Is anyone up? Please help me. Anxiety attack.

[HelpPleaseAnx]

I suffer really bad anxiety to the point I have regular attacks and think that everything I love will die. I'm on medication and seeing a counsellor (or was before lockdown).

One of my biggest triggers is my dog. He has got me through some really horrible stuff and because of my anxiety I just focus so much of it on him and think he's going to die all the time.

Tonight he's woken me up at about 2am and has been vomitting since. It is clear and watery but he's also drinking a lot of water so I'm not sure if it's just water.

I'm convinced he's going to die I am panicking so much and I don't know what to do. He's back in bed with me now and seems to be asleep but he's thrown up 3 times now and I can't stop my head racing. I have to keep checking he's breathing and my heart is going ten million miles an hour.

I'm so scared I'm going to wake up and he'll be dead. I'm going absolutely crazy, this is just a huge trigger for me I feel like this is it, this is the thing I've been waiting to happen. I'm sat in bed shaking and crying and I feel so fucking stupid.

Breath open up the window and take in deep breaths of fresh cold air . It will pass. My dog is sick all the time he probably ate too much or ate some grass it will be fine .

I'm awake (baby, sigh!) . I'm so sorry you're feeling so shit. I know so well that terror about loved ones and dogs are definitely loved and needed family members! I am no vet but I am sure a really sick at - deaths - door creature would struggle to get into bed with you and probably refuse to nice much. If you're really really worried can you call the emergency vet just to describe what happened? I'm sure they'll say it's not imminently worrying and maybe (maybe) to take him tomorrow. He might have just eaten something funky on a walk?

Try not to panic.
Is he asleep now and looking comfortable?
It might be nothing, my cat keeps eating grass from a very specific spot and she was sick once from it, she's fine just a dope.
If he's sick in the morning phone the vet.
Hooefully it will be nothing but you're not stupid or anything else for being worried, pets are family members its natural to be worried if one is sick.

I am not a medical expert and have not had anxiety attacks myself. But didn't want to read or run.
If you were my friend or family member I would tell you to distract yourself. Read a book. Watch a tv programme. Play a game. Have a drink. Take your mind off focusing on your dog. Look around the room. Remind yourself you are safe and warm. Breath in for 5 and out for 5. You seem to focus on the anxiety and needing help to calm down and not that the dog is seriously sick. So I am assuming somewhere deep down you know the dog is not seriously unwell. Otherwise your post would be titled. Help my dog is unwell. If that makes sense and I have picked it up right? Sorry if that's no help. Be kind to you. Your inner voice is important. Think positive things. Was the dog eating/drinking/playing normally yesterday? Remind yourself of that if he was.

My dog was sick 4 or 5 times through the night last week. Absolutely no idea what caused it. I just didn't give her anything to eat until the following evening and then gave her scrambled eggs. She was fine.
I know it is a huge worry when your best friend is poorly but I'm sure he will be ok too.
I would just give him something really bland to eat after the sickness has stopped.
Ring your vet on Monday if he's still poorly.
Please try and stay calm, take deep breaths and try to relax. I know anxiety can be crippling. Did you counsellor give you any coping strategies?

Hi lovely I suffer with quite bad anxiety too, and I have two dogs. So long as he's calm and sleeping now and he has access to cold water he is okay. You're a lovely person who cares a lot about her dog but just take some big deep breaths (sounds silly but in for 4 out for 8, focusing on that really helps). Once you're more level, keep doing it if the panic starts rising. I sometimes find I need a huge distraction so I'll watch a couple of videos on YouTube or pop some relaxing music on. It will pass, and your dog is safe and warm in bed with you keep talking if its a good distraction x

Hi op, I’ve suffered with anxiety for many years too and am also medicated.
I am also diagnosed with OCD which can bring me unwanted/intrusive thoughts so I do understand how horrible you’re feeling.

Your dog has probably ate something a bit dodgy and needed to get it up and out. Sleep is the best place for him and right beside you too. No doubt his favourite place?

Everything seems a million times worse in the middle of the night, all is dark and quiet and nobody is around to help.
Try some distraction methods. Go and make a nice cup of tea/coffee. Listen to some meditation, remind yourself that this is your anxiety and not you and then try and get some rest.

Come back tomorrow if possible and let us know how you got on.
Hope you’re ok

Thanks. Yes it is my anxiety more than anything else. I went through a stage when I first started seeking help where I would take him to the vet for everything, even the vet would tell me there was nothing wrong and I wouldn't believe it. It really caused some issues with me and DH and I saw my counsellor and things had been getting better but tonight has just brought it all back up again. I know logically he's probably okay but I still can't stop myself from worrying that he's not, that I'll wake up and he'll have stopped breathing in the night.

