Should we allow separate transactions from the same family?

[UserXRay29]

So I work in a small supermarket and we're limiting essential items to two per customer. But daily, we're getting excuses and justifications why that's not enough for people.

Some people are shopping for large families, others are shopping for neighbours - and it really causes problems for staff because we don't know whether we should be letting people rejoin the queue to do a second shop. Where do you draw the line and how do people prove they're shopping for neighbours? As far as I know, they can't, and we'll just get more abuse for asking for proof anyway.

On the CV board, people are advocating DPs paying separately so they can get twice the amount whilst a post on AIBU is threatening to report a worker for flouting the restrictions and putting things through as separate transactions.

I'm usually easygoing - I don't ID people for booze or scratchcards when they're with their children. But this isn't really about loopholes, it's about making sure there's something for everyone.

So, back to my topic question, are we unreasonable NOT to allow this?

I come from a large Indian family - it’s possible to make a decent Indian meal everyday for 8 people with two cans of chickpeas, quarter of a pack of frozen spinach, maybe 2-3 cloves of garlic and half an onion, 500-700g of wholewheat flour, a tbsp oil and 200g of lentils that have been tempered with tiny amounts of spices / seeds / frozen or fresh or powdered ginger.

So even for a huge family there doesn’t have to be such a huge daily shop. However, local to my parents, the Indian community is bulk buying 10-20kg bags of rice / flour / lentils - thus making it impossible for the vulnerable to buy any

It’s always the same though. “It’s not fair” and “my needs are greater than everyone else’s. Even on the 20 odd posts on this thread, you’ve already got people explaining why the rules should be flouted for them because they are more special than the next person.

Just accept that the bloody rules are there to try and make it more fair for everyone and stop trying to find loopholes. Last week everyone wanted supermarkets to restrict sales. Now they are, everyone is moaning because they only wanted those restrictions to apply to other people.

Rationing is the only way round this, but once again, the government are leaving the responsibility with society, and it doesn't work because there will always be people who don't get it or don't care. It shouldn't fall to supermarket staff to wrangle it out. It makes it impossible. The staff should at least have clear guidance from their manager, who should be available to deal with complaints.

What does your manager say, OP?

Just accept that the bloody rules are there to try and make it more fair for everyone and stop trying to find loopholes.

How does it make it fairer for everyone if a percentage of us with young children can't go out and shop for ourselves because we're doing the right thing and staying in as to not to risk infecting people?

We didn't panic buy, we've tried to be sensible and "fair" but my 5 year is a very picky eater. I wish he wasn't. I'd love him to drink water happily but he won't.

@gingersausage

Exactly. More than half this thread is now people giving their justifications and I'm sure some of them are very reasonable. But everyone can justify anything and that's assuming everyone in store tells the truth.

I don't see what we can do. Either the rule is firm - the limits are the limits are the limits - or just let people buy what they want without limits. Because being flexible inevitably leads to resentment from others which I take the brunt of.

It is a tough call but these are difficult times so I would expect supermarkets to uphold their own rules for fairness to all. If you are shopping for more than one person you do each a shop on a different day. For people with bigger families it just means you have to go out shopping more often with restrictions in place. This is not ideal but looks like it is going to have to be done for the foreseeable.

We get through shed loads of milk as we have two toddlers. The restrictions mean I will have to go shopping every week to get milk. I do not drive so that means asking dh or walking. The whole situation isn't ideal for anyone but we all have to make do for now.

I work in a pharmacy and we are having to limit the sale of paracetamol to one pack of 16 per customer. This is a company policy that I need to abide by to give everyone a chance at being able to but some should they need it. Everyone has a story as to why they need more, mainly because it will only last two days if taken at the max dose but it doesn't change the rules. If you bend the rules for one person they inevitably tell a friend who will then give you an earful of abuse when you refuse them.

Four baking potatoes are no good to us, we need five. If this goes on we'll have to introduce proper rationing.

No you really don’t need 5, you need to be a bit more flexible with your menu

Agree shoppers just have to spilt items
It's not happened yet, but if I end up shopping for my neighbours. If they all need it I'll be shopping for 7 households. Even if one or two dont need me and can help, they will also be helping others. So I can see either me trying to shop for 7 and me, or a couple if us all shopping for 3 or 4 households each. Splitting isnt going to happen easily.

I'm struggling with the conflicting requirements to "buy what you need" and "social distance". The supermarket was heaving this morning so there was not much social distancing going on. (When I got home I definitely felt the need for a shower and to wash all my clothes).
I did buy enough stuff to feed my family for a week and am now not planning to venture out again until this time next week (I am a prepper so virtually all of what I bought was fresh). The trouble is that this is correct in terms of social distancing, but not so good in terms of taking more food than I strictly need now.

