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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Have I behaved badly

107 replies

mimp · 05/03/2020 15:00

I work for a small company think 5-6 staff. Director has been off for a couple of weeks. Business is slow at the moment. One of the guys just sat around for the two weeks and one day I caught him fast asleep. He didn't even try to look for work do those odd jobs that never get done.
Director is back work still slow and I knew he had to think about letting a couple of people go I told him about this staff member. I feel awful and I don't know why I did it but his behaviour just astonished me. The lack of any effect! He will be let go this week or next I have been told. Feel guilty but it's a bit late for that. I actually think I am a bitch. AIBU ...what would you have done?

OP posts:

TiredMum10 · 06/03/2020 10:51

It was the line managers duty to report this. I personally think you did a very horrible thing. But that's for your conscience to deal with.

Bertieandernie · 06/03/2020 10:54

Wow I hate people like you... what a snake 🐍

NoSauce · 06/03/2020 11:06

Wow I hate people like you... what a snake

So you’d be happy to be laid off instead of your colleague that sleeps at work?

How bizarre.

Alsohuman · 06/03/2020 11:09

So you’d be happy to be laid off instead of your colleague that sleeps at work?

Given that they do entirely different jobs in different departments, that doesn’t even come into it. The line manager should have handled it, going over their head and undermining them is shitty behaviour.

buckeejit · 06/03/2020 11:13

Yanbu. I'm baffled by all these people who think it's ok to sleep on the job.

Maybe a lot of people are slackers but imo you should be accountable for your actions. You didn't lie about him. Who expects to retain a job with that behaviour?

WwfLeopard · 06/03/2020 11:15

Talk about divide and conquer 🤷‍♀️

JustDanceAddict · 06/03/2020 11:17

I wouldn’t have done it, but you prob did it to save your own skin! Maybe I would’ve told the director what I’d done rather than what someone else hadn’t done.
I’m often not that busy at work but I always find bits to do as don’t want anyone to think I’m skiving. I prefer being busy btw it’s just the nature of the role that quiet periods happen.

AndwhenyougetthereFoffsomemore · 06/03/2020 11:20

Hummm, I've worked in a small company and dh currently does. If one person isn't pulling their weight it's ridiculously frustrating - esp if everyone else is running around being proactive to keep the company afloat. Assuming you are reasonably senior, I think you're actions - although harsh - are reasonable: in a small business, you take a different type of responsibility imo. I can't believe that it was only your comment that brought the axe down, although it may certainly have contributed. Those saying YABU - what if another, more hardworking person had been sacked instead, and this guy kept on - surely that wouldn't be fair?

AndwhenyougetthereFoffsomemore · 06/03/2020 11:21

you're = your...

NoSauce · 06/03/2020 11:22

Given that it’s a tiny company with 5/6 staff working there and it’s very quiet and there’s likely to be redundancies, only a fool would say nothing!

dontdisturbmenow · 06/03/2020 11:23

One day fast asleep means absolutely nothing at all. Maybe both his wife and child was poorly and he was up all night looking after both. Maybe he is riddle with worry about his finances at home and that keeps him up all night.

Or maybe he suffers from sleep apnea without knowing it. Or his mum has dementia and ran out of the house in the night and he had to go and look for her.

There are many reasons why someone might fall asleep at work and a one off unless they are in a role that includes security and health and safety should be investigated rather than dismiss.

Badmouthing someone for falling asleep once behind their back without trying to understand the reason is pretty low.

NoSauce · 06/03/2020 11:56

One of the guys just sat around for the two weeks and one day I caught him fast asleep. He didn't even try to look for work do those odd jobs that never get done

Bit different to falling asleep for one day.

Talkingmouse · 06/03/2020 12:01

Totally did the right thing.

You are in a small company that is struggling.

The only way for the company to thrive is all 4/5/6 of you take leadership and find ways to drive the business forward.

If 1 person is doing f.a. then the whole business and everyone’s jobs are more precarious.

You did the right thing. Now work out how to grow the business...

crapette · 06/03/2020 12:21

Why is it "bitchy" to report someone for going to sleep at work.

Is the OP allowed to go into work and go to sleep? I very much doubt it, so why should anyone else be paid for sleeping at work?

Sirzy · 06/03/2020 12:27

Surely if your going to report to anyone you report to that persons line manager? rubbing straight to the top is what makes it really bitchy!

If she had issues she should have spoken to his line manager and then let him deal with it as needed

Original poster

mimp · 06/03/2020 12:55

I need to clarify. Said person that was asleep this was not the first time. I have seen this ALOT over the last 2 years. Coming in to work so pissed he is throwing up in the loo and stinks of beer. Pretending to the director it's a bug and needs to go home. I have never in 2 years said a word. I had spoken to his line manager particulary about the drinking it's not safe to turn up for work in that state. He's very young still lives at home has no responsibilities and there was hope over the last two years he would "grow up" .
I know I said the right thing I just feel bad about it.
I also learnt recently that even though his Line Manager has driven him to work and back for 2 years as he can't drive, he has never once paid him petrol money. He was taking advantage of his good nature in too many ways.
Yes I am harsh but we need team players on board. Yes if things get worse I will be next but at least the guys still there will now have a chance to keep working.
It was a tough call I was asked directly how things had been when Director was away we discussed MANY things this was one point that I needed to be brought to his attention even if it was a horrible thing to do.

OP posts:

Dontforgetyourbrolly · 06/03/2020 13:36

I would have done the same as you , its place of work not a charity . If that makes me snitch then so be it , I've got bills to pay and I work very hard.

Ellisandra · 06/03/2020 13:38

Again, that’s just totally different from your OP. Quite apart from the backstory on his 2 years of sackable behaviour, in your OP it comes across that you volunteered the info, now you clarify that you were asked.

If you had posted this originally I would have said - you absolutely did the right thing, and yes I’d feel like a bitch too, but it’s still the right thing.

Pursefirst · 06/03/2020 13:42

Even without the backstory OP, YADNBU.

If i caught someone sleeping at work (!) they would be hauled in for a disciplinary at the very least. Work isn't a fucking charity, you are paid to do a job and if you can't do it, there are plenty of hard-working people who can and will.

Honeybee85 · 06/03/2020 13:48

I am with you on this one OP.
If he behaved so badly over the past 2 years, clearly he didn’t give a shit about his job.
So it’s better for the company if he’s let go then someone who actually cared about their job.
And don’t let the pp who are calling you snake etc. get to you: you were asked and gave an honest answer. You didn’t go to the director by your own initiative to complain about this guy.
Imagine how you’d have felt if you had said that you had no idea and they’d choosen you or a hardworking collegue to let go. Surely that would have felt as a much worse outcome.

GiveHerHellFromUs · 06/03/2020 14:03

The latest updates a bit different to just moaning about him doing the bare minimum like you were yesterday

PhilCornwall1 · 06/03/2020 14:06

Well, that's one hell of a drip feed if ever I saw one!!

iheartislesofwight · 06/03/2020 14:19

the snoozers own fault, i wouldn't pay my staff to sleep on the job and i would want to know about it, not sure about people calling you a bitch though, presume they would be okay if staff slacked off, skived and they were paying the wages

wornoutboots · 06/03/2020 14:26

if he can spend time asleep while the rest of you try to save the company then he deserves to be got rid of anyway.

Goldrill · 06/03/2020 14:31

If you hadn't said anything and someone else had been given the shove... how bad would you feel then?!

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