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Mongering: What's your favourite thing to monger if not fear? *title edited by MNHQ*

80 replies

FunkyKingston · 22/03/2020 21:04

Mine are

Cheese
Iron
And whores

In that order.

OP posts:
drspouse · 23/03/2020 07:40

I've got two snotmongers and they are also argumentmongers.

Hyrana · 23/03/2020 08:04

Billy Monger, the young race car driver who lost his legs in a tragic accident but has fought back and has gone racing again. He is an inspiration. Smile

donquixotedelamancha · 23/03/2020 08:14

I accuse of you of OFFENCEMONGERING

Great term. We've needed a term for MN offencemongers for some time.

AnotherMurkyDay · 23/03/2020 09:58

Thundermonger bringer of thunder

TeaAddict235 · 23/03/2020 10:05

Check you out @FunkyKingston knowing your scripture! Preach!

MitziK · 23/03/2020 10:09

A butcher could be a sausagemonger.

Give it a few weeks of shortages/rationing and you can take that any way you want to.

Wouldyoubemyamericanboy · 23/03/2020 10:11

I accuse of you of OFFENCEMONGERING @ShirleyPhallus**

GrinGrinGrin I love MN sometimes

ShirleyPhallus · 23/03/2020 10:12

Not sure why anyone thinks the word “mong” is appropriate on any thread, irrespective of its true meaning it’s totally unnecessary. But there we go 🤷🏼‍♀️

thatgingergirl · 23/03/2020 11:01

I would like to be a flowermonger. I think I'm an ohwellnevermindmonger.

FrauleinF · 23/03/2020 11:25

www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=monger

This was an amusing way to spend five minutes. Incidentally, according to the list, the word "monger" also has the exact same slang meaning as the four letter word mentioned earlier.

I also discovered that the word "fuckmonger" was a thing, though didn't quite have the meaning I expected. I'm more of an idgafmonger myself... 🤷‍♀️

MitziK · 23/03/2020 11:36

Wouldn't mind having a costermonger down the street right now. There's fuck all fresh veg in the shops, according to DP.

donquixotedelamancha · 23/03/2020 11:36

Not sure why anyone thinks the word “mong” is appropriate on any thread, irrespective of its true meaning it’s totally unnecessary.

Thanks for standing up against people using the literal meaning of problematic words. Despite the best efforts of so many brave wokefolk, there is still far too much of this sort of thing.

Once newspeak is firmly entrenched it will be impossible to express ungood thoughts. Keep up the good work comrade.

donquixotedelamancha · 23/03/2020 11:38

For any offencemongers who aren't clear, that was sarcasmmonging.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 23/03/2020 12:29

Thanks for standing up against people using the literal meaning of problematic words. Despite the best efforts of so many brave wokefolk, there is still far too much of this sort of thing.

This reminds me of a thread a few months ago on which I engaged fully, but eventually gave up as some people just wouldn't accept that people use language differently. I don't want to go over it all again, but it revolved around the use of the word 'queer' - not used in relation to a person (as that can potentially be misinterpreted) but to describe an object or a situation.

Apparently, if I find that my toaster doesn't seem to be working and say to myself "Hmm, that's queer", rather than just using language and vocabulary in a normal, instinctive and valid everyday way, I am in fact latently and subliminally declaring my hatred for all homosexuals worldwide, it would seem.

Certain people just would not have it that, because they only know one meaning of a traditional word, or would themselves only think to use (or avoid using) it in a hateful and offensive way, other people might innocently use language in the same way that English speakers have done throughout the centuries.

There's so much genuine hatred in the world that needs to be addressed and challenged, it seems quite a waste of time and energy to look for it where there obviously is none.

ForInstance · 23/03/2020 12:30

How has this thread got to 3 pages without a mention of Alan Partridge?! It’s a classic AP opener. This has made me despair of humanity more than any amount of toilet roll stockpiling! Grin

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 23/03/2020 12:44

I'm a creative artist and, through the use of traditional Norwegian yoiking, I serenade the valiant workers at my local sewage plant to keep their spirits up as they trawl through and discard the most putrid specimens by hurling them on to separate sections of a far-off, very tall ladder-like structure, where they are left to air-mature for two weeks before being carefully and safely graded and processed.

Straightforward enough, you'd think, but so many people just cannot grasp the complexity of my admittedly very niche occupation when I try to explain it to them, especially as I'm only 17.

However, when I tell them that I'm a young rung-hung-flung-dung-tongue-sung-monger, it's immediately obvious to all.

donquixotedelamancha · 23/03/2020 12:48

when I tell them that I'm a young rung-hung-flung-dung-tongue-sung-monger, it's immediately obvious to all.

:-)

Still doesn't excuse your previous toasterphobia. You are cancelled.

WiddlinDiddlin · 23/03/2020 12:58

Oh I feel like yesterday was productive now, with my coining of the 'offencemonger' term and outing of an actual offencemonger to boot.

is pleased with self

@donquixotedelamancha good work! Excellent sarcasmmongering!

donquixotedelamancha · 23/03/2020 13:07

donquixotedelamancha good work! Excellent sarcasmmongering!

I appreciate your praisemonging.

HaudMaDug · 23/03/2020 13:17

Would a mushroom merchant be a fungusmonger?

MitziK · 23/03/2020 13:30

Surely a Praisemonger would be a Priest?

rslsys · 23/03/2020 14:07

Would a Mongermonger be the person who arbitrates whether a given trade or calling can be mongered?

Mysterian · 23/03/2020 14:13

Are Weight Watchers reps hungermongers?

donquixotedelamancha · 23/03/2020 14:23

Gaarrr me hearties. Be a pirate better known as a plundermonger?

UnfinishedSymphon · 23/03/2020 15:33

Thanks OP this has cheered me right up today 👍