to think "Are you on glue? is a terrible comeback?

[AnuvvaMuvva]

I've seen it recommended on MN as the perfect retort to use on a CF. I've just seen it used on a thread. But it's rubbish!

Who's been on glue since the 80s? If someone used this insult on me, I'd think they'd learnt English from watching Grange Hill. And then I'd just say, "No," with a tinkly head-tilt. It's hardly the type of dazzling put-down that leaves you gasping for breath.

AIBU?

Re "Did you mean to be so rude" - NOBODY on here has a contingency plan for if the answer is yes. You'd just end up saying, "Oh... OK".

I hear you OP

Its as ridiculous as "Naice" and "tinkly little headtilt"
Cringe.

Act your age not your shoe size has to be due a comeback. Maybe we should use that instead if we're using retro insults.

I like the ridiculousness of it but I live a very boring life where no MN stock phrases are ever required.

It is such a crap comeback, yet so many posters think they are hilarious for typing it.

Naice.. maybe funny once, not anymore. They are all crap and overused.

Just so long as your not have picky bits

I don't mind "naice". AIBU?!

No I’ve used it recently in a legal battle over a horse. In fact I ended up telling him and his daughter to fuck of to the far side of fuck and when they get there they can keep fucking off.
My god it felt good

NOBODY on here has a contingency plan for if the answer is yes.

That's definitely an oversight. There's a 50% chance, FFS.

Reminds me of seeing Jack Dee live once. Someone shouted out something crap, and Jack replied: "Mate. You're doing it wrong. The point of heckling is to make me look a twat."

The glue one I always want to reply "no these days I prefer whichever controversial CLASS A drug" but I don't because I'd have a witch hunt to try and out me and report me to Social services. I don't do drugs, or glue, or bath salts. But I do really have to hold myself back from posting "no I prefer main lining methamphatamine actually"

I’ve used it recently in a legal battle over a horse. In fact I ended up telling him and his daughter to fuck of to the far side of fuck

I didn't realise that was a legal term.

I didn’t realise that ‘being on glue’ is an actual thing that people did. I thought it was just another way of asking someone sarcastically whether they are high.

@AnotherMurkyDay bath salts?

You need a retro come back to a retro insult, personally I like ‘soz hard’ . I can’t even begin to think how I would respond to ‘soz hard’.
Don’t know if this was just a Manchester thing though???

I'm alright Jack is now overused too.

Have you been hit on the head by a yo-yo?

Have you overdosed on Brut?

Do you have a POG lodged in your brain?

Have you been up all night watching the test card?

@Reginabambina

Yes. "Have you been sniffing the bath salts again?" Said in much the same way as "are you on glue?" I'd never heard it until I came on here. It does appear to be less prevalent than the glue one but I've seen it many times.

Not sure if it works or not though.

The 'on glue' is a thread specific MN in joke.

I very much doubt that anyone uses it other than on MN with the specific joke in mind

Did you mean to be so rude is the shittest comeback of all time. I've seen people suggest it ok here as if it's some kind of clever retort but it's crap.

It was common with teenagers a few weeks ago but seems to have moved on now. Before that it was 'Are you OK?'

Reminds me of seeing Jack Dee live once. Someone shouted out something crap, and Jack replied: "Mate. You're doing it wrong. The point of heckling is to make me look a twat."

Brilliant. Now I remember why I liked Jack Dee so much.

@halfsoaked
The glue thing distracts me because all glue seems to be superglue these days and I'd be thinking about them sticking their nostrils shut.
thinking about it, my best come back is a bit pathetic really a sarcastic "how extremely kind of you to say so." so I'll be watching the rest of the thread for some more modern ones.

I used the phrase "it's an invitation, not a summons" in an actual real life conversation the other day.

@Cheerbear23 not just a Manchester thing...I genuinely love saying soz hard

That's a good Mumsnet phrase!