Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate constantly having to explain my name?

126 replies

lsfhs · 16/03/2020 16:43

I have a welsh name. (I don’t live in wales and never have.) No one can say it or spell it. Plus, my parents called me my middle name but gave me a first name that is different (and horrible.)

I can’t change it but I hate it. I really don’t think it’s an exaggeration to sa my life would be different if I’d been given a nice ordinary name!

OP posts:
TurkeyBasterHopeItWorks · 17/03/2020 08:40

Hi OP,

Life is too short to live with such negativity surrounding your name and memories of bullying. Your name is a daily reminder of this every time someone struggles to pronounce it.
It doesn't matter how old you are, choose a name you love, tell everyone you care about this is your new name and that's it. Job done, move on with your life with positivity and be happy.
People change names all the time, it's only a big deal if you make it one.

CaffiSaliMali · 17/03/2020 08:41

@SerenDippitty

On the Baby Name boards there are similar comments when people post looking for Irish, Scottish or Welsh names.

A poster considering the Welsh Mabli got some unpleasant comments, as did a poster considering the Irish Tadhg. About a year ago someone asked for posters preference of Harri, Tomos and Rhodri and got told off for not saying they were Welsh as opposed to 'spelt wrong' Hmm

Ironically Harri predates Harry. Harri is Welsh for Henry and eventually became a nickname for Henry, and was anglicised to Harry.

KahlanRahl · 17/03/2020 08:42

My aunt changed her name in her sixties.

Also, plenty of people with foreign names choose an English name because for some reason the English pronounciation can really mangle some names Grin. I use one with a similar sounding start, but the ending is different (when I'm in an English speaking country that is).

Glowcat · 17/03/2020 08:42

If you’ve not got any family links with Wales and the name has to be spelt out to people I can see that it would be awkward. I don’t think it’s too late to change what you’re known as if it bothers you so much.

Glowcat · 17/03/2020 08:45

Interesting CaffiSaliMali. I thought Harry came from Harold.

WaxOnFeckOff · 17/03/2020 08:48

I have a friend who hates her name and changed it in her 50s, it's never too late. She chose something with a similar length and sound and to be fair, I always think of her by her original name but "translate" it in my head before saying or writing it. She loves it now but had always been embarrassed by it before.

MikeUniformMike · 17/03/2020 08:51

@Ginfordinner, Heulwen is difficult to say if you don't speak welsh.

The eu is a diphthong.

I think the nearest I can get is as follows.

He - like the He in Henry
ul - like the english word ill.
wen - like the wen in Gwen, rhymes with Ken.

The whole word is two syllables, the e and u merge.

It's a bit like Hail-wen but that's not quite right. Maybe Hell-wen with a sneaky little i (like in ill) beween the e and l.

It means sunlight or sunshine.

NeedToKnow101 · 17/03/2020 08:53

Is it Myfanwy? I think that's a lovely name when pronounced properly, but I imagine it could lead to a lot of teasing.

Frankenheimer · 17/03/2020 08:58

My aunt changed her name in her late 60s, to something completely different (think Susan to Harriet - just totally unrelated).

It worked fine. She is Auntie Harriet now.

You CAN change your name. People just learn the new name. It's really not that hard.

MikeUniformMike · 17/03/2020 09:11

Myfanwy pronounced at Miffany is terrible. Miffany sound cute though - a suitable name for a pet rabbit maybe.

Buddug - 1st syllable Budd rhymes with with.
2nd syllable ug, the u sounds like the i in hill, pit, sit etc. The g is is like g in golf, dog etc. Will get mangled as Bud Ug, Bith ig etc.

WantToBeMum · 17/03/2020 09:52

How old are you? I don't think you are ever too old. I changed my name in my mid 30s. Yes it was awkward and difficult to persuade people to call me by my new name, with with perseverance it caught on. The name my parents chose for me was very popular when I was born but very quickly went out of fashion. I hated it, and I used to cringe inside when I had to say it, I used to avoid saying my name. Like you, I think this did affect my life. I chose a name for myself that was more timeless/classic and I really believe I'm much more open and outgoing because of it Smile

trixiebelden77 · 17/03/2020 10:25

Change it if you wish.

But be aware - I have a nice normal name. One of the most popular girls names in the world. Many many women and girls have the same name. It is the epitome of a nice straightforward Anglo name.

I have to spell it every time. Every single time.

Youdreamedmydreamforme · 17/03/2020 10:47

For all the posters saying Myfanwy pronounced as miffany. You know this is incorrect don’t you? If you ever meet a Myfanwy please do not call her Miffany. There is no variation of the name where this is correct.

SerenDippitty · 17/03/2020 11:20

Also the f in Myfanwy is pronounced as v. Any pronunciation with the f sound is wrong. The f sound in Welsh is written as a double f.

IamaBluebird · 17/03/2020 11:32

I should have added how absolutely wrong the pronunciation as miffany is to my post. Trouble is like an irritating song it is now stuck in my brain.

MikeUniformMike · 17/03/2020 11:33

@SerenDippity, I posted upthread
Pronounced Muv-ANN-wi (like the wi in with)

Socksey · 17/03/2020 11:40

I have an Irish name... Irish people think they can pronounce it... they can't Hmm
The Welsh aren't any better at it but make a point of making sure I pronounce the Welsh names correctly... the English actually try to get close to it...

SuburbanFraggle · 17/03/2020 11:49

OP
You want to be miserable.

You have many options and are choosing the one that makes you unhappy.

Other people don't really think about you (or anyone) much. It will be a 2 minute conversation between them.
" Old Beryl's changed her name to Roxanne" "Bonkers! Anyway, what are you bringing to the cake sale? Your lemon drizzle?..."

Noone really cares. Do what you want.

WhoWants2Know · 17/03/2020 12:01

I love a nice, unpronounceable Welsh name.

My name sounds like I should be a topless dancer from Essex.

NeedToKnow101 · 17/03/2020 12:03

It's more like MaVanWee. Which sounds lovely.

thatmustbenigelwiththebrie · 17/03/2020 12:05

I have a really ugly Welsh name that even Welsh people can't pronounce so I feel your pain. My dad is Welsh in my case. They churn out some quite awful names in Wales.

AmberleighMouse · 17/03/2020 12:13

Youdreamed I don't think anyone was saying that was right, were they? I read it that the poster clearly knew it was wrong.

If you go very English mainstream you run into always being called EmmaSmith to distinguish you from EmmaJones and EmmaDaniels. (I do love the name Emma though.)

MikeUniformMike · 17/03/2020 12:14

It's not help by names becoming mainstream and the mispronunciation becomes normal.
I heard someone say Ethny the other day, but I don't think that's how you say Eithne - Isn't it Eynya?

Tp93 · 17/03/2020 12:45

Is it Myfanwy?! I know someone with the same name and she hated it as a child but as she got older she started to love it I like the name too if that's your name 🙂

MikeUniformMike · 17/03/2020 12:56

@NeedToKnow101, if it was MaVanWee, it would be written Mafanwi.
My suggested pronunciation is correct.