Jumping the queue possibly because you're a teacher?

[triedandtestedteacher]

So today I had to take my dd6 with me to the shops. We both donned masks to go. There were two shops next to each other. One with a queue of about 6 people and one with about 2. We joined the longer queue and got to third in the queue with about 3 people behind us when this woman came up and just hopped in front of me. At first I wondered whether she was queuing for the adjacent shop but she was standing very close to the last woman in front ( everyone else was at least 2 metres apart) and looking round furtively because she knew she'd jumped in. My dd who is very ...well 6 started pulling at me and going on and on about how she's pushed in and asking why etc. So I say to the woman 'excuse me? Are you queuing for x shop or x shop' to which she replied that she was queuing for the shop that I was queuing for. I told her that there was a queue and she'd jumped in. Next news her rather large husband appeared and informed me I was pathetic and to go in ahead if I was so bothered. I then said that there was actually at least 3 people she'd jumped in front of. The woman then started ranting at me that I was setting a bad example to my dd to be so rude? I replied that no I was showing her that sometimes you have to call people out when they're being rude and inconsiderate. Unfortunately a shopper two people back shouted 'do we really need this? Isn't there more important things? Anyway you've got a kid with you, shouldn't be out'. The women who had pushed in then repeated how rude and pathetic I was and followed it up with 'I'm a teacher'. Now I'm not sure what she thought the relevance of that was. That she should get priority queuing or that she had a right to tell me how to behave in front of my dd because she was a teacher? I didn't get to ask her because she was then allowed into the shop leaving me to fume outside at the audacity of the woman. I'm a teacher myself but wouldn't attempt to use it to win a disagreement. AIBU? Would you have said anything?

I'm pregnant and been spotting for about a week You should not be standing in queues and putting yourself under this strain.

@derxa I know but I had a few miscarriages before and done bed rest to no avail. I just feel like I need to keep busy but yes I could have done without getting that upset and stressed out

They were both total knobs. Being a teacher gives her no right whatsoever to push in. Her job is totally irrelevant. Both dh and myself are teachers and would never behave like this. I’m pleased you said something. She should have just waited just like everyone else.

The point about “bigger things to worry about” is an excellent one. I would honestly challenge anyone who pulled that line. If the queue is so insignificant compared to the issue of covid19 then Mr and Mrs Knobhead should have been just as happy to wait in it.

Sorry that happened to you OP, she was rude, aggressive, and the one in the wrong. I have noticed that sometimes when you call people out on their bad behaviour they try and turn it around - guess they're so entitled they're not used to being called out. I was once in similar situation (not Coronavirus related) - queuing and a lady just tried to push past everyone to the front. Everyone behind just seemed to have ignored but I said 'excuse me there's a queue, wait your turn'. She tried to argue why she should be allowed to but because I was having none of it she then just resorted to chuntering about how rude I was, and they'd been up to that there London and all day not one person had been rude (as if they expected it) until me. It's rude to push in! Not to ask someone not to! Grrrr.

This wasn't an attempt at priority entry, this was basic cheeky fkr queue jumping. Why should you spend longer in an already stressful environment than this special snowflake?

I'd certainly remonstrate. I'd certainly not have a problem doing so if I had a child with me and would see it as a lesson in fairness.

Yanbu at all.
I’m fuming on your behalf.
And I can’t stand the ‘go in front if you’re so bothered’ used by queue jumpers. Like they are being oh so reasonable and you’re uptight for saying something.
I am generally quite a chilled person but I would have been wishing nasty diseases on them.

Ah, the token peacemaker was there... These are almost worse than the CFers.

I would have been livid! I would have said I would ask one of your students to teach you about manners as you certainly haven’t any!!! Then told her heavy weight parter to do one!!

You did the right thing. Next time, tell em you’re a doctor.

Cheeky bastards.

@Shopkinsdoll believe me there was a whole lot more I could have said. If she hadn't gone into the shop along with her bully of a husband I'd have told her what was what. I briefly considered hunting her down once inside but needed to keep an eye on dd

Tbh I'm monitoring the local fb page. It's such a small town I wouldn't be surprised if someone doesn't post about the 'unnecessary argument' outside of x shop.

The argument was necessary especially if she was a teacher.

@triedandtestedteacher Yep I have spoken to a few people who saw this woman's comments, and they are verrrry pissed off. In fact, her 'friends' list has dropped from 555 to 539, so she has lost 16 facebook 'friends' today!

Sounds like she had a chip on her shoulder

Wow Helga - that even beats the OP's cheeky fucker!

Do you know who I am???????

