therefore you would have quite a solid case to lodge against your employer should you wish to do so... not sure your partner should resign to be honest, if you were to claim constructive dismissal you may have a better chance than he would have based on the limited information you have given!!
Exactly this summary. Even an email quoting this and cc-ing a (fictitious?!) Union rep or employment lawyer should make them rethink. And say that you are concerned this looks like you are being discriminated against because you went on mat leave, returning to find:
  1. Policy only being implemented post mat leave and
  2. You not your partner being expected to change and
  3. You are not working alongside customers together so policy is being misapplied and
  4. They sent your stuff home

I just left a job after my employer did a similar thing and the threat of tribunal made them cough up 4months pay and an agreed reference (I didn't want to go back.to work for them).

You should not be sucking this up even if others are losing your jobs - you don't have to lose.yours! And what if they are trying this on with other women?! Stuff them.

Thorgod · 30/07/2020 16:19

Just seen I've missed updates. Don't resign! They can pay you off you can go sick with stress (this is stressful) but don't let them push you out. Bastards! I'm fuming on your behalf AngryFlowers