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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Poll on if you would send your (primary) aged dc back to school on 11/5

490 replies

THATscurryfungeBITCH · 16/04/2020 07:35

Would you be happy to send your primary aged dc back to school on 11th May?

Yes - YABU
No - YANBU

OP posts:
onlyreadingneverposting8 · 16/04/2020 08:18

No. Looking at other countries social distancing will need to be in place and I wouldn't want to subject younger children to that on a daily basis. Secondary schools could simply not do social distancing and therefore wouldn't go back anyway.
I home Ed some of my children anyway due to sen so I'm not wedded to the schools being open.
I support teachers and other teaching support staff to be able to protect themselves and don't see why they should be put at risk.

Astrid84 · 16/04/2020 08:19

Absolutely yes and had I the choice I would sent my DD to school through this. I don't depend on school for childcare however I am a key worker My DD is 11 and going to high school after summer and school at any age is critical to a child's development. She misses her friends, the routine, she may miss out on school dance (which in her eyes is a big thing) these last few months of primary are to help her transition out of primary school life and into high school which at the best of times is difficult nevermind without that transition period.

I totally understand parents needing to shield their child if the child themselves is considered high risk or indeed anyone in the household however, there is no excuse otherwise not to send your child back to school. This virus isn't going away it's just another virus that will just make its rounds each year

RicStar · 16/04/2020 08:19

I would send them at the moment- I think we have to stop putting everything on hold, and start adapting where we can - I feel this risk is going to be around for a long time. For young children going to school is so important and can not be re created at home, and the risk to them is low. I think it would be feasible to reduce pick up / drop off risk with some planning.

WtfIsThisEven · 16/04/2020 08:21

Yes. My kids are suffering, my teenager is depressed, and I have no ability to homeschool them. I imagine our online school program will only run as long as schools are actually closed.

WanderingMilly · 16/04/2020 08:21

No way, May is far, far too early. I no longer have small children (mine all grown up) but I work in a non-teaching capacity in a school. It's impossible as it is to stop small children passing on coughs and colds and the virus will still be around by May. We are 'behind' many European countries in our 'peak' timescale, and our lockdown hasn't been as severe as in some, and therefore I think we'll undo all the good so far if schools go back too early.

I also think that when we start to ease back into normality, it should be slowly. Secondary schools should go back first as it's easier to segregate older youngsters, teach about social distancing and maintain cleanliness rules.

Primary schools should be much later. It isn't the pupils themselves who are so much at risk but the fact they may be carrying in virus from outside the school and/or passing it on to adult workers, teachers, cleaners, admin and other staff who will then take the virus out into their own families and communities again. Or the other way around, of course.

I would also want - in an ideal world - proper PPE for all workers in the school and for proper testing to be available. I can't imagine how it would work otherwise. I myself have had an odd illness...high temperature, aches and pains, red eyes, but only a small amount of coughing. I had it, took to my bed it was so bad, recovered; the following week I had the same symptoms reoccurring.

No idea if it was the virus or something else. Would I test positive or negative? Am I still positive? Would you want me to be dealing with your child when I don't even know? The whole thing is ridiculous and dangerous in my opinion.....

Sirzy · 16/04/2020 08:21

Everyone knows the risk is going to be around for a long time however we need to as much as possible control the spread and pace of spread to ensure services can cope.

Shehz21 · 16/04/2020 08:23

Yes.

Angel2702 · 16/04/2020 08:23

Yes the virus is here until a vaccine. If we wait until September the unavoidable wave of cases will come at start of flu season. If they go back for a few weeks before summer holidays they will hopefully reduce the cases occurring in Autumn / winter.

duffeldaisy · 16/04/2020 08:24

Definitely not. That would be far too early. If it's being suggested seriously, is that just a way of trying to get another lot of people infected so that they get it over with before flu season later in the year?

It'd be a huge risk to teachers, to other staff, to the whole community when numbers of deaths are still high.

I'm anxious enough about them going back in September tbh.

OddshoesOddsocks · 16/04/2020 08:26

No, mine wouldn’t but then I have no NEED for them to go.

Currently on maternity leave so in a fortunate position that I don’t need to work also will have a newborn by then so wouldn’t want to risk her.
I felt very uncomfortable sending dcs those final few days before closure and think I would if I wasn’t convinced that they hadn’t reopened too early.

And I am NOT the natural SAHM type!

I think maybe reopen for those who need it, as pp said, this can’t go on forever and people need to get back to work but make it a choice without punishment for the time being, maybe til September to see if things are a little more calm and clear.

