Is dh being unreasonable

[bigchris]

Dds school have got mini options for year 9 and they involve choosing between computer science and 3 other subjects, think a language , design etc

Dh is cross that computer science can be dropped , he thinks it should be made compulsory but the issue is DD is adamant she doesn't want to do it and shouldn't be forced

Dh wants me to back him up but she seems really miserable about it and says she doesn't like python (?) And it's hard and she wants to do something she enjoys like art or design

He says he won't make her take it at GCSE but it's too important a subject to drop now

After any opinions please

She’s year 9, just starting to work out her own interests, and by that I mean she is beginning to develop her own sense of identity. So I think the best thing any parent can do is support her and allow them to blossom, not let you husband dictate what he thinks, or even what you think, it is about her (to an extent obviously) and she is clearly saying that is not of interest for her, so by pushing it all you will gain is an unhappy child in that classroom not reaching her full potential. Support her in what she enjoys; there are so many options and careers and let her find her own path in life

Presumably they are narrowing their options now so in a year’s time she may not have the option to take what she want’s for GCSE and your husband is banking on her coming around to his way of thinking in the next year.

I completely disagree with your DH, should be DD’s choice.

Not sure. If we left it up to kids to 100% choose what they studied at school, they would all be doing Home Economics and Basket Weaving.

Your DH shouldn’t be forcing his views on this.

That said python is an extremely useful language to learn.

She should choose subjects she is good at and enjoys.

GrumpyHoonMain that is not true at all.

Your DH has a vague point in that computing is the future and python is a very useful coding language (now at least.. these things change). She'll be set for life if she can learn complex coding languages (and enjoy it).

But for me the main thing is that she hates it. If she hates it she will not learn it well and won't be able to use it in the future for work anyway. If she hates it she isn't going to want to make it her career. There are other options than coding for careers and there will always be. I wouldn't force her to do it, she can always take courses later on if that's what she finds an interest in.

Computer science and computer skills can be picked up anytime if sometime wants to.
Your DH is also underestimating an angry 13 year old. If he wins this (which he shouldn't), the argument will go on all year, homework, behaviour in that lesson etc. She will hate it on principal, there's no chance of her coming around even if she could like it in different circumstances.

I didn't do computers and I ended up as a web editor.

We had a similar situation with the school giving them the option of history or geography in Y9.

We both felt history was far too important to drop and we totally disagreed with the school. DD2 (the only one who it affected) was adamant she wanted to do geography.

My mum made me do a subject I didn’t want to do and, being an incredibly stubborn child, I made sure I learnt as little as possible. Testified by my reports! Given DD2 is very like me we decided to go with her choice.

We couldn’t make her ‘learn’ a subject she didn’t want to do.

I do agree that certain subjects should not be an option until GCSE.

Thanks, dh is definitely reconsidering