Hotel choice of relatives.

[Bookoffacts]

I'm going to the 65th birthday of my DF in a town on south coast.
My family want me to stay in a particular hotel. I don't want to stay there. I have valid reasons and no other family are staying in that hotel. I want to book a hotel further afield. I'm independent and pay all costs.

This will make things awkward as I always have to go along with their plans or appear like a petulant child. I'm sick of it and but do not wish to rock the boat. I just want to be able to make my own decisions. I'm 38 and have kids.

Aibu?

Why do they want you to stay there?

All seems rather odd.

You are a grown up and can choose your own hotel! Why do they want you to stay there?

Are you paying for yourselves, if so your choice.

Why do they want you to stay there? I'd just tell them you've already booked the one you want.

Why do they want you to stay there when no other family members are staying there?

It's your money, so stay wherever you like!!

Why do they care where you stay?

So make your own decisions, it's not hard. Why does that make you a 'petulant child'. Just tell them you don't want to stay there.

Give them a benign reason if the real reasons are embarrassing/upsetting for whatever reason. Tell them you don't like the breakfast, bedding, carpets, whatever or prefer a certain aspect of the other hotel.

Are they on commission?

Eh? What's it got to do with them?

Why does it matter to them what hotel you stay at? rather controlling!

Petulant child....
Not a doormat...

Nobody else is staying there so why are they insisting you do?
Unless they’re paying book where you like.

This will continue for as long as you allow it.

I'm afraid it really is that simple

Book somewhere else where you want to go. When they ask "oh well, too late"

If they are not paying, and not even staying there so it's not a case of all having breakfast together, etc, then you are a grown up do as you want.

Why do you have to stay there if nobody else is?

Why do you care what they think? You're paying, your choice. As you said, you're a grown woman, therefore you shouldn't be swayed by their foolishness.

I just want to be able to make my own decisions.

The only one stopping you from doing so is yourself.

If you don't feel able to just tell them, perhaps say you have booked and paid for another hotel and got it cheaper as its non refundable.

Why do they want you to stay there and why don't you want to stay there? What a strange thing to be arguing about.

Are you an adult?
If yes, book your own bloody hotel room, quit with the lame drama. Honestly, why do you need anyone’s approval to book your own hotel room .

If no, then stay with adults!

It’s time to rock the boat OP.

From your OP it sounds as though your family are always telling you what to do? It’s as though you’re not supposed to have your own ideas/wishes/wants/needs, they just expect you to go along with it. And you sound sick of it.

I grew up in that environment and I was 38 when I put my foot down and made it clear I was doing my own thing. I’ll be honest it didn’t go down well with members of my family and I’m now non contact some. But I feel free to do as I choose, I don’t feel as though I’m in a battle and my stress levels are in a good place.

Unless there's a massive drip feed coming, you must know you're not being unreasonable, surely?

Just book your choice of hotel and tell them afterwards, like most people would.

Why does it matter?