I’m going to have to split up because his phrases irritate me

[LittleBlackCurlyHairs]

Bloke I’ve been seeing for 8 months. He says the weirdest phrases and says the strangest things I can’t get over my annoyance.

One of them is, he’ll yawn and then say “oh! I’m yawning well!”. Wtf does that even mean?? I’ve never heard it said before and he says it almost every day.
Another one is “we need to nip that in the bun” bun??!! I have told him that it’s bud but he carries on saying Bun. I find it annoying.

“Keep sure you do that” “keep sure to set your alarm” etc etc ... keep sure?!

Jellypeano on the pizza

There is other stuff too but relationship aside ... has anyone else heard of these sayings?? (Keep sure, yawning well etc)

I went out for dinner with a friend of mine and he wanted chicken fajitas and a carafe of wine but unfortunately he asked for “chicken fajitters” and a “cravat of wine.” Thankfully his drink wasn’t brought to the table in a neck scarf!

@Aweebawbee
Yes - I think quite a few of these sorts of expressions are 'in' jokes from film/TV etc but if you've never watched the shows then they just seem, well, a bit weird....

I wouldn't say it was 'thick' as such, just culturally different. DS is into drama and has done lots of Shakespeare (and I've spent hours helping him learn lines) so we quite often hurl the odd Shakespearean phrase around, but I appreciate to others it sounds weird or pretentious.

I got the impression the bloke in question wasn't using the phrase in the Master and Commander sense; the poster says he used it 'in complete seriousness'.

I often call ds1's dairy free cheese ' cheese free cheese' which causes an eye roll or two. I actually really like this one and it's the sort of thing I would say

Re family idioms, I think that's a different thing. We have loads of stupid ones but they stay IN THE FAMILY. It's like wandering around the office sniggering about in jokes you have with your mates, you just don't do it.

It's the way men like to portray a 'manly' exterior to their colleagues and friends and then revert to baby/Tudor/whatever strange caricature when with the woman their dating (and it rarely gets further than dating). Just why? If that's your actual personality, fine, but be consistent with everyone you know dont inflict that shit on just me

Smorgasbored0000

My DH does this and I think it’s cute

What, all of it?

A family friend always says "bum-fire night"
And when saying Belgian chocolate, pronounces the g like a g rather than a j sound!

People have corrected her but it's like she just cannot actually hear the difference in the words/sounds.

@Reginabambina

I say weird things like this sometimes. My brain is just slightly malfunctioning constantly

Nearly everyone says weird things at some point in their life, but would you persist in saying pacifically instead of specifically if it was pointed out to you it wasn't correct, and do you have pet phrases like OP's BF which you say again, again and again?

My first boyfriend (I was 15) was one of these elongating 'salutations', 'perchance' wankers who did it to make himself sound much cleverer than he actually was.

He used to say 'hows you?' which made me feel a bit sick

But the turning point came when he updated the 'hobbies' section of his MSN profile to include 'pleasures of the flesh' (basically telling the world we were fucking each other and that he enjoyed it)

I binned him the day after that ridiculousness appeared on his profile.

I do wonder after reading this if some of the more extreme examples are people who are neurologically different (like the one whinnying and strutting, I know someone who could do it though you'd work out he is on the spectrum after a couple of days with him. In normal everyday life he's very shy - but on the dance floor or in an intimate situation he is very different from most people and from his daily persona - very uninhibited :))

And other examples are some kind of verbal tics(where people have no control and can't just stop at being told to stop) or again, impact of dyslexia on speech.
So did make me feel maybe I'm being cruel at laughing out loud at many of these examples .

It's different of course when someone is well aware it's wrong or weird what they are saying but persist because in their head they are cute 🙄

You've got The Ick. Time to end it!

Btw, since moving to West Midlands (not Birmingham) I did hear 'babby' for baby a few times so assumed it was regional. Also heard holi-bobs first time ever here from my manager, I actually didn't understand and had to ask him what it meant 😂

Also here for the sex phrases...but also to share that my mum (bless her) used to call Matalan 'Mataland' like it was some kind of fricking theme park! We had to correct her before we killed her....

