CF swimming lesson mum

[Auntiedotty]

My ds attends group swimming lessons and has done for around 6 months. Lovely small friendly group, good teacher and a nice group of parents. New little boy started at the beginning of this term. I have already had to complain about his entourage (mother plus various combinations of grandparents, aunts and other family) of supporters taking photos and videos of the lesson from the side of the pool (with all of the other dcs in the shots too) despite the pool having a no cameras rule. The swim school assured me they would have a word with this childs mum and ask her not to 1. Bring so many supporters to crowd the poolside and 2. Under no circumstances was she allowed to photograph or video the lesson. Fine...
This weeks swimming lesson rolls around and CF parent drops ds off to swimming lessons wearing her own swimsuit and decides to use the sauna and hydrotherapy pool facilities for herself! She then comes back at the end of the lesson bragging about her "me time" and how all of the other parents should do the same. She says the swimming lessons are expensive so should entitle her to use of the facilities whilst her son is swimming!
Aibu to think she is a total CF and report her to the gym for using
using the facilities without a membership?

How do you know she doesn’t have a membership ??

YABU to want to report her for using the facilities without paying- not your business to police! YANBU to ask staff to pull her up on taking photographs that include your child

I really don't see a huge issue with her using the facilities; at least it means she's not sitting at the side of the pool with the whole family whilst filming the lesson. It sounds to me as though you don't like her intruding upon your already established clique?

YANBU about the photos/videos BUT YABU about who chooses to come to the lessons and her decision to use the facilities paid or not. It doesn't affect you or your DC...... Why does it bother you so much?

Flabbergasted at the audacity maybe but each to their own I guess....

Oh! Sorry just re read!
Yeah what a nightmare I’d maybe have a word with management again! Will she know it’s you that has said anything?!

Did she tell you she doesn't have a mambership?

I would simply ask the gym whether use of the sauna / hydropool is permitted by parents whose children are having swimming lessons. If it is, then you can join her If it's not, you know she's a CF and could 'drop her in it'.

I can see your point about the photos/videos, but why do you care who comes to watch the child swimming?

I take me costume and use the health suite while my kids are in their lessons. I've got a membership so I swiped myself in before I take them in. Are you sure she doesnt have a membership?

I'm not sure if my judgement of this woman has been clouded by the photograph situation and maybe iabu about the use of the facilities.
She didn't directly say that she doesn't have a membership but said that the price of the swimming lessons should entitle her to use the facilities whilst her ds is swimming. The swimming lessons are provided by an external company and not by the gym.

I regularly swim when my kids have their lessons. It’s nice to get the chance. If she didn’t pay/have membership that’s for the staff to police.

Fair enough about the photos tho.

Obviously she shouldn’t take the photos. The other stuff just sounds petty.

It bothers me the number of people they bring to watch as it is a small poolside with only one bench and they are quite often loud and try and communicate with the child during his lesson, for example cheering.
@EggysMom I like this approach and will ask the company if you are entitled to use the facilities.

Surely it's better for you if she's using the facilities during the lesson rather rather than taking up space on the precious bench!

They're happy, not really harming anyone, I would just leave them to it.

Thanks for the perspective all. I think I have a bee in my bonnet about the photograph thing and now she just gets on my nerves. The smug "me time" comment maybe got to me as I don't get any "me time" and actually pay an (expensive) membership to this gym every month and never get chance to go.
I'll maybe ask about the rules but probably wont mention it unless there are any more photo/videos.
Thanks

My sons precious swimming teacher used to encourage the parents to go & swim or use the facilities - think she liked not having so many watching her

Previous, not precious , although she was very lovely

Taking photos with your son in the picture- Definitely out of order.
Using the facilities when her son is having a lesson- mind your own business op 🙄

They’re happy and just trying to enjoy watching their dc swimming. It sounds like you resent someone new joining and are just being petty with wanting to report her. How can you be sure that there are other dc in the photos? Even though they are far away, they could be zooming in.

@Mamato2gorgeousboys they walk around the poolside taking photos and videos! None taken this week though I was pleased to see after I highlighted the issue.

The smug "me time" comment maybe got to me as I don't get any "me time" and actually pay an (expensive) membership to this gym every month and never get chance to go.

Why don’t you follow her lead and use the facilities while your ds is having his lesson?

I only asked as I sometimes take a photo of my ds when he’s in with his dad but I always zoom in to make sure there are no other dc in it. That’s good they’ve stopped then as I wouldn’t be happy with that either.

Maybe she is right and you should go and use the facilities during the lesson. Get some Me Time! If your son is focused on the lesson it won't matter to him at all.

I completely understand your concern regarding the photographs and number of spectators, but beyond that I would leave her to it.
Perhaps try to think about how you can get some more me time if at all possible, or even try to give her the benefit of the doubt and strike up a conversation with her, she may turn out to be a lovely person and you may end up having more in common than you think.
It’s better than tying yourself up in knots fretting about how she behaves.