To be going to bed straight after the kids every night?

[BabCNesbitt]

Two DCs, youngest has just turned 3. They’re usually in bed by about 8 each night and when DC2 is finally asleep, I get into bed and crash out because I’m exhausted, every bloody night. I get up at 6am and work four days a week, but DH is great and does equal shares of getting the kids ready for school/nursery and ready for bed, and does most of the cooking too.

I went to the GP a few months ago because I was feeling so tired and bleh all the time and apparently blood tests showed that everything was fine but that my iron stores were a bit low (told this by the receptionist over the phone, no figures given). I’ve been taking Holland and Barrett iron supplements since then but I’m still bloody knackered all the time. Is this just normal for a mid-forties woman who gets up at 6am? Or WIBU to pester the GP again for more tests or something like that?

And I don’t think they tested for thyroid function? But yeah, my results were just “everything’s fine, take an iron supplement” over the phone, so.

@BabCNesbitt I do go out to the cinema with friends about once a fortnight but I’m pretty much fit for nothing the next day (although come to think of it, I’m pretty brain foggy most of the time at the moment)."

Have you considered the possibility that it could be fibromyalgia?
My MIL has this and she is the same that if she spends a day out at the cinema, a walk with the dogs, shopping etc she can't move for at least a day or two after. She has constant brain fog aswell, she also finds that she has to take regular naps throughout the day too.

Maybe worth looking up on the NHS website and have a look at the symptoms, if you feel you it could be a possibilty, definitely go back to your GP and ask about it.

Hope you feel better soon! X

Oh, and work is not that exhausting - it’s pretty boring!

Do you do any exercise and do you drink enough water?

Is it fatigue (if you've ever had flu that horrible drained feeling) or tiredness (like you haven't slept properly for days?)

By 8pm it’s kind of both!

When I was 23 I used to do 40h across 4 days working in a nursery and then on Fridays commute 2h each way to uni - I went to bed straight after dinner most weeknights!

I think sometimes life just goes through particularly tiring bits.

I would go to your gp and ask for accurate results and what doses of iron tablets are right for you
I was taking a low dose before going on a ferrous sulphate iron tablet and I noticed I didn't suffer the late afternoon hitting a wall feeling. Still tired but mentally more than physically depending on the day.
I thrive on 10hrs sleep as well, I do not think that amount of sleeps anything unusual I think lucky you if you can get that much.

Could be perimenopause.

You need to get a print out of your bloods from the gp!! If your result falls within a very wide normal range then it doesn't highlight for the gp and well no offence but the receptionist isn't an expert.

An example I had was my iron store came back normal, when I got the print out it was an 8 for example, the normal range was 8 to 24. While I was technically normal, 8 was not normal for me. I highlighted this to the gp and was put on meds.

I keep an excel spreadsheet of every blood test I've ever done and monitor my own bloods. I'd recommend it to anyone.

I'd have your thyroid levels checked too. Do you often feel cold? any change to the texture of your hair? weight gain/loss?
All subtle signs of thyroid issues. My friend had your symptoms- perpetually tired and this is what it turned out to be- thyroid imbalance

I was also going to suggest peri menopause due to the tiredness and brain fog.

Definitely get your thyroid checked, i was cold and shattered all the time, even after a 12 hour sleep, and it was my thyroid.

Tbh Dd is 3 and I’m still pretty damn tired all the time, but it has helped!

Frequently cold - it’s a running joke at home about my wanting to stand right in front of the radiators. And I’ve been avoiding going out running lately because of being so tired and it’s too bloody cold!

OP you are very busy with the kids and work etc but have you a little time early evening to go for a quick jog/run? It sounds daft but it works for me and makes me sleep more soundly and feeling refreshed next morning (I thought my friend was taking the pi$$ when she suggested this when I had the same problem as you) it only takes me 1/2 an hour and I started by quick walking and slowly building up to a run over time...good luck x

Ops ...cross post op I see you have already tried running xx

Any exercise?
If they’re in bed around 8, by time you’ve changed, teeth etc must be closer to 8.30/8.45.
And then up at 6am

Sounds pretty sensible to me.

I’m up at 6 to run. In bed by 9 absolute latest, light off by 9.30 absolute latest

The key is whether you’re still exhausted during the day despite a good amount of sleep.

And what’s the quality of the your sleep?

Is there any chance that you're pregnant? Because feeling freezing all the time, sleeping/feeling exhausted all the time and feeling like your brain isn't working properly are all things I get in the first trimester of pregnancy...

Sounds like me!

Also suspect perimenpause

I'm the same as you and I'm in for a blood test this morning for the usual suspects - thyroid, iron, folates, b12. I only have one dc5 and work 40 hrs a week, 2 nights a week I have to work late so don't get home to 9.30, on those 2 nights I fall asleep around 11 after eating, changing etc but the other 5 nights a week I am asleep around 8.30-9 and wake between 6.30-7 every day, a lot of the time I still feel tired at work, yawning a lot.

I bought a Fitbit and checking my sleep data out it seems that although I'm sleeping a lot, it's mostly light sleep and not enough deep sleep or continuity of deep sleep but how can I change that? Or what's causing that? Who knows. have never had b12 or iron checked before but had thyroid checked years ago and was fine then.

Is there any chance that you're pregnant?

DH and I are barely awake together after the kids are in bed - DEFINITELY no chance of that!

Also have a Fitbit and my sleep is apparently “fair” every night, for what that’s worth.

You may need more magnesium. Not only does magnesium give your more energy it helps you have a more restful sleep

What is your quality of sleep like? If you have a fitbit how much deep sleep are you getting? I go to bed at 8 and wake at 6 but I have a 4 month old who is waking a lot during the night.

I used to be the same, when I started back to work after mat leave I would be in bed by 7ish! My DH does work away but still, it was a bit ridiculous and such a rush to get everything done in the short window of picking DS up, coming home, doing dinner etc and everything ready for tomorrow. I found iron helped which I see you're already taking, more water (I was drinking hardly any fluids which I know is really bad!), and eating better. Not saying you aren't doing those, just for me it helped. Also going for a walk at lunchtime (no real opportunity any other time during the week) seemed to have somehow made a difference.

Sorry just read your last post. If your sleep quality is fair despite getting 10 hours it sounds like the quality of sleep is poor. Some ideas to get more deep sleep here
community.fitbit.com/t5/Sleep-Better/Let-s-Talk-About-Deep-Sleep-and-How-to-Get-More/td-p/2096223

are you getting quality sleep? 10 hours of sleep as an adult and still exhausted doesn't sound right. Has the Dr checked your thyroid, have they suggested a sleep study?

Things you can do straight away- i find the iron liquid supplements far better than tablets. Take B12. Also get outside every day, even if it's just a 15 minute walk around the block. This time of year can be exhausting as our body clocks are all over the place as we never see day light.
Also some gentle exercise can give you a burst of energy- i'd never survive my high stress job without a brisk walk in the afternoon.
another- slightly harder one- be mindful of sugar and caffeine in your diet. Energy drinks and coffees have the opposite effect long term than the pick me up they intend to be.