to ask when my toddler will be able to interact with other kids again?

[ShambalaHambala]

Pure speculation. It's been really odd that he's not been around other kids. Or anyone really apart from me! He's 18 months old and delighted that me and my boobs are at home with him 24/7. Must say, it was pretty sad today when we went for a walk and him and another toddler clocked each other, and me and the other parent both grabbed our kids and hurried them along. So, pure speculation, what's your guess? Nursery? Soft play? Etc. Bracing myself for a long slog of being my son's only interaction for a while!

Argh, sorry OP, I only saw you mention that you're a single parent working from home (respect!) after I'd already said about being worried about DH going back to work, sorry if it seemed insensitive

Oh @LisaSimpsonsbff the poor wee mite

@lisasimpsonbff don't be daft it's fine 😜 I think I would find lockdown harder if I were still with my ex 😅 some parts of being at home just you and a toddler are great. We all have our struggles regardless of our situations.

Also, that just made me feel so sad reading that. Park closed ☹️

I've always hated a dismissive attitude of children not remembering things so it doesn't matter/ don't bother (frequently found on holiday threads where it is apparently pointless taking a child under at least 5 on holiday. DS however loves reminiscing on the off-road jeep ride we did when he was 3, so it clearly left a mark. I remember the bunkbeds and hotel room I was sick in at 3 )

Children tend to play alongside each other rather than actively with each other until around 3-4. DS1 has high functioning autism and was still developing at it at 5 at school. Nurseries and the first couple of years at school will need to adjust on social skills in the next year or two because some children will have a little delay as they adjust and get back to normal interractions.

There is always a child or two with seperation anxiety and there is likely to be a few more for a while.

1:1 family time had its own benefits which are different to those of socialising with peers.

It is a valid concern, but for most children affected (and many will just adapt easily) there might be a few weeks/ months of adjustment to get back to where that child would have been under normal circumstances.

I've been talking to DS's teacher about his personal targets and my greatest concern out of this is his social skills. Fortunately his has a sibling close in age and interests which goes a long way, but I am concerned about his anxiety at adapting back to a normal busyness of social life in school. He's quite happy with a quiet life at home, but that's not the way the world will rock on long term. Incidentally, due to tough pregnancy/ birth, we didn't get out much when he was 2. Obviously he always would have had social delays with the ASD anyway, but even with that less than ideal phase (and a new sibling did rock his world), he still developed passable social skills, just more slowly than NT children.

My son is 27 now. I was lucky enough to be a SAHM until he was 14 months old. He had no interaction with any other children. We were having to move house at the time and I knew nothing about playgroups or nurseries etc in either old or new area! I loved being his only source of contact - until DH came home after work. Mind you, most often DS was already in bed then!

Private nurseries will have to open before September if they expect people to go back to work properly, schools were always going to be closed all summer and people would have childcare plans in place, if you have a young child in a private nursery that's what you rely on to allow you to work.
We're both keyworkers and our nursery has completely closed, it's unsustainable for us to keep working opposite shifts and trying to do confidential meetings and consultations and even court proceedings from home and the older our son gets the worse it will be, he really CANNOT overhear my work in particular once he starts repeating/understanding and DHs isn't much better. The only reason we can both work at home some of the time is that we both have the same high level of vetting and work in agencies that co-operate, so our senior managements have approved it. We're in emergency contingency mode at the moment but our outside of the home work is increasing more and more. Lots of our colleagues are affected in the same way.

This is the issue with the schools. They are all talking about 'kids dont spread it'. There hasn't been a mention of staff. Staff will spread it, not to mention how many staff are counted as vulnerable. I myself am pregnant, many of my colleagues have health conditions etc. My school had to partially close to 2 year groups as we were down 40% of the staff the week before lockdown. Where are staff supposed to find childcare? Do you demand staff with underlying conditions come in? How do you work a timetable of some years in and some years out with a school of 1500-2000 kids, part time staff, sick staff etc? Dont be so sure about all schools just reopening with 2 or 3 weeks notice in June. It's not that simple. It's not the students that are the issue.

I wonder too but have no clue as to when they'll to back. My two year old had started 3 mornings a week in January and had settled in really well. He was just referred for speech therapy but his language had started to come on a bit and he was becoming more interactive with the other children. So yeah I have felt sad for him it all getting going then suddenly stopping.

I hope he was just practicing his words as he went to sleep - he does often lie there just going 'apple, banana, dog woof woof' as he drifts off so I'm not sure how much meaning there is to it - but it did make me feel very sad

I'm sure you're right that it might cause a slightly delay but they'll catch up to where they would have been, bogroll and that was reassuring, thank you. I would just say, though, that people often say 'oh they just play alongside each other at that age' (I'm not saying that's how you meant it) as if it means it doesn't matter but my understanding, from a bit of reading I've done and also what DS's nursery think, is that parallel play is actually an important stage in social development.

@Sux2buthen I couldn't agree more with you spot on there your right it seems to be shut up and put up with it on Mumsnet at the moment when you mention young children missing out and the effects it's having on them.

You are met with all those things you've highlighted.

My DS 3yrs old was in the middle of speech and language therapy which has now been put on hold. He was also attending pre school nursery three days a week which he loved and was also getting some support in there to help him. We were awaiting on an assessment for him which has already taken a year so we know this will be even longer again now when this lockdown ends.
My DD 1 year old I feel awful for no taking her to the parks swimming as I had planned to when DS was in nursery getting her to socialise more with my friends little one but most importantly both kids are missing the grandparents.
I feel awful to because they are both so young it seems as though I'm being cruel keeping them inside with just a walk around the streets for our daily outings all the parks and green spaces are closed here in wales.

