I think he’s at it again

[JellyBaby90]

So, long story short. “D”h has left me before for another woman. I went against everyone’s advice and got back with him.
Now I’ve found emails between him and this other woman, which stop abruptly just before Christmas. I’ve also just found out he has a profile on “illicitencounters” on which he has been active in the last 24 hours... I know nothing of this site or how accurate the 24 hours is, but I’ve been a mug haven’t I? He’s doing it again and I’m in a joke of a marriage.
I love him, hate the thought of leaving him, but it’s my only option now I think. At least we don’t have kids together.
Not sure why I’m posting. Isolated from everyone and just need a shoulder to cry on so to speak.

That’s extremely shit. I’m sorry I have no advice, but stay strong

You poor thing, I’m so sorry that you are going through this. I think at least you know and can make an informed decision - there is no right or wrong decision and you should take some time and decide what is right for you. Stay strong x

Just file for divorce. You can do it online now so you don’t even need to wait for lockdown to be over. The second you decide it’s over, the relief will start.

I’m sorry to hear this. And yes it doesn’t sound good. Trust your Instincts. It will be hard for you for a while but getting away from this pathetic excuse for a man will be the best thing you ever did for yourself and your future happiness

www.gov.uk/apply-for-divorce

In case you decide to go for it. (You can get the ball rolling now & get legal advice about children and finances later.) A philanderer never changes.

Kick him out and file for divorce.
Its the only way and you already know that
Im sorry you're going through this, it's not your fault.

You dont deserve this. Nobody would.
Do what you need to do.

Not sure how you can have any love for this awful deceitful man. He seemingly has no morals, so he is not important now, but you are,so don't allow him to ruin your life anymore.

At least you haven't got kids so you won't be saddled with this cunt forever.

You really don’t love him. You love a made up fantasy. The man your with is scum.

So sorry to read your post. You showed a huge act of love and forgiveness by taking him back. You showed him what it truly means to honor your vows of commitment. One day he will realise how lucky he was and he will cry for your forgiveness. Stay strong and know that you are not the one at fault here - he is. Xx

Really sorry OP - I agree a philanderer will never change - don’t apply for anything just yet. As per advice on these boards - get your financial ducks in a row, make copies of bank statements / key document. Definitely get some legal advice and please please very seriously consider leaving that man.he sounds like a complete shit. You’ll be miserable with him if you stay x

Oh OP. You poor thing. It is heartbreaking, but I do think this is you eye opening moment. I’m so sorry.

When you are ready I think you should leave. dont give him the consideration of telling him in advance, why the fuck should you be open and honest with you when he has never been with you?

Leave a note, but dont tell him where or why. Let him go through a bit of what you have gone through, he'll find out when he gets the divorce papers.

I mean, I think you should just up and leave without discussion.

You love him? Or you don't want to be alone?
There is a difference, you know. Be honest.

Or is this what you think 'love' is?

It isn't, so why waste your life this way?

You ignored the blazing red flags the first time, don't do it again. Your husband is nothing but a filthy cheat. How many years do you plan on wasting with him?

Luckily there are no kids involved which makes leaving easier. I am very much of the opinion that cheating should not be forgiven.
There is no reason to cheat whatsoever.

Loving him aside, how about loving yourself more? You are worth SO much more than this and imagine a life where your daily concerns weren't about where Mr Dick-Rot was throwing it about.

The anxiety and stress he causes you, is this what you want for yourself? 🌺

The thing that is really confusing me is that for the most part he is acting completely normal... aside from the being secretive with his phone etc, he’s still laughing and joking with me etc.

You deserve so much better OP. Leave him and don't EVER look back. In a few months time you'll be so much happier and you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner.

He’s living his happy life and not giving a shit about you. He’s the cat that’s got the cream. Of course he’s smiling and joking!

If he cared and respected you he’d be torn up. He wouldn’t be able to laugh and joke with you.

Well of course he's at it again. Once lying cheating scumbag always a lying cheating scumbag. What gave you any illusions that he'd suddenly became a Saint. Get rid of the rotting bag of garbage. How people can say they love someone who treats them like this is just beyond me.

Wow just leave him. Why is he being secretive with his phone? Why did you get back with him? Not judging, just genuinely asking. Honestly he clearly doesn’t respect you, sorry OP

Because I thought he was genuinely sorry that he had messed up :( looking back on it though I’m not sure he sees anything wrong in what he’s doing. He did similar to his ex