To think this is not really in the spirit of things?

[tinkywinkyshandbag]

So my in-laws who are both in their 80s live about 20 minutes walk from our house. Pre-lockdown we would often get together with them on a Friday evening for a gin and tonic or glass of wine.

Since lockdown we haven't seen them apart from briefly to drop off some shopping et cetera and we have been strict about maintaining social distance.

I know my mother-in-law has found a lockdown down hard as she is very sociable and it took us a few weeks to convince her that she had to take it seriously.

Anyway, this evening my DH and our 15-year-old daughter went off for a walk for their daily exercise, fair enough. At the same time or 18-year-old daughter took yourself out for a run, again fair enough.

About half an hour later the phone rang and it was my mother-in-law. It seems that my husband and daughter had magically just arrived at their house, our other daughter was on her way, and the plan was for them all to stand out in the street and have a drink and a chat. By drink I mean bottle of wine et cetera.

I was invited over to join them. mulled it over and then called back to say that I wouldn't join them, to a somewhat frosty reception, They clearly thought I was being a bit of a killjoy.

However I don't think this is really in the spirit of the lockdown. We live in a very touristy area and there has been a lot of publicity about keeping the tourists away and everybody staying at home. I think that I was all standing out in the street drinking wine and having a laugh is not really the thing to do in this situation. Even if social distance is maintained, it still doesn't sit right with me.

I am now expecting that when they eventually get home I will get stick from DH about being antisocial. However I think I am in the right. AIBU?

That comment about killing nhs staff was outrageous. Maybe the government allowing mass gatherings to continue long after people started dying should carry some of that responsibility. And still allowing flights in and out of the coutry with no checks on where people go after they leave the airport. But no let's just call people murderers if they stand 12 feet away from their granny. We're being played. The govt fucked this up and they're getting away with it because we're too busy accusing each other..

If they all observed social distancing, nobody made a special trip to go there (ie they were out anyway on their exercise or whatever), nobody drove miles unnecessarily and everyone washed their hands when they got in, I don't see the issue. I see similar where I live often - everyone keeps well apart, far more so than at the supermarket, say.

Also, YABU to refer to 'the spirit of the lockdown'. What does that even mean?!

Its the lying that would bother me more. Everyone in a little secret plan which they knew you'd disagree with and then expecting you to give over at the last minute. That's really horrible for me.

@Bluebell246 well said!

and have made clear it shouldn't happen again which DH understood the reasons for.

I bet he just agreed to escape an argument. He'll make sure it's not mentioned next time. OP you cannot control your family members. If you don't want to go then fine but you sound very difficult.

If loads of people did this, standing outside houses on the street it would make it hard for those who are genuinely exercising or walking to the shop to get past people.

It’s silly. Why can’t people use Skype, etc.

I think it’s ok providing they are on private property, outside and observe social distancing.

I live on a street of terraces. Last Friday about 20 of us exited our houses, glasses of booze in hand and proceeded to have a socially-distanced hour or so of chat and catching up with our neighbours. I note that the police didn’t break up a far larger gathering on a street yesterday which went on for much longer.

My daughter (a uni student) is working in the small Tesco on the high street. She says social distancing is very difficult because of the size of the store. But the government allows it to be open. People need to use their common sense about how to behave in lockdown not blindly follow the rules and rant at others for so-called irresponsible behaviour. Much of the rest of Europe is beginning to ease lockdown now. We will have to soon or the social and economic cost will be enormous. I don’t think your family did anything wrong BTW.

I agree with you Hilde

I think if driving to your elderly parent's house and sitting ten feet away in the garden for a chat while they sit at the kitchen door is going to stop them from being depressed and lonely then it's perfectly fine. After all, they are having shopping etc brought to them, previously handled by God knows who, they still have post put through the letter box handled by God knows who.

I think some common sense needs to be applied and risk properly evaluated.