To let my 16 year old dd stay overnight at party?

[Kaylasmum53]

My dd is a sensible girl with a good group of friends. Tonight she and 4 of her friends have gone too a party at another friends house, a Male friend. I know there will be alcohol and as far as I know his parents are away for the night. If I'm honest I'm not really comfortable with her staying there but her friends are allowed so i don't want to force her to come home.

I've spoken to her about the dangers of alcohol and told her to stay away from spirits, i told her 3 cans of cider, maximum but am worried that she'll drink more than that, she says she won't and i want to trust her but i worry a lot!

Have i made a mistake in telling her she can stay?

I wouldn’t allow it but I’m more aware of what could happen, at 16 I was out at parties all night, drinking and taking drugs till gone 5am. Don’t want the same life for my own kids. Would be different if there was a responsible adult there though! :)

Not a chance in hell

It is relevant because you can move out at 16. As many people have done. I lived alone so could have done whatever the hell I liked at 16. To much babying going on on Mumsnet. It’s ridiculous.

The children's act defines childhood till 18.
Children are subject to safeguarding processes until their 18th birthday. Parental responsibilty ends at 18 not 16. In law 16 year olds can't do what they want.

Interesting to see mix of responses.

Would be a definite no here.

I had my own flat at 16 😂 I didn’t even have contact with my mum as she kicked me out. So who exactly was stopping me? It’s not against the law for a 16 year old to go to a party so the law is irrelevant anyway.

Make sure she knows she can phone you if there's a problem and you won't be mad. I think that's invaluable.

Well just picked her up and she seems fine. She went over the amount of alcohol that I said was ok, I told her 3/4 ciders maximum, she had 5 ciders and one vodka. Her friend had far too much and was sick a few times and definitely looks worse for wear today. I trust my dd to behave responsibly and i think that she did even though she pushed the boundaries a little, but at least she told me. I'm very proud of her.

Thanks for all the differing opinions.