To be so bored of my lifelong weight battle

[littleblackdress04]

I have a happy weight but it’s an absolute daily battle to stay at it. I am 5’7 and my ideal weight is probably 10 1/2 stone, I am happy hovering around 11 stone and since the lockdown I am now 11,11 and so fed up! I eat really healthily, track on an app, exercise every other day (running, Joe wicks etc) and barely drink. I am perimenopausal which is probably a factor in this as seem to be running to stand still at the moment- I am 47.

I am SO utterly sick of it - bored of it- I want to stay a size 12 as it’s what I have been all my life. I got to 11 stone last year by doing fast 800 and felt really great, the best in years but now since being cooped up, it’s all gone back on and it’s not shifting. It’s making me so fed up! Aibu? Any thoughts? I track everything & try to follow a Mediterranean diet too! Is it mid life kicking in?

Not eating rio! Spell check phone fail!!! Just emotional eating out of boredom

Yep it's miserable.
I see my DH at 45 can eat like a horse, drink regularly, do a small bit of exercise (that he really enjoys), and remain the same weight he was when he was 25

I on the other hand have to watch every little bit that goes into my mouth, try to do exercise every day that I struggle through, and still end up 2 pounds up for no fathomable reason

I'm absolutely get where you're coming from OP.

I'm the same height as you and hover between 10 stone and 10 and a half. Keeping myself under 10 and a half and therefore in my size 12 clothes comfortably is a battle that never ends. I need to workout or walk every day without fail and track my calories religiously on an app I use in order to stay at this weight. The moment I stop those things my weight inevitably starts to creep up slowly but surely.

When I was younger if I let my weight creep up it was relatively quick and easy to lose it again but as I've got older (51 now) it has got harder to do this. In some ways this motivates me more not to let go however as I know how hard it will be to get back to my ideal weight if I let myself get too heavy.

I have all my life been subject to people telling me how lucky I am to be slim and fit when in actual fact it is anything but luck and I know exactly what you mean about sometimes it just feels like such a battle.

Ultimately however I enjoy nice food and a glass of wine so if in order to be able to do that I have to be disciplined then so be it.

This is awful. I just refuse to buy the 'I'm going into the menopause so can't do anything' narrative. And it's not just about how much you eat or exercise either! I'm 55 and my metabolism hasn't materially changed - I just (sometimes) eat FAR too much and I'm not walking everywhere fast (commuting), clubbing or out and about.
I think you have to try different things out to see what works. Low carb does not work for me - but it does REALLY well for others.
Believe it or not yoga is amazing because it doesn't make you hungry after and gets you very fit very fast. Give it a go online. It's the best thing ever.
'Incidental' exercise like getting stairs and walking or cycling places works - but do it like a kid - fast. OMG when I think of how much I ate back then.
Eating to support hormones - there's some great suggestions here, looking after your gut biome, not restricting natural fat too much, eating a wide variety of fresh food, avoiding processed.
Try an online hypnosis (free ones on YouTube).
But right now get that 11 pounds off and then some. Go back to fast 800 because now is the time (not like you can go to the pub). Then you'll feel in control and happier.
And while you probably can't exercise on it you CAN do yoga. And trust me it makes a huge difference to how you look.. though you need 3-4 sessions a week to make decent progress. It's great though, in the beginning every time you do it you can do something you couldn't last time.

If you're desperate to lose that 11 pounds there's my go to diet. It's called the simeons diet and it's been widely rubbished by people who have never done it and so 'know' it is wrong. People who do it love it. A pound a day every day. 500 cals. Only certain foods and no alcohol (I do have cheat days which you're not supposed to). With only 11 pounds you can do a 3 week round have a few days off and lose closer to a stone.

You have to buy the stuff online (carefully, from abroad. I have a go to pharmacy pm if you need) plus it's injections so you need insulin needles. However to answer any questions

• no I am not hungry on 500 cals, day after day
• no I do not feel weak/dizzy
• no the injections are not hard or painful
• yes it probably is banned. I don't care.
• you only put the weight back on if you OVER eat.

