To think ear pulling by a parent to punish a child is NOT acceptable??

[FabledBunny]

So my friend has told me that if her Son misbehaves her husband has pulled his ear to walk him to the stairs to sit there as ‘time out’ or if he doesn’t listen etc. Now i know all kids can test our patience and mis-behave but my friend’s husband sounds like a controlling bully and i know her Son who is a lovely young lad and it really makes me sad to think of him being hurt. AIBU?? Surely pulling a child by their ear is not ok?

No, it's not ok.

Time out or naughty corner is fine. Causing the child physical pain is not ok.

That's really nasty and is certainly not ok. I imagine it must hurt a lot.

Horrible, bulling behaviour.

Give it five minutes and we'll have the 'didn't do me any harm' twats.

They will tell you how being smacked by their parents was good for them, then act like a fucking sociopath for the rest of the thread. Possibly getting into "I'M ENTITLED TO MY OPINION!!" Wingey, passive aggressive bollox.

The irony will be completely lost on them.

Tell school & ask them to talk to the boy about it. If it's happening they'll be obliged to report it to children's services and it DOES need reporting. School won't mention that you tipped them off.

He could end up ripping the ear if the child tries to pull away suddenly

Thank you ladies, i didn’t think it was right but always doubt myself. I will contact school tomorrow.

I accidentally pulled/grabbed DS by the ear once (he'd run into the road, I was going for his shoulder) and I have never, ever felt worse.
I'm sure it would have hurt if I'd grabbed his shoulder hard enough to stop him but his poor ear is a really sensitive part.

You're not unreasonable at all, nobody should deliberately tug at a child's ear. Maybe your friend's husband just holds the child's ear and walks with him to the naughty step, I think you'd have to investigate more to know the facts. If the dad is rough, surely mum would put a stop to it.

Oh god my stepdad used to do that. It was not OK.

One of my parents was pulled down the garden by the ear as a child. I was told this was the reason for the hearing loss of that ear.

@drspouse Physically restraining a child who is going to be in more danger as a last resort is ok.

Doing it as part of a punishment will backfire. Also what is the dad going to do when his son is bigger than him?

Not ok. Ugh. Horribly controlling.

@LittleLittleLittle

Have to take himself to A&E hopefully.

I know someone whose father treated him like this.

He grew up to be a very big lad. Turned round and broke his fathers nose when he was 15

Agree. It's quite nasty.

Can't believe 15% think it's ok! Definitely not. Completely outdated and inappropriate. When I was a child it was a common shorthand in cartoons etc! But discipline shouldn't be like that any more, that physical dominance. We know better now.

Wow does that still happen? I remember it hurting as a child, so I'd never do it to another person.

Wow does that still happen? I remember it hurting as a child, so I'd never do it to another person.

Yes, I used to work as a Lollipop Lady and saw it quite often by parents from a particular non British culture (and no I won't name it).

Can't believe 15% think it's ok!
I discovered I was so traumatised by the memory I voted YABU

It happened to me and it did do me harm, unfortunately

Awful behaviour not acceptable at all.

Not acceptable. I work in child protection. It’s abuse.

Wonder how he'd feel if his boss did that to him. I wish to god there was an HR for kids to hold all these evil pricks to account for their actions. We are better protected at work than they are in their own homes.

How painful and degrading to be pulled by the ear, how can your friend allow her DH do it.

I thought this was going to be about my neighbour, who said she does it to her kids since her social worker told her she's not allowed to hit them anymore 😕 that, along with throwing a glass of cold water at them 😠

My friends au pair did this to her DS. She fired her immediately. Quite right too. Why would a parent be any different?