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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to plan on having a BBQ

439 replies

Numptydumptyfelloffthewall · 02/04/2020 12:58

Hi,

I've seen such conflicting advice and information on this lockdown that I'm starting to doubt my own judgement. I've tried to follow the lockdown to the letter. DH and I are working full time from home and i've been out once since lockdown for food shopping. We have 2 DC (4, 6) who are home and havent been out, they run around in the garden for exercise.

I have some BBQ coal in the shed and was wondering if it would be unreasonable/ wrong for DH, me and the 2 DC to have a BBQ on Sunday when the weather is predicted to be a bit nicer. We wouldnt need to buy any supplies or meet anyone else and it would really brighten a very stressed and difficult week but I dont want to be disrespectful or undermine the lockdown, esp as I have family both on the shielding list and working in the NHS, so I really understand how important it is to delay the spread of Covid 19.

We're in a standard 1930s 3 bed semi so we have a nice sized garden but not huge. If we do go ahead, should we go in if our neighbours also come into their garden? Or set up at the bottom of the garden? I usually keep the kids inside during the actual cooking as DD4 is asthmatic but they find eating BBQ food outside to be a huge novelty/ treat.

OP posts:
NotEverythingIsBlackandwhite · 02/04/2020 13:10

I usually keep the kids inside during the actual cooking as DD4 is asthmatic
That should show you that it has an effect on everyone's lungs. I hate it when my next door neighbours decide to stink out the atmosphere with BBQ fuel. It's as if they don't have a sense of smell.

Bumfuzzled · 02/04/2020 13:11

You can do what the hell you like in your own garden.

When it warms up a bit we are going on a camping holiday in the garden. Tents, bbqs, windbreaks the lot. The kids can’t wait Smile

pooopypants · 02/04/2020 13:12

OP. The reports of BBQs, or moreso the problem with them is people from different houses socialising. The issue isn't with the BBQ in and of itself.

Arseholes who think they're exempt from the social distancing guidelines were having BBQs as if it were any normal weekend, instead of shielding or SI like they should have been

Fill your boots OP Gin

Bluntness100 · 02/04/2020 13:13

That should show you that it has an effect on everyone's lungs

Well no. Being outside you don’t need to stand directly over a bbq. A reasonable distance and there is no risk. It’s not like a massive non fire.

Honestly this is scare mongering and panic to a degree I wouldn’t believe I would ever witness.

AmICrazyorWhat2 · 02/04/2020 13:13

I grilled outside the other day when it was sunny here - had to wear a sweatshirt but it was still nice to be outside. Enjoy it, it'll be fun and no, you're not breaking any rules. Smile

maddening · 02/04/2020 13:15

Our estate is planning a huge estate street bbq when we finally get released back in to the wild, there is much excitement at the prospect.

Dishwashersaurous · 02/04/2020 13:15

Why on earth would you think this wouldn’t be ok?

The issue is about mixing households not what happens within the individual household

Roussette · 02/04/2020 13:17

Of course it doesn't have an effect on everyone's lungs! We keep the lid down on ours most of the time, and I can't even smell it from the kitchen with the window open.

Even simple acts are criticised by people who want to the drain the pleasure out of everything. We have to grab our opportunities to do what we can, within the rules, and I'm sure we really don't need endless narky posts from jobsworths.

Chiyo666 · 02/04/2020 13:17

Ffs use your brain.

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 02/04/2020 13:19

I swear some people will only be happy when we are sitting in solitary confinement in darkened rooms eating bread and water

Rebootingagain · 02/04/2020 13:19

Barbecues are banned now are they? In case your NDN has covid and the fumes might cause him to cough. I would think that would be the least of NDN's worries if he has the virus!

Where I live they have banned all burning of rubbish outside due to the effect of smoke on people with the virus, so if loads of people start having BBQs I actually wouldn’t be surprised if that’s the next think they ban.

They have also implemented a total 40mph speed limit to reduce accidents on the empty roads (we normally have no speed limit out of towns)

TiredofSM · 02/04/2020 13:19

Can you? Yes.
DH actually asked me if we could this weekend and I said no. I’m just not in the mood. It feels like a joyful thing to do and I don’t feel like that. I’m down and sad and I don’t want others feeling the same, looking out their window and see us firing up a bbq. Can’t explain why but it just feels wrong.

Roweeeeena · 02/04/2020 13:20

Our local fire service have posted specifically asking people not to light bbqs or burn rubbish to avoid using resources.
I think it's a bit much tbh. Do bbqs regularly require putting out by fire fighters??

Noodlenosefraggle · 02/04/2020 13:20

The stories about police breaking up Bbq's were related to parties where several households were at one barbeque, not where a family who were already isolated together had a bbq in their own house!

Herpesfreesince03 · 02/04/2020 13:21

So many miserable people on here. One or other of my neighbours have had a bbq every day this week. I love the smell. If smoke gets into the house then I close my back windows. It’s a non issue

JurassicShay · 02/04/2020 13:22

We had a bbq yesterday lunch time. Was good to feel a bit normal for a while!

Roussette · 02/04/2020 13:22

Reebotagain There is a huge difference between burning rubbish outside and having a barbecue. I half cook my meat anyway, so it's probably on for about 15 minutes. Rather different to a bonfire smouldering away for a couple of days.

Doubt very much they will be banned.

Cohle · 02/04/2020 13:22

I wouldn't personally. My neighbours are clearly avoiding using their gardens when others nearby are using theirs, so being outside for hours on end BBQing would feel like I was monopolising the outdoor space.

Roussette · 02/04/2020 13:23

p.s. I love the smell of barbecue

Roussette · 02/04/2020 13:24

I presume your gardens are very close together Cohle with little fencing in between.
I wouldn't even know if my NDNs were in theirs. Can't see into one neighbour's garden, the other one I can if I crane out of a bathroom window I don't open often.

MarieIVanArkleStinks · 02/04/2020 13:25

As long as you're not inviting guests from outside your household I think it wounds a great idea! We might join you in it, too.

The camping also sounds good but it's still a bit cold for my taste.

mencken · 02/04/2020 13:25

if it is just you, well away from the neighbours (keep the 2 metres even if there is a fence in the way, don't be a fuckwit like many of the 'clappers') and you take great precautions that no-one gets burnt and there's no fire, why not?

alternatively if the treat is eating outside, you can do that any time.

speakout · 02/04/2020 13:27

Sounds a great idea OP.

This situation is not a misery competition.

Go ahead and enjoy!

Jaxhog · 02/04/2020 13:29

I don't see why not. Provided you don't have people from outside your house there, or you create a lot of smoke that impacts your neighbours.

Cohle · 02/04/2020 13:30

I presume your gardens are very close together Cohle with little fencing in between.

Not particularly, and they are walled not fenced, but my neighbours are relatively elderly and clearly being cautious / considerate.