Study after study shows crash diets and fasting are not harmful, do not result in weight going back on (any more than other diets) and do work.

I can't actually do the fast diet (I get too hungry by 8pm and cave) which is why I have this. I'm on it currently, but long term I need to stop over eating. That's my fault, and my responsibility and not the diet. All that does is get me back in my clothing and you know what? It feels GREAT to watch that weight coming off and to feel like it's getting back under control. Everyone's different. I find the eating relatively easy as the injections (plus coffee!) mean I'm not hungry.

Different things work for different people. Intermittent fasting is the only thing I can stick to and it's the only reason I'm not fat. I just can't be fucked with tracking calories or whatever and I stick to it for a few days max, I've tried a hundred times. With my fasting routine it's very simple. I can either have nothing or anything I want, there's no grey area. I've been doing the same thing for over a year now and I love it and find it really easy.

I'm a bit like this and I'm only 29 and have been like it all of my 20s. I'm 5ft 6, a size 8-10 and weigh 10st 3lbs. I can only maintain this by really restricting what I eat mon - fri (eg skipping dinner once or twice a week, very small breakfast and lunches, no drinking alcohol at all in the week) and strenuous exercise 4 times a week. If I was to exercise 2 -3 times a week and tbh eat a fairly normal balanced diet I hit 10st 7lbs and stay there. But i go up to a solid size 10, sneaking into a 12 at times. I'm really exercising atm every day but I'm eating more than normal. An evening snack, a gin and tonic of an evening, dinner every night and I'm up already to 10st 7lbs and it feels so uncomfortable on me

I struggle to eat as I have histamine intolerance, maybe gastritis - I am not saying this is healthy but a milky cappuccino (make that 2 pints!) in the morning means I am just not hungry for ages. Although it’s meant to be healthy, I always found eating breakfast made
Me more hungry - Sometimes I think you just need to shrink your stomachs expectations first. I used to be able to eat a builders dinner now I can barely eat a full plate - tbf it’s not much fun dreading what you eat in case it makes you sick but I am slim

You’re right, it’s boring. You say you’re peri menopausal, how much of your life have you wasted thinking about weight?,when you could have been having fun or solving climate change, whatever floats your boat.

What a waste of a life and what an epitaph. ‘Here she lies, she lived and died 11 stone and worked hard everyday to keep her weight within limits’
Will anyone care?

Maybe take this as a wake up call to spend your time doing something fun/worthwhile and eating food you love in quantities which are satisfying, maybe you’ll be fatter, maybe you won’t but at least it will be a life worth living.

I know what you mean. If I ate a standard amount of carbs I would be around 11.8 and at 5’4” and an apple shape and this is not acceptable to me.
I would also recommend Why We Get Fat (Taubes).
I’m 44 and follow low carb and exercise, including weights. I’m prepared to do it because being slim is highly important to me and it does all work but the sacrifice feels quite harsh sometimes. However it keeps me under 10stone which is where I’m happy and fit.

What a waste of a life and what an epitaph. ‘Here she lies, she lived and died 11 stone and worked hard everyday to keep her weight within limits’
Will anyone care?

Yeah .... I care. It's massively important to me

I'd rather like my epitaph to be: "NiceLegs: Yorkshire Champion 2021" but that hope is intrinsically linked to my weight.

I get that not everyone will be motivated by it. But ..... "the world don't move to the beat of just one drum". If solving climate change is your thing, then ... great.

And ... I am having fun

I'm similar OP, have to watch myself in order to stay at my 'happy weight' (around 10 st) Tbh, I guess it's a choice. I could just stop and be happier a bit bigger but I dont want to. I still eat all the things I want, just not all at the same time!

I'm short, 40s, not very active and apparently my calorie requirements for maintenance at my healthy bmi is about 1250. I mean come on is that fair!! But it explains why it's so hard.