We've had quite a few pregnancy losses some at later stages which is what triggered this whole thing off.

He's all I have but I feel like he's just going to die as well.

He's fast asleep now in bed with me. I can't help myself but to keep checking his chest is going up and down.

Window is open and trying to take deep breaths, thank you.

Hi sorry you're going through this - anxiety is such a bastard - if your dog is settled on the bed with you he must be feeling better - just get through each 5 minutes at a time - can you regulate your breathing to his? Always make me feel calmer - hugs to you both 💚

@HelpPleaseAnx you poor thing sound like you have really been through the mill. Just keep your breathing . Your dog will be ok . Try get some sleep and know that if he is still being sick in the morning you can take him to an emergency vet. But no doubt he will be bouncing about as normal and you will wonder if he was the same dog being sick . I know it's not easy OP. Especially at this time of night when all our fears are magnified . The sun will be up soon.

I've got an audio book I think I'll try to distract myself with thank you.

One of my main things I discuss with my counsellor is how I always need reassurance from other people. Tonight I've used you for that! So thank you. I feel better just from putting it down in words.

Sounds daft but my mum is the perfect tonic usually (not at 3:30am though!) I usually use her for this and she tells me to 'get a grip, he's absolutely fine' and it works, it makes me feel so much better just hearing someone else tell me how ridiculous I'm being if that makes sense?

Try not to worry, he seems okay and is sleeping. My lab was sick loads of times, few years ago. Took him to the vets and he thought he had IBS, changed his food and has been fine ever since. Only sick a couple of times, only because he eats something stupid like socks.

Give your vet a ring Monday.

Was the dog eating/drinking/playing normally yesterday?

Yes, I sent my mum a video of him playing all hyper and happy at about 10pm so it's literally in the last few hours he's been ill, which is reassuring.

Just think humans can randomly be sick and then be fine and sometimes it's totally random. So it can happen to dogs too.

It's just so annoying. Like I know now that I've calmed down a little that the most logical reason is probably that he's just got a bit of an off tummy like we all get. But when it's happening my mind goes straight to the worst case scenarios and I cannot stop myself I just think 'this is it, he's dying, I told you all he would and now he is'.

I can't trust my own brain. And I think how would I ever cope with a child if I'm like this over my dog throwing up!

My DH is like your mum, he finds it very hard to be irrational and my anxiety is irrational. So for example I'll panic that if I leave DD with him to nap or go to the supermarket, something bad will happen, and I have a panic attack about that. He doesn't beat around the bush, he says, "she's asleep, you haven't had any sleep/a break for days, she's fed and changed, you're okay and she will be fine", he's so logical about it and so sure he's right, which of course he is, that it helps to level me. It really does sound like you've been through the mill, be kind to yourself. An audio book sounds perfect to help you relax

Fairy, it really helps doesn't it! I think some people may think it's rude or not understanding but for whatever reason it's exactly what I need. I come away from my conversations with her thinking 'why the hell was I being so silly?!'

Watch that video of him playing happily. Bet it shows a picture of health. Glad you are feeling a bit calmer from the responses. Enjoy your book. I am sure he/she will be just fine. And u will be too.

@HelpPleaseAnx do you know what you will cope when you have a child and you will be a fantastic parent. It's your brain playing tricks on you . Hopefully your counseling will continue when all this is over and you will be beat this. I never thought I would be a year off having my last panic attack but here I am. Thinking about you and know you are not alone .

I'm exactly the same if someone was to pander to me about it, it would reinforce the idea if that makes sense? As if they're giving some credence to it, so it could happen, then it makes it worse because I'm like oh no, they agree with me, I must have a point, something bad will happen.

Fairy, yes me too! I cannot read Google because it's just all too much, if he even had a single symptom of something serious I'd be a mess.

I explained it to my counsellor like I feel I've gone backwards into an almost child like state when it comes to making decisions/being confident in my own thoughts. I have to have back up from someone else before I will accept anything and at the moment it's mainly from my parents (I'm a grown woman!). I have to message or call them about everything to get their opinion or say so before I can be happy with it. Almost like I don't want the responsibility of having control over my own life anymore so I want them to do it for me 😂

Thank you Peppa, it really means a lot.

I feel so much better now just from getting it all out of my head. He's sleeping soundly now

It think it's easier in a way if you allow other people to make the decisions because then if it goes wrong as you say, its not something you have responsibility for. But honestly it sounds like you're really trying to get past it and it will come, it takes time! Our brains don't always want to work with us which really isn't helpful 😂

Cross posted, I'm glad this has helped and he's sleeping better now! I hope you now manage to get some rest, you deserve it

Thank you all so much for helping me last night! I managed a couple of hours.

And lo and behold here is the mischief maker himself all waggy tailed and perfectly fine!!