To think our new normal could be a better way of life?

[Wehttam]

Ok first of all, hear me out. Maybe this is hypothetical fantasy but I think it has merit.

As we are adjusting to Lockdown and both its benefits and disadvantages, I have started thinking about how civilisation may be able to use this as a starting point for a new way of life, accepting the previous 24/7 have it all lifestyle is fundamentally poisonous to our wellbeing.

I fully understand this is a global pandemic and is catastrophic for many people, losing loved ones, suffering illness and the fear of how this could potentially affect many people’s lives going forward economically is a worry no one wants or needs, I am not minimising this nor am I advocating for blanket suffering or pain before you come for me.

Environmentally this is momentarily allowing the planet to slowly recover from one of its biggest problems, Us. Look outside, the air is cleaner already, the noise we had so become used to has quietened, our frantic pace of living has slowed, for most of us this will have untold health benefits as well as benefits to nature we will see manifest further over the coming weeks.

I fully appreciate how for many people this is an uncertain time, those suffering DV or poverty are living in hell, the situation right now is unpeeling the veneer society generally paints over these problems though. What if our new reality was to help those who are vulnerable and suffering but still maintain this level of calm muted living.

Excessive commuting, over consumption of single use anything, traffic everywhere, takeaways, shops, bars clubs, restaurants catering for every niche or whim, flying everywhere incessantly, worrying about having he latest this or that, which all means sweet FA at the moment. What it all boils down to is all of that was needless to actually live and breathe properly wasn’t it?

Eventually once Lockdown starts to be lifted, are you willing to go back to that chaos the outside world had become? I’m not so sure I am and I dont think it will be any good for those who do. Thoughts?

Kind of agree but I think I'll eat out as much as I did before, maybe do things even more as we realise we are lucky to be able to. I think work commutes will go down as more work from home which is great

I personally think society as a whole will have missed a huge opportunity if we just go back to living the way we were before. The world was a mess. Too many people were stressed, overworked and depressed. We were consuming too much needlessly and living a hectic life with no time to stop and take the time to appreciate living. Many were relying on other people to look after their children for most of their waking time and therefore missing out on getting to know and shape their own offspring. The way a lot of people lived seemed to be centred around money, instant gratification and likes on social media. Not to mention the damage we were doing to the environment. I've felt unsettled for a long time, feeling that the world was going crazy and as much as I want the coronavirus to do one, I am worried that once it does hopefully go away everyone will go straight back to their normal crazy pace.

Well, I was happy before and it’s a fucking nightmare now so no patronising crap

'the poem by Kitty O’meara is self indulgent guff'

This. It's not a poem, either.

Among things gone from my life for the time being are church services, choir rehearsals, classical concerts. I'm wondering whether a wonderful (and affordable) summer course my older children have been doing for the last few years, and that they love, will be able to go ahead. Going on about pubs and restaurants as consumption-centred fripperies neglects the community aspect of a shared drink, a shared meal. It's things like this that have gone too, for now. Not just the big stores, the small creative independent shops.

And this sort of pious talk from a PP: 'Many were relying on other people to look after their children for most of their waking time and therefore missing out on getting to know and shape their own offspring. The way a lot of people lived seemed to be centred around money, instant gratification and likes on social media.' turns my stomach, frankly. Accusing people working all the hours under the sun in order to keep some kind of secure home in the dreadful UK housing system of not knowing their own children. And to my mind the virtue-signalling 'today we made our own biofuel plant out of reclaimed macrame' lot are no less after 'likes' than anyone else.

Yeah it's bullshit of the kind where ivory towered hippy-dom brushes its fringed skirt against semi-eugenic environmental absolutism and therefore not only fucking annoying but also shades of sinister. 100000 dead isn't healing fuck all.

Oh absolutely There will be those that continue their hectic stressful lives styles. Some yes out of enjoyment but also those aren’t happy but for whatever reason cannot broach the subject.

Many stay at home parents who were adamant they will never work, may find themselves looking for work.

Things will never be able to back to the way things were. Those days are gone. Just ask anyone who has lived through any live changing event.

.

That poem was fake news btw.

I think there’ll be a class divide in how this is remembered.

MC people in office jobs living in houses with gardens are getting to avoid the commute, more family time, less pressure to ferry dcs to lots of activities, enjoy the garden and family time and will have the power to demand wfh as a norm once this is over.

WC people have been imprisoned in flats, scolded for going to parks, not been able to stock up in food, are more likely to be made redundant after this.

It will create even more of a wealth divide than before.

But I think if we could adjust to a slower pace of life that would be good.

We do not need cafes/ restaurants/ leisure centres etc as said above to drive our economy.

We need a basic income to drive entrepreneurship and give everyone a safety net.

I doubt it but one thing I really hope for is that people will radically change their diet and become healthier and fitter. This has clearly demonstrated a healthier body has better chances of fighting the virus.
I don’t mean quinoa and vegetarianism. I mean proper healthy, moderate diet. No more shit like crisps and biscuits and fats.

I'm now trying to do uni from home with 2 kids underfoot. It's incredibly difficult to do the work and take it all in with constant distractions and interruptions.

I'm lucky that I'm on furlough from my job in a fast food restaurant so bringing home a massive £155 a week for the moment, hoping that I'll still have a job when this is over.

My DH and I parted ways last week and I'm a ball of anxiety about the future, the kids and I darent call anyone to talk about it in case the kids hear me in my tiny house.

Its all a bit much and I'm literally just trying to get through the days, nothing more than that.