Lots of people round here (essex) say taking the michael its not really annoying

My ex used to refer to sex as cuddles ...
And when I knew I was about to dump him as he cheated on me .. he said those cuddles were nothing like our cuddles ! Ours will always be special cuddles!
Nope he wasn’t a teenager he was late 30’s ... my bad for pretending not to hear the word cuddles ...

I think family idioms get so ingrained that people don't realise other folk find them irritating.

I reckon that’s part of what makes a long relationship too. I just confirmed trust that about 5% of what I say doesn’t just sound weird to anyone that’s not my DH or DC..

But anyway, on the saying well known phrases wrong thing can you not google them and present as proof??

I think getting normal sensible sayings or words wrong constantly, especially after being corrected is being wilfully ignorant. It's like going out of your way to sound stupid. I couldn't be with someone like that. SIL does it. She keeps clothes in her Chester Draws. She shops at Car bootys and Mataland. She eats jelly-peenos. DH has said more than once, "Sal, (not real name) what the fuck is a jelly-peeno?! You know it's pronounced Halapenyo, right?" Or "Did you seriously just call Matalan Mataland?" So she does know but she still says them wrong knowingly.

I wouldn't be able to stand the years to come of cringing in company when he gets stuff like that wrong. Your friends looking confused and thinking, "What the hell did he just say?!?!"

@Cassandrainthenight not quite the same but I have mistakes that I say more often than the correct thing. So I often call the kitchen the chicken for example. I know the difference between the two, I know what I mean to say, but the wrong word comes out. Thankfully most people just accept it now. It also helps that very few people these days have chickens so most people understand what I mean.

'babby' for baby is also a Derbyshire thing.

Reginabambina,

I think that's totally different from "I'm yawning well "😃
Yours sound endearing more than anything and I think it'd be quite obvious that it's a brain glitch rather than you insisting in calling kitchen chicken :).

I think quite a few of these sorts of expressions are 'in' jokes from film/TV etc but if you've never watched the shows then they just seem, well, a bit weird....

But that surely only works if the person you're habitually saying them to recognises the references, and/or finds them amusing/appropriate, otherwise you just have a cloth ear for your audience?

For instance, throwing around Shakespearean tags or Master and Commander jokes when both people know the plays/film/books is clearly fine, just as it's fine when DH and I, encountering cancelled flights, or a breakdown in rural France on a Sunday afternoon in August, will say to one another 'We've gone on holiday by mistake.'

But my father has the awful habit of just habitually saying phrases, over and over again, when neither he nor the recipient of his 'wit' knows the derivation or finds it funny -- he appears to have forgotten that he said exactly the same unfunny thing to the same unamused person an hour ago, or yesterday.

It's fairly clear to me that he's not neurotypical, and has at some point in his youth decided that this is how you communicate with other people, and has gone on doing it ever since because he thinks that's what you're supposed to do. He is as genuinely unable to see that the same truism from the Talmud or randomly breaking into a Flanders and Swann song, repeatedly, regardless of appropriateness or audience, is as maddening and boring as being the recipient, for the tenth time, of a twenty-minute (literally) account of his last visit to the dentist -- this has occasionally been told to complete strangers, too.

The other person I can think of who does this to a less agonising extent is a friend of mine who is also, I suspect, not NT. He's an attractive silver fox who has just become single in his early 50s, but I keep trying to hint that the language he habitually uses about himself will repel anyone - he's never in a rush he's 'bustling about', he's never sitting down, he's 'ensconced', and refers to sex as 'congress', always with an 'ahem' in front of it.

He also refers to making dinner and supervising homework for his children as 'doing the heavy lifting' (hence the divorce)...

@Cassandrainthenight thank you for the words of support. The fear of being annoying is real.

Oh, and my youngest called Spaghetti - "bisketti" when a toddler and totally of her own accord, I actually never heard it before or anywhere else until this thread.
She's five now but we still occasionally call spaghetti bisketti 😃, even in public, so might be enraging people in our vicinity thinking it's a harmless(and unique 😂) toddler word.

I'm keeping willy cuddles, it's fucking hilarious

Oh god, my dh seriously thinks Weetabix is Weetabits.

Also, he talks to me as if he's sending some kind of official email. He'll need help booking a train ticket online or something (ffs) and say to me, "I require your assistance with this please." Like any normal person would just say "can you give uz a hand" etc. And this is in all seriousness, not jokey. I could smack him in the face.