To think 30 isn’t old to start a family

[Takemebackto]

My niece has recently announced her pregnancy. She’s just turned 30. She’s received a lot of comments saying she’s left it late. Aibu to think it’s a good age to start a family?

I think those sorts of comments are very damaging. She might have been trying for a while, who knows. I had my DD at 32. It’s not old at 30 in any way.

** I had my first at 30 and I feel like I might have hit the sweet spot!
Had my 20s to arse about, go some places, do some stuff, find DH etc.... not 40 and freaking out that my last eggs might not be up to it, which must be very stressful and upsetting for those who genuinely have left it too late.**

OR you could start at 30 like I did and then due to fertility issues actually not have the baby in your arms until 39. Not everybody leaves it too late deliberately. Some of us despite high egg reserve have conditions that require identification and treatment before they can be fixed.

30 is young in educated circles!

@zombieapocalypseisnigh

30 is young in educated circles.

WOW! What a deeply judgemental comment.

You may as well have said, 'don't worry, it's only thick people who have them at a young age!'

Isn't around 30 the average age these days? I find people who have had a university education, travelled, built up a career etc do tend to have their babies in their 30s.

30 is young where I’m from (and I was painfully aware of it as the 20 year old at antenatal )

Had mine at 34, 37 and will have third at 39. I wish I’d started around 30, however no earlier (in my case), I really loved my 20s and felt ready to be a parent in my 30s.

I would say it's all down to the individual and their lifestyle.

I had my last child in my late 20s and that was late enough for me to end our family.

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? It's totally normal. Must have been an older person say this surely? I get that when my mum started her family age 30 in the 1970s it was unusual, as many people tended to be married with kids in their early 20s back then. But these days it's entirely normal for women in their 40s to be having kids (I had my first child when I was 35 and my last one when I was 41 and no one commented on that at all).

OR you could start at 30 like I did and then due to fertility issues actually not have the baby in your arms until 39. Not everybody leaves it too late deliberately. Some of us despite high egg reserve have conditions that require identification and treatment before they can be fixed.

Very aware this can happen. My mother went through menopause at 33.

Who on earth made these comments?

I had my first and only child at 43, no one said a word to me or made any comment. Everyone’s decision is private, many of us might think privately ‘that’s rather young/old’ but to voice those sort of views out loud is totally rude and insensitive.

I think 30 is a pretty average age to be starting a family now isn't it? I had my first child at 26 and my last at 36 and didn't have any more problems or any less energy with my youngest than I did with my eldest. People should be offering your niece their congratulations and keeping their negative comments to themselves.

average age for first time Dutch mums in general is 29.9, for mums with university level education it is nearly 33, so no, 30 is completely reasonable!

My comment wasn't meant to be offensive. It was about formal education, not intelligence, and entirely fact-based.

Women who have basic university and higher degrees, like Masters and PHds, are far, far more likely to delay having children until they're in their 30s.

30 is totally normal? I had DD at 25 and was the youngest at my post natal group and the first of my friends to have kids