3 year old won’t eat proper meals

[Serenjoan17]

Ok so I’m really struggling with my daughter, she’s just turned 3 but is a nightmare to feed, her diet literally consists of.. toast, cereal, yoghurt, fruit, cheese, kids lentil crisp things, fish fingers (if I’m lucky) and cereal bars, water and milk at bedtime. At meal times she throws a fit if I try and get her to eat a proper meal, won’t even try anything to the point where she will just leave the table if I ask her to eat. I’ve tried letting her eat from my plate (she won’t) eating in different rooms, and different presentation of food to make it fun, colourful, different plates etc What can I do ??

I have a very fussy 3 year old. Her diet is pretty much milk, yoghurt, fruit, toast, salad, dry pasta and cheese sandwiches. Occasionally she'll nibble a fish finger, a sausage, some ham or a chicken nugget. But she's absolutely fine I can tell she's healthy and getting enough food. I give her a multi vitamin sweet every day. I have a 5 year old who was a very fussy 3 year old too who is only now starting to try new things. My advice is to hang in there and try not to worry or make meal times a battle.

Leave her to it.
I was terribly fussy as a young child-eat everything now. The more you try the worse it gets.
Give her what you eat and something she likes, make no fuss.
One day she’ll eat better! It’s not worth getting stressed about.

Sounds alright to me. Quite a varied diet really.

Thank you 😊 So nice to know I’m not the only one ! I know she is healthy and health visitor on her last check said she’s obviously getting what she needs. She’s starting more hours at nursery when it reopens so I’m a little worried about how she’ll take to the lunches, fingers crossed seeing other kids eat will encourage her abit x

I had a 3 year old like this, she’s a bit better now she’s 9 😆. We found it was a lot to with texture of fruit and veg so would eat those baby fruit pots and pouches and well blended veg sauces and soups. And a daily vitamin supplement. Mine would happily go without dinner so giving one option didn’t work. A plate with sections and different bits in each section (carrot sticks, apple) helped a lot. She never got rickets or scurvy and is intelligent and well adjusted now. I do understand how stressful it is.

Mine started nursery at 9 months. Was still as fussy as hell. Just plain rice some days. Loved making fruit kebabs but would she eat them? Nope. Jacket potato with cheese every day through infants when lunches were free.

And ignore the judgemental parents of good eaters. It’s not your fault.

Relax.
She s eating a variety.
At nursery and school peer pressure can instil better habits

I read somewhere recently that children's bodies (and adults to some extent) are amazing at adapting to extract the nutrients they need from their diet, even if it isn't as varied as recommended. Obviously keep trying to offer different things where you can, even if she plays with it in her fingers that's considered "exposure" and if you keep up the exposure, she may well surprise you and eat it after a few offerings. It's really frustrating but be reassured that your daughter won't be deficient for being a bit fussy.

Just hide as much veg in sauces and mash it up to hide texture etc. You said she will eat toast? Could you make pizza toasties etc with homemade hidden veg tom sauce and cheese and cut into little squares ot shapes or will she eat pizza made the same way? I found this worked for my child. My advice is find would she likes and use it to your advantage.

Mine was the same at 3, even though his nursery said he'd eat anything given to him there! He's just turned 4 and now he will eat pretty much anything. We started by offering something new with the foods he would eat, and encouraging him to try them (bribery works!). Then I started to be strict and refused to give him anything else unless he at least tried what he was given. Sometimes I have to feed him to get him to eat it, but now he will eat curry, chilli, broccoli - all things he would have thrown a fit over previously.

The night time bottle might be an issue. She knows she's still getting something later if she refuses tea. Maybe stop that?

Tried the whole pizza toast thing 🙈 she will only eat toast with butter or jam ! I’ve even tried smoothies to get her extra fruit and veg but she won’t touch them.. will only drink water or milk which in a way is great because there’s no juice / pop in sight 👍 x

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Let her have her milk at bedtime, if she's a fussy eater then she needs both the calories and the vitamins/nutrients.

Basically the best course if action is to ignore the fussing. Keep offering a good variety of foods, always make sure there is at least one of her accepted foods on offer at every mealtime so she's eating something rather than nothing, and at the main meal of the day (e.g., teatime) offer a main followed by a simple dessert of fruit or yoghurt with no conditions attached to the dessert - the idea behind this is that she will get enough calories across the two courses.

Don't cajole, beg, bribe, or persuade her to "have one more bite" or anything along those lines, just put the food down and then remove it at the end of the meal without comment.

If she eats absolutely nothing then try and get her to wait until the next mealtime but if she seems particularly hungry or its going to be a long time to the next meal (e.g., overnight until breakfast) then around an hour after the rejected meal offer a basic snack such as toast or some cheese and crackers. Waiting a short period and calling it a snack presents it as separate to the meal that was rejected rather than a straight up replacement.

Make sure she has a good multivitamin every day such as WellKid which has all of the daily requirements in the necessary quantities.

In all likelihood, it'll pass and a few years from now she'll eat a much more varied diet

My kids hate sauce (

Don't worry about lack of vegetables but try to introduce different protein sources. Hummus or smoked salmon? My ds loved anything salty at that age.

Sorry posted by accident.

My kids hate sauces (except ketchup) and hate most cooked things. I just make lots of packed lunches basically. They are getting all the food groups. It's not my favourite way to eat and probably more expensive that casseroles and stews, but since accepting it they've been eating more and more variety. Whereas before child one liked apples and pears and child two liked kiwis and bananas, now they both eat all 4

They do like chicken nuggets/burgers/etc and fish Fingers/fish cakes etc. So I just do those in buns with salad followed by fruit and yoghurt most nights. I think it's boring as hell but I have found that condiments help, or I just make something else when they're in bed

You see this wouldnt work for my child as if it was all separate he would just pick at it and not eat all the good stuff!

@Yesterdayforgotten

Usually I put the stuff they like less out first, then add some extra bits

Oh my dc is stubborn and would just leave it even when very hungry; I have to hide it. They are all different that is for sure!

Mine was a nightmare at that age, frequently much worse than that. Sometimes wouldn't have anything at all. I just took the view that as long as he was eating, and there was some nutrition involved, that would do. Left him to it. He grew out of it. I'd just give yours what she'll eat, for now. What you describe isn't the worst in terms of balance either!

Yep, I agree leave her to it. She's healthy. And it's not like shes eating tonnes of crap, biscuits and fizzy drinks. Sounds good for now. She'll try more when she's ready

Relax! By all means, offer things to eat but with no pressure. Make sure you are offering things that you think she will like so she learns that trying new things means more yummy food to eat.

My dd was just like this when she was 3. We got her eating a few new things but still very limited until she was in yr 6 at school then she found the motivation to really increase her range of foods. Now at 16 she's turning into a bit of a foodie and regularly cooks dinner and finds new recipes to try out.

You have to play the long game with this and not expect instant results. The more pressure you put on yourself and her the worse it will be. Trust me I've been there. Don't listen to the people that say their children must eat what they are given so they do. They don't know how lucky they are. I have one child that was super fussy from the start and one that always ate everything from the start. Along with sleeping and toilet training, good eating habits are something that you can help along but a lot of it is down to luck of the draw!

For full disclosure dd was later diagnosed autistic and I think that had a lot to do with her eating issues.

My 2 boys are the same 5 year old getting better with school lunches but not quite where I want to be. It comes. My DD was the same and eats everything now.

Try Japanese style cute meals - you can get plates that help with this (search divided plates for children in Amazon).