This is really stressful- I am now stuck inside and my boyfriend (who doesnt live with me) is getting me food etc. However, because of "rationing" he cant get enough for us both.

I wish the government would come up with a workable solution to ensure those self isolating or socially distancing can get what they need.

Four baking potatoes are no good to us, we need five.

Need... What we need is for people to start thinking more flexibly for the time being.

Four of you have a baked potato, the other has a tin of soup.

Or you divide the four potatoes so that everyone has an equal amount and and serve with whatever you were going to have with it.

We do need ration books if this doesn't calm down. I'm shopping for 5, plus elderly neighbours and one set of friends who are self isolating due to symptoms. The restrictions mean significantly more trips to the shops, and therefore an incremental increase in chances to catch or spread this virus. It would make far more sense if I could go weekly and actually buy enough.

Just accept that the bloody rules are there to try and make it more fair for everyone and stop trying to find loopholes. Last week everyone wanted supermarkets to restrict sales. Now they are, everyone is moaning because they only wanted those restrictions to apply to other people.

That's a very good point there. It's a bit like a lot of the parking threads, where people want restricted parking for residents only in their own streets, but I bet not many of them would consider paying to use a car park rather than grabbing a free unrestricted space on other people's residential streets. Congestion is the same: why does everybody have to use the roads when I need them?

Plenty of people undoubtedly do have good reasons for needing more than the restricted amounts being allowed, but how else can shops manage it short of us going back to rationing?

It's the same with some people trying to find reasons to justify self-isolating themselves. As well as those clearly in the identified at-risk groups, there are others stretching it to find any reason not to have to go to work. There was a man on the TV the other day (maybe early 40s) skyping in to ask a doctor if he could be considered to be at risk because he had an asthma attack over 20 years ago and occasionally uses a brown inhaler from time to time now.

If everybody is at high risk and thus off work, the country is going to grind to a halt - then the food restrictions will be academic, as there'll be nobody to grow/manufacture/produce/deliver/sell it anyway.

We do need ration books if this doesn't calm down

Absolutely. Someone buying for a family of 5 can buy the same as someone buying for 1. It makes no sense!

Four baking potatoes are no good to us, we need five. If this goes on we'll have to introduce proper rationing.

Maybe missing the point here, but did you say that your youngest are 3 and 5? Do they really eat a whole massive baked potato each, the same as the adults?

my friend is buying for her family - plus fiancé's mum and her boss, both of whom are elderly in isolation. It's a nightmare.

@GrumpyHoonMaine I love your recipe Thanks

For milk, have a look at companies like milk and more who deliver. I've never been so glad to have the services of an old school milkman (albeit one who I order online from and pay by direct debit). Arrives at dawn, no social distancing needed! Plus you can get bread etc too.

No, you don’t need 5 potatoes, you want 5 potatoes. You can buy 4 baking potatoes and 4 more different bloody potatoes. Or you can chop up the four potatoes into wedges, or make them into dauphinoise potatoes, or roast them, or mash them. This is a bloody prime example of the sheer entitlement. It’s not about potatoes, potatoes don’t matter, but on an exponential scale it’s the attitude.

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

It feels like comments such as this are just getting lost amongst more and more justifications.

I leave for work in just under an hour and I think all I can do is stick to the strict limit and duck when people start throwing things...

It is difficult as for example someone could go and buy 2 multipacks of beans and have 8 tins but the next person comes along and there are only single tins left so can only buy 2.

I've offered to shop for neighbours, I live next to a set of 8 retirement bungalows plus elderly neighbours each side so potentially 10 households plus my own I could at some stage be asked to get supplies for if they all needed it- granted in all likelihood only one or two will actually ask me to get anything as most have families or can use the internet (I just felt they should all know we are here).

However I completely support the restrictions, the panic buying and bare shelves have gone too far. My local Morrison's today was stripped bare and not just essentials, the sweets, crisps, biscuits, fizzy drinks etc were almost empty!

Yes OP I feel for you. You have a really difficult job at the moment. And I think all you can do is stick to the rules.

Yes Buttery and we need to be flexible , only children aged under one and a half actually NEED milk (a lot of children get allergies from too much). So maybe think of giving them watered down milk with hot chocolate or use plant milk it's not the end of the world .

Vegans don;t suffer from not having dairy.

@Dinosauratemydaffodils having young children does not make you a protected class or give you more rights than anyone else. I’m not quite sure when in the last 10 or 15 years having children elevated you to sainthood and made you untouchable.

I totally blame the rise of the “mummy blogger” for this strange conviction that seems to have been conveyed to parents that makes some (and I emphasise some, not all) of them think that children in general, and their child in particular, are the most important things in the universe. News flash; they aren’t. Everyone has equal rights to be fed, warm, housed, loved and safe.