I can't wait to get back to uni and work and friends and family and work out how my life will be going forward. I have no desire to live like this long term at all.

I apologise for the clumsy wording in my last post and that it sounds patronising, it is my opinion and wasn't meant to offence. I'd like to clarify that I don't for a second think parents are at fault if they have to work so much they can't see their children very much, it's the fault of society. Of course they know their children and are brilliant parents. It's just such a shame that they can't spend more time together in usual circumstances, it takes a situation like this to get families to spend more time together.

The 'poem' wasnt fake news.

Although there was apparently a false claim that it was written a long time ago.

I don’t know about the whole population but there are things we will definitely be doing different as a family. Stopping eating out as much, and reducing the amount of indoor activities we take the kids to, Often we’ll take them to soft play, spend £50/£60 there whilst everyone eats. This has taught me that actually they much prefer being outdoors, and having a picnic which costs £15/£20 tops

Just look back in history both distant and recent. Spanish Flu. London fire. Titanic, when the market crashed in the 80’s and there are still those that never recovered. Home owners lost their homes and have never been afford to buy again. Instead living in one of estates a lot despise and until a few weeks ago working minimum wage. Oh some did okay, they are now working behind the tills.

Nothing wrong with any of those jobs btw. Like everywhere can be fantastic places to work.

Homeless will increase. Trying to get help as a jobless single person, haven’t got a hope. They never did before, with or with mh or some other health reason. Cos there was no room. The single people in those shared houses, homeless because the owner had to sell. Maybe not straight away, but their costs will increase as the mortgage rates rise to pay for this.

'where ivory towered hippy-dom brushes its fringed skirt against semi-eugenic environmental absolutism'

Brilliant!

@Devlesko Have another read of my post and see if you get my point on a second reading. If 70% of us are meant to catch the virus, to achieve herd immunity which will protect the very vulnerable, then that 70% are going to have to go outside again, slowly. Now, social distancing is required to ensure that we don't all get it at once. Not to ensure that one of us get it. That's not the point of this social distancing. The next step, the exit strategy, is to loosen those controls so that the next set of people can catch it and we can build up herd immunity gradually. The next step requires people to stop social distancing and go out again. As I'm not classed as vulnerable, I'm supposed to catch the virus. In future, it won't be "stay home save lives"; at some point, for the herd immunity strategy to work, more people will have to go out and become immune by catching it.

Thank you for your apology, pipnchops - the proximity of your comment to the stuff about things revolving around money did make it seem rather an invective against the careerist mother. (I'm not in that position; I work FH for myself in a well-paid and interesting specialism that is unaffected by the current situation, so it wasn't that I was personally stung by what you said).

I'm now trying to do uni from home with 2 kids underfoot. It's incredibly difficult to do the work and take it all in with constant distractions and interruptions

No different to the reality faced before Clovid-19. And many having to work on top of this.

There’s loads and loads of groups going back years with really helpful tips and advice how to do it.

Don’t get too involved in reading the why’s. It can be hard reading.

@ravenmum

This is assuming that people will get immunity if they get the virus, there's no proof yet that there is any immunity.

Maybe Boris could volunteer to get it again seeing as he's recovered so well 👀

I want to return to choice.
I want to decide to see my grandchildren.
I want to go to the supermarket and choose my fruit.
I want to go for a drive to the sea or the mountains.
I want to go to church.
I am 76, dh is 83, and we would like to choose to have some more little adventures.
To facilitate that we choose to stay at home.
We choose phone and video calls over visits.
The car is staying on the drive.
The apples are chosen and delivered .
We choose the chance of life.

I hope, optimistically, that the global effort we'll need to eradicate this virus will give us a good framework for getting on top of climate change. So that's optimistic.

But on a personal level: God no I hope this doesn't last. I hate this. I am glad for you if your frantic pace of life has slowed, OP, really I am, but for many of us the pace of life has got a whole lot more frantic. I have a nice house and a garden and a loving family and I can wfh so I'm definitely one of the lucky ones here, and still, life becomes about 300% busier and more stressful than it was before when you have two parents trying to work full time with small stressed bored children around.

Glad I'm not the only one who really disliked that Kitty O'Meara poem.

I'm worried for my family, hoping we all stay safe and can see each other again. I'm horrified for all the people that this has taken, and so sad for the families who will have to live a different life without them. I'm worried for the people that lockdown has made life more difficult for, people who are being abused or who now have no money and no safe place to be.

I however in my little bubble am quite settled with lockdown, we're so very fortunate that our days together have been enjoyable and that up until now we have been safe and well.

But I do feel that once, when/if, this is all over, people will say thank fuck for that, and go mad booking holidays, buying clothes, seeing friends, eating out, dancing, trampolining, swimming going to festivals - because either the threat has gone, we lived through that and it won't happen again in our lifetime, or - this could happen again at any time so now is for living life out of lockdown while we can!

Certainly not. I hate being cooped up in the house with people I can’t stand frankly.

I’m not convinced that everyone in an organisation working from home is a good thing- flexibility would be a good thing, perhaps a balance between wfh and in the office would be better.

I think building relationships with the people you work with does require spending time together, getting to know strengths and weaknesses (not just performance related ones)- when there are strong working relationships (not saying you have to be best friends) more is achieved and any problems more easily ironed out/compensated for. If you only ever see them in a video-conference or communicate via email or telephone, the relationship is superficial. It can also be isolating and lonely, though appreciate some people prefer lone working.

No, I want my old life back please.

@happinessischocolate Yes, it's all very much "fingers crossed".