Page 3 | Has anyone allowed their parents to meet their newborn during the pandemic?

CandleFlames · 2020-05-02T13:09:11+00:00

Just curious to see answers. My baby is three weeks and hasn’t met anyone obviously, and we plan to do this until guidance changes. I’m just wondering if anyone has had anyone meet their baby from outside of the household. Just interested, no judgement!

OneMomentInHistory · 03/05/2020 19:07

I'm not due for another couple of months, so who knows what world we will be living in. But current plan is for my mum and stepdad to self isolate for two weeks, then as long as they're well, mum will come to ours to look after our toddler and stay for a couple of weeks. I'm due a c section, so a) can plan and b) will need help!

Bubblesbubblesmybubbles · 03/05/2020 19:11

Rest of the year, blimey! If its what you feel is right for you though, go for it

I think by the end of June there will be much more clarity on vaccine trials alongside the use of existing drugs to treat. I'm going to remain hopeful that by then it will be easier to see family

Hockeyboysmum · 03/05/2020 19:12

My boy was born 29th april and has met my mum and she is staying with us for lockdown. He was in nicu for a couple of weeks after birth. Just yesterday he has been admitted back to hospital and looks like he may need shunts fitted in his brain in next few days. Also possible infection in his blood. I am terrified he will never have the chance to meet his aunts and uncles but i couldn't take the risk while he was home.

Rosebel · 03/05/2020 19:17

I'd love for my family to meet my baby before then but I'm also incredibly nervous. If we know more by the end of June I may review but it just depends what happens. Think I'm mentally preparing for the worst just in case.

gonewiththerain · 03/05/2020 19:22

I’m due in August, it worries me every time I go to an appointment that I’ll catch it and bring it back.
So I don’t think they be a risk to the baby but I think I could be a risk to them

Scruffyoak · 03/05/2020 19:26

Only through window
Sad yes but not worth risk. Not at all.

isadoradancing123 · 03/05/2020 19:28

The virus isnt going to switch off at midnight on any given day, rules are just a guideline, people will have to make their own risk assessment judgements

ChikiTIKI · 03/05/2020 19:46

DD2 born on 30th March. Not had any visitors apart from my mum who looked after DD1 on the day and then came back the next day to look after DD1 while husband collected me from hospital (I did ask if the staff could help me to the hospital entrance but they couldn't, and children visitors were not allowed on site, so DH had to collect me alone).

So mum stayed for a minute after we got home and looked at baby from a distance before leaving. Couple of days later she came back to look after DD1 while DH took me back to the hospital due to some complications. Again just saw eachother for a minute but I will be honest, I passed her the baby- she didn't ask me to and didn't really want to (but obviously really did!) but there we go. After the time she spent with DD1 by that point I thought if she has germs then they're in the house now.

5 weeks old tomorrow and that's the only family interaction we've had. Couldn't do anything else from a distance as it would really confuse and upset DD1, she's only 2.5 yrs.

Beckyboom · 03/05/2020 21:06

A friend of mine had a baby 2 weeks ago.

Her parents and siblings have all been at home, self isolating since the start of lockdown. Only seeing person delivering shopping.

They have all been visiting my friend’s house a couple of times a week.

I think they are all crazy. Two people I know have been hospitalised with the virus (confirmed) having only had contact with supermarket delivery drivers/postman. They don’t know how they managed to catch it.

It worries me so much for my friend’s baby.

IvinghoeBeacon · 03/05/2020 21:18

chances are that the baby will be fine if it does catch it. I am more worried about PILs and my father (all over 65 and with health conditions) than I am about my newborn - we were much more of a risk to them having been in hospital when my baby was born than they are to us given that they have been self isolating for weeks

Bubblesbubblesmybubbles · 03/05/2020 21:29

@beckyboom that is incredibly bad luck for those you know who have caught it self isolating!!

The problem is also the risk of PND if people need the family visiting. I wouls never normally put myself in the catagory of at risk of PND but soon to have a baby and a toddler, once DH is back at work the sheer exhaustion could cause that if no one else is able to come and assist AND i can't take DC1 for outings where he will be entertained. Its such a mad situation!

Temple29 · 03/05/2020 21:39

I’m due my second baby the beginning of September and thinking it’s unlikely we would allow any visitors unless things drastically change in the meantime. I would never forgive myself if I wasn’t cautious and something happened to the newborn. I also have underlying medical conditions myself and another child who will be 17 months old.

No idea what to do about childcare during labour though because anyone we had hoped could watch DS has not been following the guidelines at all.

user3274826 · 03/05/2020 21:47

If the grandparents are youngish and not at risk, I wouldn't judge if I heard of it happening tbh.

The main issue is not the newborn catching it, it's the grandparents catching it from the mother who will have either just been in a high risk area or have been in contact with key workers. So it's not a case of its ok if everyone self isolates in the run up at all.

One of my neighbours died this week from Covid, it just all happened so quickly. I think it would have only added to the tragedy if they'd have had a new grandchild they'd been waiting to meet but following rules so hadn't got the chance to. So that is something to consider. So even if the grandparents are not low risk, if the new baby and parents self isolate, don't even get any shopping delivered (have it all in advance) then maybe the best thing would be to let grandparents visit when baby is 2-3 weeks old?

