Overheard a huge row

[TechnicallyNo]

This has been playing on my mind and I'm wondering what others would have done. Behind my house is garages owned by the surrounding houses accessed by a private driveway down the side of my house. There is a couple that are always parked up down there as they obviously go there to meet. I don't know anything about them but I have seen them and they seem to be Muslim so this could be a secret relationship. I often smell weed in the garden and they leave a load of rubbish in front of the garage when they've gone.

Anyway yesterday they were parked down there and I could hear the woman wailing and crying and them arguing. My kids were enjoying the garden as it was a warm day and I had to take them in the house as they were being really loud. She was shouting about wanting to take her own life and he was retorting with shut the fuck up you stupid bitch and things like that.
I tried to call 111 but I was worried that if they knew I had then they might do something to my house. I dont know it was just a frightening situation and I wonder what you would have done?
I wanted to tell them to get lost because of the noise and the fact that there are children in all the surrounding gardens.

They calmed down eventually and the noise stopped but they are parked down there daily usually in the middle of the night so I still kind of want to tell them it was unacceptable and people could hear

And so much easier to make comments like this to virtue signal than to accept the truth that this is much likelier to be an issue for a muslim woman than a non-muslim one.

Maybe, maybe not. More likely not tbh - there are twats everywhere. I think it's more important people don't deal in lazy racist stereotypes.

What general area of the UK do you live OP?
There's a Muslim girl that has gone missing in Leeds and there's a huge search on for her - from what I've seen on local news, I'm guessing they suspect something bad, as the police response is huge - bringing mountain rescue etc.

How does someone “appear Muslim” when you “don’t know anything about them”?

Also, if you think there’s a genuine danger to someone, why wouldn’t you phone the police?

Don't approach them as if they're into drugs and swearing etc they're rough- you don't know how they might respond, they might turn nasty.

Call the police if you hear a row like that again- they can't prove who rang.

How do you know they are Muslim btw?

How does it 'sound'like pregnancy or exploitation?
Its simply a secret relationship for whatever reason (affair, religion) and they had a barney..that's it

I think it's more important people don't deal in lazy racist stereotypes

And I think it's more important that we acknowledge that women and girls are subject to abuse and violence within certain cultures and communities more than others. I'm sick of women and girls being shoved under the bus and abused and not helped because people are more concerned about being accused of racism than protecting those women and girls.

And yea unless one of them was wearing a hijab or something how do they look muslim? Or were they just brown?

My dh is from a liberal Middle Eastern family and it would be considered scandalous if a woman was having sex outside marriage in their circle. I don't think it's a lazy stereotype at all.

Yes put notice up or call police.

Don’t approach them. The police could arrive and you don’t want to be caught up in some sort of unfortunate dogging episode.

A woman wailing and crying and threatening suicide? I'd have called the police. Here in Germany (city of 500,000) they'd be there within 15 minutes. Threat of domestic violence, disturbing the peace all mean nothing in the UK?

Fifteen minutes here in France too.

dont stand for this intrusion.

You should ring 999 for a situation like this!

In the UK I called 999 once because I walked past a house where I could hear an almighty row going on inside and a woman shouting "leave my baby out of it" and a child crying. They were there within 5 minutes. The police have finally (mainly) got to grips with how dangerous domestic arguments can be to women.

upsetting story, neighbours ignored woman's audible distress

A woman wailing and crying and threatening suicide? I'd have called the police. Here in Germany (city of 500,000) they'd be there within 15 minutes. Threat of domestic violence, disturbing the peace all mean nothing in the UK?

Please don’t judge UK citizens attitude towards the abuse of women on police response times. It’s more to do with the shocking levels of police resources Rohan anything else.

I'm guessing she knows shes Muslim as she was wearing a Hijab?
And come on, surely people cant actually think that a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim woman are treated and judged the same following revelations of an affair?
How do you explain the honour killings, domestic violence and deprivation of liberty that goes on predominantly in this culture? Its madness to deny its existence.

And I think it's more important that we acknowledge that women and girls are subject to abuse and violence within certain cultures and communities more than others. I'm sick of women and girls being shoved under the bus and abused and not helped because people are more concerned about being accused of racism than protecting those women and girls.

I think it's more important that we remove the plank from our own eye before we badmouth entire 'communities'.

Think what you like. There are good and bad muslims, there are good and bad non-muslims. To start from the assumption that someone is an abuser because of their colour or creed is racist AF.

I’d have rang 999 too, when I was in the control room I’d have graded it a 1 and had officers allocated for an immediate response.

And come on, surely people cant actually think that a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim woman are treated and judged the same following revelations of an affair?

bangs head against wall

You've no fucking idea who her family is, where in the world they are from, what their beliefs are, what the background to the argument is. You've seen the word 'muslim' and jumped to a conclusion. It's the definition of prejudice.

It doesn't matter if the police would be there in 15 minutes or 4 hours, they won't be there at all if no one calls them! Let the police decide if it is urgent or not. It may be that he is known to police for dv or that he has a restraining order already. Please just ring 999 if you hear that level of shouting and especially with her threatening to kill herself.

To start from the assumption that someone is an abuser because of their colour or creed is racist AF

Yeah, but that's completely not what I said, is it? But if you need to reframe what I have said in that way, it's kinda just confirms that you are unable to answer the point that there are cultural differences and muslim countries and communities are not favourable towards the sexual freedoms of women. If you think there ARE muslim countries and communities and cultures which are ok with sexual freedom and choices for women, please name them. Then I will name the ones that are not. It is just a fact that muslims in muslim communities are far more likely to be hostile to women being adulterous than a non-muslim in a western non-muslim country. It is not racist to point that out. It is not worthy of respect to ignore facts because you don't want to admit that some cultures have different beliefs and attitudes to others.

Also Muslim is a religion not a race.

nah. we see you.

Someone's seen a couple of the 'wrong' colour having a row in a car, and the MN islamophobe massive has conjured this narrative that they're having an affair; they're from a misogynistic muslim background that will look on this as shameful; and that she's at risk of mercy killing.

People have turned this thread into muslim-bash, when all that's happened is two people have had a row in a car.

Sorry, but a woman was wailing and being abused and you were purely concerned about the noise?! Give me strength

she's at risk of mercy killing

Honour killing.

See, dancing bear, the exaggeration you have gone to there, reaffirms my previous point to you. You can't actually address any of the points put to you. All you are left with is shouting 'racist'.

There isn't really any point arguing with you. You refuse to acknowledge any differences between cultures because you have an ideological belief that this is racist. You can't argue with people who eskew facts and evidence in favour of ideology.

BTW, far from being from an Islamophobic massive, I actually have a masters degree in religion, have a particular interest in the three monotheistic religions, particularly Islam, have spent many years studying Islam, particularly reading books by muslim women about their faith, or by women who have lived and worked in muslim countries, have attended many talks in Mosques or by Muslims and have read the Qu'ran, in several translations, so that I could see the different interpretations of the controversial passages. Labelling people 'racist' for having a different opinion from you, says more about you than them.