Or are employers being crap towards working parents?

[UntamedShrew]

I just wanted to get a sense of if my employer is being particularly shit or if others are in the same boat. There has been no adjustment in workload, in fact it’s higher than ever. I can see why and I’m happy to do my bit but...
I work part time (2 days a week) but it’s currently more like 4, as reacting to the crisis means there is more to do.
I have been asked to take a pay cut even though I’m already only earning for part time hours so earning a fraction of full time (male!) colleagues.
Not one person from HR or my boss has checked in to see if I’m ok.
Not one person from HR has checked in on my (quite young and in less secure financial positions) colleagues.
I work in the City so any cost savings won’t be used to save jobs, it’ll be to protect profits.
I feel like I’m letting my children down to slave for an unappreciative boss, as I’m having to largely leave them to school themselves - and they are too young to do so (7 and 10).

AIBU and should I feel happy to have any job frankly, or am I justified in feeling exploited and undervalued? As I said would love to know if others are having a similar experience or if any other firms have put in place any decent measures to look after staff wellbeing.

@fia101

I'm classed as a key worker......I've a 2 year old, 5 year old and 6 year old and they've lost out. They're in front of the tv most of the day at the moment as I'm in video cons.

No one has asked how I'm doing or the kids. Not their problem I know but don't they think - when I've been on a tele-con for 2 hours "who has the kids"?

As you are a key worker and it sounds like your husband is also working FT, perhaps they assume you have sent the kids to school and nursery?

I‘m curious, how can the TV occupy the 2 year-old all day? Mine is 3 and just sticking him in front of the telly doesn’t work as he’s up and down asking me to change the programme, wanting me to comment on what Tinky Winky is doing, or he gets bored and starts breaking stuff/putting himself in danger. I know you have 2 older ones who might help but 4 is also pretty young, attention-span wise, and do they not end up fighting?

Sorry ignore the reference to 4 year old, I see your middle one is 5.

That’s awful!!! I work for a City firm and we’ve been given extra leave to help care for dependants, managers being told to be very flexible on when and even if people work their full hours and committed to make no pay cuts and redundancies for Covid. They’re even giving bonuses for people who have gone above and beyond!

A few people responded to my experience of male staff having SAHMs and not, therefore, bearing the full brunt of combining WFH with childcare by saying that their male colleagues also had kids in the background on video calls etc. I’m obviously glad that your overall experience has been better than in my workplace. However I would still question whether those kids are really in the room with these guys all day as they try to concentrate and get on with work between calls. In some ways it’s easier to have a kid there when in a call as they can see you are speaking to someone else and you might be able to dip in and out of a meeting fairly easily. Plus rolling out the tousle-haired urchin to entertain colleagues gives you all the brownie points. But I wonder who is planning the kids’ meals and directing their school work?

My colleague was talking to a man a bit more senior than her, whose wife works. His kids primary age same as hers. She asked how they were getting on with home schooling. “Oh, my wife is doing a sterling job!” he smiled. The more they talked, the more she realised he had absolutely zero involvement in the home schooling and, tellingly, he did not think that this was in any way his responsibility. However they do get rolled out to say hi to the team in a regular basis..

My manager hasn't checked in, or any other managers. I'd just do the hours you're contracted for but you make a rod for your own back if you've always done extra. I've always made it clear I'm working my hours so I'm never expected to do more. My colleagues can do it if they want, they're on twice my salary.

If they're busy what are they going to do? They can't get anyone else to do the work so you doing your hours is better than nothing. They can't say you're not performing because you're fulfilling your contract. They won't find anyone else to do so many free hours, so don't let them take the piss. Just log off, update your calendar and they'll learn not to expect you until you're next logged on. In my experience if I was working more hours I'd just be propping up lazy full timers so what's the point.

I know I might not sound conscientious but I really am and nominated for awards for my effort for the team. It's not about how many hours you do.

I'd just do the hours you're contracted for but you make a rod for your own back if you've always done extra. I've always made it clear I'm working my hours so I'm never expected to do more. My colleagues can do it if they want, they're on twice my salary.

Indeed, your senior colleagues and OP may actually have clauses in their contracts that say they have to work whatever hours are necessary to do the job. It’s pretty common. I did ask OP about that but she didn’t clarify.

Sorry Aardvark I missed that. Yes it’s a task related not hours related contract so it’s very difficult to argue against, I can see that.

I’m gutted for all of you posting about your awful experiences. What a shitty situation this is and it seems there is a huge variety in how firms have responded to it.