Jen306 · 03/05/2020 21:57

My parents came and stood at one end of our garden to ‘meet’ their first grandchild.
They stayed in their car on the drive, hubby opened our side gate to the back garden, and I went with baby and sat in the shade in the arbor at the far end then hubby joined us. Once we were there my parents came round the back and stood on our patio to see the baby and have a quick chat to check we were ok (wasn’t a totally straight forward birth) - we were at least 10 metres apart and they didn’t touch anything.

Jen306 · 03/05/2020 21:57

My parents came and stood at one end of our garden to ‘meet’ their first grandchild.
They stayed in their car on the drive, hubby opened our side gate to the back garden, and I went with baby and sat in the shade in the arbor at the far end then hubby joined us. Once we were there my parents came round the back and stood on our patio to see the baby and have a quick chat to check we were ok (wasn’t a totally straight forward birth) - we were at least 10 metres apart and they didn’t touch anything.

Beckyboom · 03/05/2020 22:00

@Bubblesbubblesmybubbles It really is - they’ve both been told that possible they had an unusually long incubation period or were asymptomatic for an unusually long time.

Neither have required ICU fortunately just breathing support.

IvinghoeBeacon · 04/05/2020 06:17

“The problem is also the risk of PND if people need the family visiting. I wouls never normally put myself in the catagory of at risk of PND but soon to have a baby and a toddler, once DH is back at work the sheer exhaustion could cause that if no one else is able to come and assist AND i can't take DC1 for outings where he will be entertained. Its such a mad situation!”

This is where I am now, my husband Is back at work . Not previously high risk for PND

Bubblesbubblesmybubbles · 04/05/2020 07:40

@Beckyboom fingers crossed they improve quickly.

@IvinghoeBeacon so sorry to hear that, what's your age gap? Its so tough. Have you got anyone who could come to stay? Ive got a friend who I might ask to once DP is back at work. I trust her to have stuck to the rules and I know we can live together as we did at Uni

PenisBeakerDipper · 04/05/2020 07:43

We have been holding ours up in the window when the in laws drop off supplies. My mum lives in Ireland so it’s whatsapp vidéo calls only.

Pleasedontdrawonyoursister · 04/05/2020 07:47

Someone on my street had a baby last week. Her parents and her bother have been together and separately on more than one occasion. Whilst it’s a bit irritating they’re breaking the rules as such, it’s only themselves they’re putting at risk and I can totally understand the desire to meet a newborn. By the time this is over they could be months old!

Bubblesbubblesmybubbles · 04/05/2020 07:51

@pleasedontdrawonyoursister I'd be worried about the risk to the visitors that soon after birth, we've said we want to self isolate for 2 weeks minimum after getting home to protect family from us. Although we are incredibly lucky to be in an area which doesn't really seem to have been hugely affected I am still not willing to risk causing issues to others.

Sipperskipper · 04/05/2020 08:00

I’m due DD2 in August. Hoping things will be a bit more settled by then, but either way, I will need to see my mum as she will be looking after DD (nearly 3). I’m having a section and know I will be in for a couple of days.

She is high risk anyway, so her & my dad have been pretty much self isolating since the start, and will continue.

To be honest I’m more worried about potentially bringing Covid home from the hospital & passing it to my mum! We have said that she will look after DD, but when I come home we will have to keep apart / no newborn cuddles, just chat at a distance. Then will give it a week or so to check I have no symptoms, and then hopefully see each other properly.

I will need her help once DH is back to work after paternity leave anyway, to drive DD to and from preschool etc, and just in general. I couldn’t have been without her last time.

The whole thing is making me anxious just thinking about it, such a mess.

IvinghoeBeacon · 04/05/2020 08:37

Bubblesbubblesmybubbles Thanks - age gap is 2yrs almost exactly
I have a relative who is currently self isolating in the hope that she will be able to stay for a couple of weeks

Ponoka7 · 04/05/2020 08:52

There's been a few births in the neighbourhood. People have seen the newborn in the garden and through windows. We've had people die in my city from 50 with no underlying health conditions. So you might not get a chance to, if it's put off. The vaccine may not work for the over 65's and for under 2's.so in some cases it will be a matter of people never seeing new babies in the family. You've got to think out the risks of transmission and work around them.

I'm watching the news on refugee camps and people returning home to Iran and Afghanistan, because there is no work. We aren't seeing deaths within the younger population, including newborns etc. We are using those poor people's situation as a learning curve. We'll understand transmission a lot better in a couple of weeks. From what we understood at the start, it should have ripped through the camps.

stormy11 · 04/05/2020 09:08

I have a 12 week old and I am lucky that most friends and family have met her before lockdown.

I am really worried that once lockdown ends everyone will want to come round to see her and give her cuddles. I am not the best person at saying no but think I will have to. If visiting is allowed I was thinking family could come to the garden and see her but no cuddles as I would rather not take the risk. I also wouldn't want to pass it on to anyone if we were carrying Covid 19 either.