Another boy

[CleverQuacks]

I am a single parent and currently pregnant with my 4th child. I already have three beautiful boys. A couple of weeks ago I went for a private gender scan and found out I am having another little boy. I am so happy! I love my boys so much and can’t think of anything better than adding another little lad to my brood.

However I haven’t been able to tell any of my family. Since I announced my pregnancy they have been making comments about how this baby better be a girl and I know they will be negative when I tell them it’s another little boy. I feel so sad for my little boy that his family will not be happy about him. My family are also the type to voice their disappointment so I know they will be negative.

Would it be awful to tell them I am not finding out the sex of the baby and then just announce it when he arrives? And hope that his arrival will be enough to stop any negative comments.

Boys are great, and of course mothers love their children regardless of their gender. I am just interested in the hypothetical choice because I believe in the future we will have choice, and I don't think many would choose 4 boys and no girls. Maybe not in my lifetime, but in a few generations I think choice will be prevalent.
Similar to how parents with SN or disabled children say they wouldn't change them for all the tea in China. I believe them 100%, but I wonder if they be as delighted if their subsequent children or grandchildren were the same?

I am really nervous about this too as I am expecting my 3rd and I have 2 boys already. I would keep it to yourself tbh, once baby is here most people will be happy and at least keep their comments to a minimum. I am relatively lucky though as although my MiL would like a granddaughter, I know that she would adore another grandson as much as she adores the ones she has. My FiL bless him just wants me and baby to get through it healthy, my mum too. Its outside my family I worry about comments. I plan to do the mumsnet special head tilt with 'did you mean to be so rude?' maybe try that?

why on earth are people bothered? It's not like it is compulsory football for boys or compulsory pink sparkles for girls. At least I hope not.

Had my daughter 2 years after my son. Got lots of -oh how well organised you are....
Aren't you clever.... -never been called that before or since😕

Enjoy all your kids Op and def keep it to yourself if you think it will help.

@lmcneil003 you are seriously warped! 😣

@lmcneil003

That's a spine chilling post. Are you serious?

Congratulations on your baby boy! I would keep it quiet until the birth.

lmcneil I hope to God there never is that choice.

Did you always want so many kids though or were you trying for a girl? I don’t understand why anyone chooses to have 4+ kids.

That's a spine chilling post. Are you serious?

Yes, I believe in the next 100 years, choosing the gender of your child will be commonplace. I don't think it's too big a deal. If you want to choose, then great. If not, then no one is forcing you to.
Please note I am not saying you'd abort the wrong sex foetus, but that the sex would be determined at the point of impregnation.

Congratulations OP! I have 2 boys and I'm pregnant again (early days). Ds1 is desperate for a baby sister, Ds2 wants it to be a boy. I know friends and extended family want it to be a girl but secretly I couldn't give a shiny shite what they think. I'm more concerned about the fallout at home once we find out

Mum of boys here too. I so understand but totally know too your delight. Massive congratulations!

The most important thing is you have 4 healthy children. Boy or girl is secondary to that, I hate the idea that everyone has to have ‘one of each’.

I agree just don't tell anyone. I had boy, girl, boy ,girl and some odd comments about how clever? I'd been. Baby number 5 is a girl so not so clever any more!

I had similar comments after my third boy I was asked if I was disappointed... I was delighted, also whether I was going to try again!! I had three healthy children I'm very lucky

@Imcneil003 hmm not sure about comparing having boys to someone having SN or disabled children Completely different situations.

Also some women really don’t have a preference and for the women that do some do actually hope for a boy or boys, why is that so hard to get your head round?

I guess if everyone had a choice then you’d probably see more ‘one of each’ families but it doesn’t mean either family would have cared that much if they didn’t have a choice and ended up with all girls or all boys.

I believe them 100%, but I wonder if they be as delighted if their subsequent children or grandchildren were the same?

Oh fuck off with your faux “oh I believe them, honestly ” your thought process is obvious here.

Your posts read like they were written by either a very inexperienced 20 year old childless person who likes to think of themselves as a deep thinker, but has absolutely zero life experience, or a detached sociopath

As for selecting sex before implantation, that is already possible and tightly controlled in the uk at least, because choosing life based solely on something as arbitrary and vacuous as sex is fucking horrific. You are not shopping for a toaster you are talking about human beings

what a shame I'd had another boy as they just go off and leave you in the end.

Children should go off and leave us, boy or girl, as that's the way of the world. Our children are only ever on loan to us and for the majority the hope is that they will grow up and lead their own lives.

@CleverQuacks Exactly and that’s all they should be caring about, that you are already a mother and having another baby without the father being around 24/7.... having a boy or girl doesn’t matter, the fact you are having a child does.

@41lmcneil003 As I said I have 5 boys and no I wouldn't have liked to choose their gender.I got what I got and I'm extremely grateful.Theres people out there unable to have DC without great difficulty.