Would you find this rude? (Open plan driveway)

[smokeyfoxtails]

Not an AIBU more ‘would you/wouldn’t you’.

DH has been getting his blood pressure up recently as we’ve moved into a new house with open plan driveways as it’s a new build estate. There is a covenant stopping people from separating them. We’re in a mid Terrace and the deeds show that only one set of neighbours have a right of access over one of our driveways (double drive). Different materials are used on either driveway to differentiate between shared and private and there is a clear boundary line between our private driveway and our neighbour’s. Tarmac is private, bricked is has ‘right of access’ with no boundary line. The right of access is so that the neighbours can get in and out of their cars and they have respected our boundaries so far. Tarmac driveway is the one being used as a regular shortcut.

The other neighbours and their visitors have been constantly walking and driving over our private (tarmac) driveway. There is no real need for them to do so as they have ample space to walk up their own driveway and can easily move their car from the bottom of their drive to get their other one out BUT it won’t bother me until something gets damaged. It’s just time saving on their part. We have CCTV trained on the driveways that record motion so DH has been getting quite het up about it.

They have no legal right of access and the previous owner has confirmed that she never gave permission for them to do so they haven’t ‘gained the right’ iyswim. The house was empty for 4 months before we bought it so I presume they just got used to using our driveways as one of their cars was parked on it when we viewed the property. DH is getting wound up saying it’s rude and disrespectful without asking us as it’s our private property. To me it’s just a driveway and I’ve been trying to find similar MN threads for different perspectives but am struggling. I do think DH needs to calm down a bit until the neighbours are at risk of damaging our property, such as scratching our car with theirs as they squeeze out. The only issue I have with it is privacy as they walk right up past our living room window and often peer in.

Would you find it rude for your neighbours and their visitors to walk/drive all over your private driveway without asking permission? I think it is a little bit disrespectful but not the end of the world!

Can only attach 3 at once. There were several items piled to start with but they’ve since moved a few. Tricky to see everything as my camera doesn’t record for very long. Not sure what all the dirt has been created by

If you're looking at buying plants for a demarcation get things like berberis, big thorns, we put some along a fence to stop people using our garden as a short cut over the fence into their's, instead of walking round the corner!
When we had an open plan garden I got fed up of the postman/person cutting across under the window instead of using the drive, it was only a very short drive, a car's length.

@mrsBtheparker thinking about getting these for under the living room window but unsure of what to put down the side of the driveway boundary without it looking strange and out of place

They are being so unreasonable that I think you need to make it obvious why you are putting planters out the front so I wouldn't worry about them looking out of place down the side as well. Once they've got the message you can rethink what would look best.

”Update: it’s getting worse quite rapidly. Soon they will be sat on my driveway on deckchairs when I’m not in!”

Yes. And one day you’ll come home and find a caravan on your driveway.

But someone must have legal enforcement powers. It may be the developer or it may be the council. The developer will presumably know.

I don’t mind the driving, walking or whatever as much now. I just don’t appreciate loitering, storing items or creating a mess on my property! Ordering the planters now at least it gives me an excuse to grow some lovely flowers as the back garden is fully paved with fake grass.

I have to say that your picture of someone walking diagonally two feet on to your property captioned Another visitor brazenly happily striding up my driveway instead of walking a few feet more along the pavement. makes you look like a complete and utter nightmare of a neighbour. What harm is she possibly doing?

OP, you are clearly letting this absolutely consume you. Why not relax and enjoy Sunday lunch with your family rather than checking updates on your phone about what is going on on your front drive? I really think you're losing your sense of perspective here.

If your neighbour comes across these photos they will, quite rightly, be massively freaked out.

You’re sounding quite unhinged now. I’m wondering how you behaved in your last place.

I agree with pp - Berberis and Holly are excellent deterrents, all down your boundary line but on your property as an alternative to fence or hedge. But do talk to the developers too although I doubt they'll do anything about CF neighbours.

Something like this, OP?

Not sure how I’m unhinged for being annoyed at neighbours making a mess on my private property that is clearly mapped out on the deeds I’ve shared. Returned home and they haven’t cleaned it up. Looks like sand and brick debris

Clearly legally my property! Really can’t see what’s so unhinged about it or how I’m in the wrong in any way. World’s gone mad. Would I be seen as any different if they weren’t open plan and there was a small wall there? Bet I wouldn’t be getting called unhinged if they were jumping my wall or fence. Just because it’s open plan doesn’t make it not my property

I'd be just as upset as you OP. They are clearly CFs. If they own the caravan I wonder if that is allowed by the developers?

sunshinesupermum - The developer will know who has the legal power to enforce the covenant, if it comes to legal action. It’ll either be the developer, the council, or the OP. It would be great news for the OP if it’s the developer or the council because they may well be able to resolve it without legal action - just a firm letter to all residents reminding everyone of the terms of the covenant.

Look you're not unhinged, just ignore the daft posters who like to denigrate on Mumsnet. They're clearly taking the piss out of you. Have you got 2 cars? Is there no possibility of blocking that drive permanently with an old banger?
Otherwise push back hard ( but you shouldn't have to if they were decent people) and get the planters in pdq

The rude neighbours are taking the piss out of you, that is.

Sweep the debris down towards the windows and then sweep it over on to their side.

I would not be happy about this either. But you've got to start by talking to them!

You don't need to talk to them about putting planters on your own driveway OP.

MargotMoon - not necessarily. If the OP contacts the developers, they or the Council may be able to deal with it in an official, impersonal way.

Ten to one it’s the responsibility of either the developer or the council.

Could you or your DH (or both of you) actually go and speak to them about this?

I don't think you're unreasonable to be pissed off about this but I think it's slightly odd that you're clearly sitting at home watching all this happen and posting pictures here with captions, and haven't gone out and asked them politely to get their crap off your drive???

Is your tarmac section two different colours? Or is that a trick of the camera light?
I wonder whether they think the half of your tarmac section thatd nearest their house is actually theirs or a joint section because of this slightly different colour?

I understand where your coming from. Had no end of issues with neighburs over parking in previous houses. Thankfully not in my current one! So I understand how infuriating it can be!

But what it boils down to is that you do really need to (calmly) speak to them about this. Xx

Honestly I think they don’t think they are doing anything wrong.

What you think they are doing is a different story, and I’m not convinced you’re in the right to be so bothered by this when you haven’t actually spoken to them or said that you don’t want them walking past windows, or using their drive to put building materials and worse not clear up behind themselves.

Go and have a calm chat with them and explain that you find the walking past your window bothersome and intrusive and that you would ask them not to put things on your drive without either (a) agreeing it with you and (b) making sure things are left tidy as they were