Ex teacher here and have studied a lot of child phycology over the years. If social distancing does carry on for say 1 year it will have a large impact on the development of young children IMO. As someone else mentioned up thread, much of a child’s personality, how he will interact and view others, anger, compassion, empathy and many other important qualities are set by age 5. If say an 18month old is not allowed to have any contact with other children for 1 year or more, this will have a lasting impact. It’s never been done before though on this scale in human history so what impact will only be seen afterwards and will very much depend on how long social interaction is delayed for

I dont understand how people can say kids wont be effected by this, especially toddlers. They are learning so much now. At 18 months they really learn a lot about sharing, being kind, being gentle, being independent. In this situation they arent learning in the same way they would if they were out interacting with children of their own age every day.

I am not silly enough to think it will be damaging to them, but it will have some effect. It cant just be fobbed off as 'kids are adaptable'. As adults we know isolation from the outside world can damage the mental health of certain people. Surely the same idea has to be applied to children.

It's just the interaction with other children, either, it's being in the world (and surely they normally would get that even if their mother was a SAHM who went to no groups, so it's not really comparable). If you read anything on child development it tells you how important it is that they do things like go to the shops with you to learn about the world - are people who think there is no effect saying that that was all just bollocks, then?!

Been feeling the same here. We've also had tears walking past the park 😭 it makes me feel so sad for all the weeks and months they are missing out on at school, at the park, mixing with their cousins and friends,seeing their grandparents. I know it's all for a good reason and I understand why it's necessary but I think it's ok to feel sad about those things as well. Tbf most kids will take it in their stride but some kids are extra sensitive to change esp one as a massive and sudden as this. My LG who's 5 is a deep thinker and I've had to answer some difficult questions that I just don't really have answers to ive seen a change in her the last few weeks.

I'm in the Netherlands and the lockdown rules were never as strict for the under 12s. Children and toddlers were seen playing together in the parks all the time but with the parents distancing from each other and other children.
Sports clubs restarted this week, and the schools go back next week. The children have been put into smaller groups, going on alternate days, and are allowed to play together but must stay away from the teacher.
Yes, they probably will spread the virus but it's not going to go away. It's about keeping the numbers under control and children were seen as the group most at risk from social distancing so are the first to have restrictions eased.
The Dutch are a very child-focused society. What happened in Spain, with children shut up in small apartments for six weeks, was absolutely horrifying.

Seeing grandparents and elderly people is still very much a no-no, but there are adverts constantly on children's television promoting waving through windows, video calls, leaving flowers on the doorstep etc to try and normalise the situation for the children and manage their expectations.
I'm not saying who is wrong or right, it's just a very different approach to other countries in Europe.

@BaronessBomburst that's very interesting. When it comes to grandparents, is it all grandparents or just elderly ones? My DDs grandparents are 55. Far from old. In the Netherlands would they be stopped from seeing their grandchildren too, even though they would still be working and shopping etc

Lisasimpson that just made me cry - how sad, poor little thing.

@ShambalaHambala
Many children still.dont go to nurseries etc if they have had a sahm and yet are well adjusted, so I wouldn't worry about all of the hype etc. Even if this went on another 2 years, your child would still have lots of opportunities to socialise and develop their peer skills.

Softplay I think will be one of the last to reopen. I'd hope. At the best of times it's a hive of germs.

Toddler groups with social distancing will be incredibly hard and I think many parents would opt against attending. But maybe there will be the option of visiting outside attractions like gardens, farms etc in the forthcoming months in the latter summer - maybe? But noone knows....

LisaSimpson, I wasn't dismissing parallel play, children clearly learn a lot by observing their peers and the wider world, it was more that close 2-way friendships tend to develop a bit later and more gradually than people often think. A toddler will favour some children more than others, but the friendship doesn't necessarily have deep bonds. Children often change their whole social group at the transition to school, and adapt quite quickly. Some miss their old social connections more than others, but it is a normal stage.

Getting out is important, and the more varied the better (obviously affected by circimsrances and location). I have despaired at some people needlessly keeping young children in for weeks and week when there is no specific need to shield).

It's nice to see people feeling able to talk about their worries for their kids. They are people too.
My son is five and started school in September. He was loving every second and formed some lovely friendships. His teacher is amazing and he's had to stop totally from the routine he was enjoying.
I know we all have. But it's hard for him to understand and then to have to face that what he enjoyed probably won't happen again at all because reception isn't the last year before sit down work really begins.
Kids feelings are enormous and a lot of people on here forget that

I do think it's a bit of a red herring to say that it's fine because lots of children don't go to nursery. The vast, vast majority of SAHMs still take their children out of the house to places where they encounter other people and to be honest if they didn't, under normal circumstances, people wouldn't see it as a good thing. The fact DS isn't going to nursery is more of a headache for me than anything else but the fact that he's not going on errands with me, not seeing his grandparents (who he adores), not ever really encountering anything new - a two year old's walk doesn't take you that far and where we live isn't very inspiring so we're just walking around residential streets each day - that stuff bothers me if it goes on longer (again, I think the few weeks it's been so far is fine).

@SqidgeBum Mixing households is discouraged so you would be expected not to see them either.
I actually paid a visit to a pregnant yesterday. I texted when I arrived, dropped a bag of clothes on the doorstep, then she opened the door and I chatted from the garden. We're still encouraged to interact safely as it's good for everyone's mental health.

*friend. It wasn't a pregnant goldfish.