Not the answer but eating lots of empty calorie foods may help - I mean sweet corn for example, fills you up but doesn’t put the weight on x

Oh god I feel your pain totally. My weight has dominated my entire adult life and I am so sick of it. I would pay for something to just kill my appetite.

Same. 5ft 5 and 11st7 desperate to be 10st7 but have to starve myself to get there. Can’t eat a lot to even maintain. Gets me down too

I've battled it all my life and it feels like I'm losing badly. I had an eating disorder for 25 years which I've managed to control now for 7 years, but unfortunately my weight has gone up. and up. and up. I'm really obese now.

My mum doesn't help (step mum but I've known here since I was 7 ish) Every time I phone her (shes 75) she tells me how much she weighs. Every single time. and it is literally half what I weigh. She's never been above 9 stone in her life but is absolutely obsessed with being slim. I don't think she can fathom how I can be so fat.

I'm so very tired of it.

My Nan was also obsessed with her weight up until the day she died in her bloody nineties!!!!! Crazy.

I'm the same. Constant battle to maintain a good weight.

I've gained a few pounds since in lockdown : and tbh it's not even been my eating anything major! The odd bit of pasta, cake, chocolate. It's not relative to a 5lb weight gain, or at least I don't feel it should be.

I cannot gain weight - I refuse to go back to a 14 stone chubster, prediabetic, looked ten years older and snored. No fucking way.

I'd rather just eat properly, even if it's tedious!

I’m with you OP, it’s shit.

I’m 27 and since I got married a year ago I’ve shot up to teetering on the edge of the healthy/overweight BMI range.

And according to the online calculators 2000 calories a day is WAY too many for someone of my height, especially to lose weight AND sedentary due to lock down.

So I’m dutifully obeying and eating a lot less, predominantly healthy foods and my god it’s dull. I’m mainly veggie as well so it’s even more difficult to get excited about eating.

My other minor annoyance is that my bod seems to love clinging on to fat on my arms, Which means to look slim I have to lose more weight everywhere else than I’d like to just to get it off my arms!! Grr. I want a McDonalds.

I'd rather like my epitaph to be: "NiceLegs: Yorkshire Champion 2021" but that hope is intrinsically linked to my weight

Weight or percentage of body fat? Based on my own experience, I suspect the latter.

I'm short, 40s, not very active and apparently my calorie requirements for maintenance at my healthy bmi is about 1250

That sounds about right. I gain weight if I eat more than 1300 kcals a day. Exercise makes zero difference to my weight (but improves fitness, obviously), weight really is all about what you eat.

Following. I've upped my running lots since lockdown but at 5'1 I'm now 10.5 stone. Wanted to go tonight but feel like wtf is the point I dont even enjoy it ,look a big fat mess and I'm getting bigger
Video taken of me with my DD yesterday made me want to cry. Only thing that works for me really is low carb. Did it a few years ago, got to 8.9. No exercise other than walking. Not to brag but I looked bloody good. I wish I could get in that mindset again. Had a miscarriage in nov and been piling it on since.

I never had a weight problem until the menopause. I don't think I'll ever get back to my former weight, but I'm not sure it would actually be desirable. I think an extra few pounds help to keep the wrinkles at bay...

Exercising may not be a very effective way of losing weight in absolute terms, but I find it absolutely crucial to maintain a 'healthy outlook'. If I've been exercising for an hour, I don't want to mess up all the good work by wolving down an eclair... However, my resolve tends to vane as the day progresses.

I find the only way to stay virtuous is to not have shit in the house. No bread. No booze. No sweets. Et cetera. But I do make sure I always have vegetables and salad stuff. I love Middle Eastern vegetable dishes and salads, plus maybe some fish or chicken a few times a week. This is my go-to cookery book - this type of food is always healthy and never boring:

A Lebanese Feast of Vegetables, Pulses, Herbs and Spices By Mona Hamadeh