But then is it fair to ask teachers to cater for both in school and distance learning on a larger scale?

Thank goodness I’m not in charge...

HoffiCoffi13 · 16/04/2020 08:28

I’ve said yes, but actually I don’t think it’s a decision I’d make until I knew the situation at that time.
Also it’s irrelevant, as they’re unlikely to open fully on the 11th May.
The government will confirm a 3 week lockdown extension today. Like the last one, that means the situation will be reviewed in three weeks. It does not mean lockdown will be lifted in three weeks. And when restrictions are lifted, it will be gradually. Not a blanket ‘everyone go back to normal now’.

hopeishere · 16/04/2020 08:29

I don't know. DH is vulnerable so I'm very worried that even though the DC would be ok he would be a huge risk.

I don't get the rush. For example my friend
has a shop so even if the school was open she might not be able to open the shop. Same with hairdressers / bars / restaurants and other services.

HouseTornado · 16/04/2020 08:29

Yes.

Mawbags · 16/04/2020 08:30

My children won't be going back til September

Luckily I don't work and they're raging introverts so i appreciated I have it really easy here. If my jon depended on it, I'd have to send them in

GabriellaMontez · 16/04/2020 08:31

Yes but if one of was at risk I'd probably feel different.

This assumes things follow similar trends.

ofwarren · 16/04/2020 08:31

No. My son is in the shielded group so definitely not going back to school just yet.

underneaththeash · 16/04/2020 08:33

I would too, I would prefer the secondaries to open too as soon as possible. All my children are very low risk as are DH and I. The risk of them or us getting severely ill is extremely low.

I do think though if parents choose not to send their children in they should not be penalised.

Gmom · 16/04/2020 08:33

Yes. I would send them. My kids are healthy and as children they are low risk. My husband and I are healthy. We can easily avoid public transportation, the grandparents, gatherings and the grocery store etc. so that we don’t spread Covid if we get it. (We haven’t been shopping since the 23rd March). I want the kids to have as normal a childhood as possible and being in our house for an entire school term is not normal. I think they need to be with other kids. Zoom and House Party etc. is not the same.

DressesWithPocketsRockMyWorld · 16/04/2020 08:35

No. But if my work opens fully again (SEN school) then I will have no choice.

BreatheAndFocus · 16/04/2020 08:36

No - far too early.

The majority of teachers are women, who are lower risk, often younger (20s to 50s). Low risk

Those women could have diabetes, asthma, be pregnant, etc Just because someone is young and looks healthy doesn’t mean they don’t have underlying conditions. In addition, many teachers could have family members that are very vulnerable.

897654321abcvrufhfgg · 16/04/2020 08:36

After half term would work. I think 50% of each class in at a time mornings/afternoons ( so each child in 1/2 day everyday) teachers can then just cover English and maths maybe. I say this as someone who works in a school. Social distancing at break through organised supervised games and staggered breaks and then children home for lunch. It will be a nightmare for schools to organise but I feel that it would be a great way of testing the waters and creating a second outbreak in time for summer hols

DeborahAlisonphillipa · 16/04/2020 08:39

Yes. From the information available the risks are very low in terms of 1) them becoming infected and then lower again that 2) it would be a serious illness for them. we all have to risk assess daily: should we drive our kids somewhere all there is a risk of an RTA? Further, it’s not the case that keeping them at harm is without any risks or disadvantages i.e. to their well-being, to their education, their sense of normality and security, development etc. As with everything we need to weigh up the information available and make a decision proportionate to the relative risks

User202004 · 16/04/2020 08:39

Why is this a question? When schools are open you send your children. Since when do parents get to choose? The only parents who should be allowed to choose is parents of children with health concerns, I can't believe how many people would keep children off for grandparents. Some people are so flippant about education, keep grandparents away.

AuditAngel · 16/04/2020 08:40

My husband is furloughed, I am currently WFH, and can actually WFH about 90% of the time anyway.

My oldest was meant to be sitting GCSE’s, so he won’t go back. DD1 is in year 8, she misses school, but is working really hard at home. DD2 is really missing the social side, but has asthma, so I need to make an assessment for her, based on the situation at the time.

Care for her is not an issue as I can be here most of the time, DH works shifts so often here if I’m not, plus DS will happily mind her anyway.

THATscurryfungeBITCH · 16/04/2020 08:40

But even doing half days you are having all those parents stood about at pick up / drop off

I do hope there will not be penalties if it does happen and people choose not to send dc in

What do people think about nursery age dc?

OP posts: