rude school dad

[Brunelofbrio]

There is always a queue to collect DD from Pre-School. They call one child at a time and sometimes it can take a while. All the parents/carers except one wait patiently.

3 times now (that I have seen this week, I presume he might do this other times too) a parent lets call him Jimmy’s Dad has ignored the line and walked straight in. AIBU to call him out on it next time or raise it as an issue with the staff.

Or should I just ignore it. ( My judgement might be skewed by the fact that Jimmy seems to upset DD -and other kids- by pushing etc.)

Mention it to the staff. Are the staff quite young? In my DD"s preschool he'd have found himself outside pretty quickly if he'd done that.

The measures are there for security purposes....if everyone did what he did, then there'd be a scrum and children would be taken away without being properly released and staff having the chance to check it's the right person.

I'd definitely mention it quietly.

Having said that, Jimmy's son might have special needs...and his Dad may have been given permission to go in first in order that he can get his son out quickly to avoid any emotional moments....if he's on the Autistic spectrum for example, then he might struggle with the process.

Ignore it.
For all you know Jimmy might have some form of SN and waiting patiently might be hard for him so nursery may have agreed to let him go first.
If Nursery have an issue they'll raise it eventually.

I would simply say 'excuse me there is a queue' see how he reacts then go from there he may just be oblivious or he may be an entitled arse.. You'll know which by his response. No good going in guns blazing straight away.. Or if you don't feel able to then mention it to the nursery staff. Entitled parents are awful.. It's like a zoo rampage at my eldest DS primary school.. Best not go into detail ill start getting worked up ha.

If the child is frequently behaving then he’s likely going in to speak to staff about the behaviour. They may have a specific plan in place. Daily feedback?

Behaving??
Behaving badly!!

There’s no feedback that I can see. (There is for other children as the member of staff at the door does this as part of the handover). Also, Jimmy’s Dad is not always first, he rocks up when maybe 12 of the 24 kids have been collected and then just strolls past the rest of hs in thr queue.

Check with a staff member whether Jimmy’s Dad has permission to pick up first/quickly. One parent in our class does because they have to go to another pick up straight after.
If not, mention it to them. If you don’t want to confront them, see if they’ll put a member of staff on the door for a couple of days.

This would irritate me so much! I hate queue jumpers!
If he has been given special permission to do this then the other parents should have been informed to avoid any ill feeling or arguments. I would ask a staff member before saying anything to him. If there's no reason for the queue jumping then I would have to say "The back of the queue is there. We're not all standing here for the fun of it! Dickhead!"

OP let someone else confront him... don't you do it 🌺

I could be ‘Jimmys’ Dad! My son is hearing impaired and has attachment difficulties, school pick up and drop off is really difficult for him, so as soon as I arrive I am allowed to walk straight in and collect him.

I wouldn't say anything. The parents I have known to do this have almost always had children with special needs, and that's none of your business.

Ask the staff if jimmys dad is getting special treatment for a very valid reason or jyst being a twat

Raise it. Why should he get to queue jump.

He may have a valid reason to be fair. Either that or he’s just a prat.

Raise it, he is doing it because he can

IF there is a special reason then the other parents should be made aware. Not all the medical info but if they aren’t told don’t expect everyone to just ignore the arrogance of basically pushing in and picking up ahead of everyone else. I’d ask the staff first, if no good reason then I’d be pointing out the back of the queue

No way. Say something. Queue jumping prat

In my case the staff didn’t proactively tell any of the parents, it wasn’t until someone asked that the staff mentioned they had been given permission to do it.

We had this at my eldest school.

Prat Dad thought he was more important that he did not need to wait. Child had no special needs. He like to make the point he was working and assume everyone was an SAHM.

The day i went to pick eldest after my Mum had died earlier in the day, I acted. I wanted my son and was not prepared for some prat to barge through the 20+ parents to the front of the queue. I was second from front. I stepped in front of his as he marched down the line and pointed the back of the queue.
He proceeded to tell me he worked and needed to get a move on.
I pointed out at lest 12 working Mums and 8 working mums at home enabling prats like him to work.
He attempted to push past - I am 6ft 1 and he is small, very very small!
He attempted to push and lambast his way again - I was fairly intolerant that day for some reason. So I offered to place him on his sons peg so he found him when he got his coat!!

The teacher beamed and said thank he is a nightmare as he slunk to the back of the queue.

I was not in the mood and needed my son and to get out of there -all the Mums knew hence I was at the front after the Mum with the kid with special needs. It is still mentioned amongst the Mums when we go out.

No time for arrogant dick head dads or mums

Seems a bit slow that teachers would call out the children one at a time for collection. Couldn't they do it two or three children at a time to make the process easier for the parents and for the children?

Brilliant stuffedpeppers

No sister1 you need to do it one at a time so you make sure they go home with parent/childminder, that they have their bag, pictures, letter and if relevant lunchbox. It isn’t easy.

Approach the teachers and ask politely - say that several parents have noticed Jimmys dads queue behaviour and consider it rude and unfair, and that you wanted to have a quiet word with staff to check if there was prior arrangements for Jimmys dad to do this. If there isn't, ask if the staff can please remind Jimmys dad about the process for pick up, or do it yourself.

Seems a bit slow that teachers would call out the children one at a time for collection.
I thought this. When DD was in pre-school we all just hung about outside, not in a queue. Staff would look out and recognize people - "Jack there's your mummy off you go; Topsy and Tim off to mummy" and so on. Took next to no time.

Yup Jimmy’s Dad is being a CF! Had a quiet word with staff this morning and it is confirmed - no special arrnagements... The queue is not visible to the staff member on the door so they hadn’t picked up on it. They will now hopefully!