Op, if it's any consolation I had a 'peacemaker' intervene in an argument I had once and it does make you feel like you were in the wrong.
What happened was, I was travelling home from a salsa class late enough at night approx. 10pm on a bus in London. The bus was fairly empty, and it was a long journey and I wanted to be on the top deck so that I could recognise when I was getting close to home, so I'd know when to get off, as I had never travelled the bus route before.
As you might imagine, the bus was pretty empty apart from one girl at the front of the bus and maybe a couple further back. So I sat also at the front of the top deck.
Next thing a man came up and sat beside me. Bear in mind there were probably 50 empty seats on the bus, and he chose to sit beside me. But I turned on my danger radar and said nothing. Then he started sort of hopping his knees and fidgeting with his fingers on his knees. AND THAT'S WHEN THE ROW STARTED.

So I tolerated it for about 30 seconds, again bear in mind, the time of night, the empty seats on the whole bus and that I was a lone female and he was male.

So I said 'I'm sorry, but you're making me uncomfortable, would you mind moving to another seat'. WELL he tore strips off me about HIS RIGHTS etc. This argument went on for about 30 seconds and I said - please just MOVE - THERE ARE 50 OTHER SEATS ON THE BUS, WHY DID YOU SIT HERE?

Guess what he said?

YOU ARE RACIST. YOU'RE RACIST. THIS IS RACISM.

Now genuinely, and I'm not kidding you that up until that point I hadn't even registered what colour he was, so it certainly wasn't racism. BUT Miss Has-to-stick-her-nose-in in the adjacent front seat goes 'JEEZ - LEAVE HIM ALONE - HE CAN SIT WHERE HE WANTS'.

So yes OP, I totally understand how you can pick a battle, but then get totally undermined by an uninvolved stranger. I felt like some sort of a deviant madwoman for a while, until I stewed over it (days) and realised that no - he had no good reason to sit beside me in an empty bus and I'm still convinced he had no good reason for doing it.

And I've a reason to feel fear from strange men (yes, it probably is what you're thinking), so I know I did nothing wrong.
I did tell my friends and we had a good laugh about it after the fact, but I genuinely felt scared and was hemmed in so to speak. But to be called a bloomin racist, when I hadn't even noticed his skin colour and then Miss Peacemaker intervening, made me genuinely feel like shit for days.

So don't let it worry you OP.

@Balmytissues you were totally right. Can't believe not only nobody said anything to him but someone stuck up for him. If I'd have seen a man sit next to a girl like that I'd have wanted to do something. He was clearly invading your personal space. I've been flashed on public transport before now. It's just terrible the way some people behave

@Balmytissues Thank you! And thanks to the other posters who thought that the CF in my post was out of order. I was a bit worried I'd be slated for criticising a carer They do a great job (most of them!) and I am not denying that. But this young woman has got such a cheek. And yes it really is a case of 'Do you know who I am?!' !!! And as I say, she has only been doing it six months!

Also, that incident on the bus sounds terrifying. And I believe you. I had similar things happen when I lived in London for five years in my late teens/early 20s. I got hounded by men whilst walking from the tube to my house, whilst on the bus, and whilst on my lunch break etc...

And I got called the most awful names when I told them 'PLEASE leave me alone.' I was terrified the one time, as one followed me to my house so he knew where I lived. He stayed there, hanging around outside the front door.

Luckily I lived in a house share with 6 others - 3 men and 3 women, and the 3 men were all in and went outside together and yelled at him that he had 10 seconds to get away from here or they will call the police. That scared him off thank God. He never returned.

That was just one example of at LEAST a dozen things that happened in the five years I lived there. Mostly just pestering and hollering, but several incidents were actually really scary and quite threatening.

balmytissues I am sorry you had to tolerate this, and the man on the bus absolutely DID do what he did to intimidate you.

There's no reason at ALL for any man to sit next to a lone woman who he doesn't know, on a bus, when it's 90% empty FFS. IMO, the only reason any man would do that is to intimidate or harass her.

I finished a (long!) shift the other day. Always have my NHS lanyard on ( if i don't put it on I misplace it and don't have it for the next day and all our doors need it) but it was under my coat.
Anyway, queuing up for local small Tesco, as DH had messaged we had no milk.
Make it in to the store eventually, as queue quite big. Then the guy at the door comes over to me, and says in future just show your badge and you don't need to queue.
I said thanks but I don't mind. I'd be mortified to show my badge and jump the queue!
She was one cheeky fecker,, and she knows it. They operate through sheer gall and bullying.
You did what I would have done OP, and I too would have seethed over it for days...

Ye, I can get quite fearful of men late at night (I'm grand during the day), but it was the other one butting in that annoyed me more than anything.