AIBU to lie to friend about her illustrations?

[JemimaPyjamas]

A friend is an illustrator, but in my opinion, not a very good or talented one - her drawings, usually of animals in clothes, are quite flat and extremely twee. She has mentioned previously that her business isn't doing well but she is determined to make it work regardless (and I think her parents are helping out a bit with the finances.) In the five years I have known her, she has been doing the same style but has now written a children's book, also in the same style...

I have been sent a copy to read, and also some cards that are in the same style and, very excited, she wants me to say what I think.

I like her a lot but we are not super close, and I am not a fellow illustrator or anything that would qualify me, in her view, to give an informed opinion (I do have 'a' level art though but she doesn't know that!!) I suspect she wants reassurance and praise rather than anything else.

I'm going to have to lie and say something bland like it's 'nice' aren't I...?

AIBU to lie and say what she wants to hear (or at least along those lines)

ANBU to tell her that it's not very good

If it's horribly twee pictures of animals in clothes they'll probably sell well as birthday cards, the kind with rhymes inside - look at all the twee crap in the shops. There are lots of people with bad taste out there!

Yup. Tend to agree with this.

It is quite often ‘in the eye of the beholder’, surely?

“Oh these are lovely, I bet they took ages, I love the colours”
😬 see, that’s not so hard is it?

Thing is, everyone has different taste. So you may not like it, but other people might. If you are a friend, I would just say nice things, but not too overly. Like when someone had a hair cut or new dress, you naturally compliment even you don't think it looks great, don't you?
Different story if you are qualified to give her a constructive criticism. Otherwise, I would just be nice.

If she’s on Mumsnet she knows now!

Maybe tell her that you know nothing about such things, but ash she’s so passionate about it perhaps she should go to someone who does - ie commercial artists, etc for their opinion? (Takes all responsibility out of your hands!) Maybe even suggest that if it isn’t going well, maybe she do some courses to update her design skills and motivate new passions and ideas?

My friend makes boring illustrations on tea towels, she also sells a LOT of tea towels. So much so she rents a space on the south bank. I wouldn't buy one and even being objective I don't 'get' it. The style is the same on them all. So be supportive some might be better than others, if she asks you if you think she'll be successful then say you don't know. I get that you're concerned about her but there is nothing worse than a friend raining on your parade and she might be a success

You only have a personal opinion to offer, nothing more. You don't know why she's struggling. It could be absolutely nothing to do with her style of drawing. There's deficiently a market for "twee" stuff, so that's not likely to be it.

You have nothing to gain in giving negative feeback, and a friendship to lose if you do.

Also - I used to head sales for an artist, who had a huge audience and many followers. I hated her designs. Everyone is different.

The price that is printed on a little card beside a painting is a hopeful invitation. It's not what the painting actually goes for!

I didn’t know that sarahandquack. Thanks. So when this is all over and if I see something I like, I should offer what I think is a more reasonable price!!

Nod and smile. Don’t give her feedback - illustrating is too personal and she obviously likes it. As a PP said I would probably just say they were lovely but I couldn’t suggest how to improve them and that someone more qualified in this field would be in a better position to comment.

You’re her friend. Unless you have neglected to mention that you’re also in the world of children’s books, retail or another professional sphere that could help her, your opinion is basically absolutely worthless.

Sorry. But it’s true!

Being kind won’t offer ‘false hope’ if that’s what you’re worried about - a professional who can help her get ahead will respond or not regardless of your opinion on your friend’s work if she decides to send it to them.

So be nice. Tell the truth but be nice. Ask questions to avoid being direct about your actual (negative) opinion.

“Thanks for showing me your work - I’m really flattered. Not sure my opinion counts much, though! I liked [X - where X is something you can say something/anything nice]. What are you planning to do next - send them to agents, or direct to publishers? Were you thinking of self-publishing? I don’t know much about that world but will have a think and see if I know anyone who could advise.”

I'd employ the THINK acronym with this one. Think up everything you'd like to say and then change or omit all sections that don't meet the criteria (true, helpful, inspiring, necessary, kind).

"I can certainly see how these appeal to so many people! So you need to get the word out - is it worth seeing if there are any marketing courses about so a wider selection of people see them?"

@nettie434 - YY, do! Asking 'is the price firm' is a polite way to do it. Sometimes it is, to be fair. But often it isn't!

Is your friend a full time illustrator?

Did she train at uni?

My daughter went to Falmouth University to study illustration. We went to the annual exhibition where every student's work was shown. I didn't see any that were terrible, although the styles varied enormously and I didn't like all of them. I imagine most will have an audience waiting out there who love what they produce. You could tell the ones who would be sought after though and many went on to great things.

It's very, very difficult to make a living as a full time artist. My daughter has had 3 books published in the US, but still needs a full time job to pay the bills. She could probably throw herself in to doing more illustration, but her personality means that she likes the security of a wage every month.

You not liking the style isn't the same aa them being bad or her lacking a talent though surely? A-level art doesn't really qualify anyone for anything much, let's face it (yes, I have one). I think it would be a bit embarrassing to say you're legitimately placed to give 'constructive' criticism because you did an A-level once. If you feel the need to tell her it's not for you then do so but what does that contribute?

Just be supportive, ask her if she's had any feedback or sent the work to other illustrators or publishers and got any response instead. Direct her to Etsy selling or Instagram if she hasn't expanded to this , lots of people making money on both selling what sounds to be similar work. Some people like things which are naive in their execution. I would be focusing more on supporting a friend trying to support herself with a business, not my personal thoughts on what might sell.