Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ban family from visiting (coronavirus)

56 replies

joystir59 · 01/03/2020 07:44

SIL and BIL are planning to visit end March when they have returned from a cruise around Malaysia, Thailand, Vietnam. My OH is currently having chemo for cancer. I have asked them.to wait at least 14 days between returning to the UK from their cruise and coming to visit.

OP posts:
Mummyoflittledragon · 01/03/2020 08:29

Yanbu
I also think 2 weeks isn’t enough. Someone became symptomatic after 24 days. I think there was someone with a slightly longer incubation period. Not sure.

KittenVsBox · 01/03/2020 08:29

I'm another one who doesn't get the coronavirus panic, but in your case YADNBU.

Echobelly · 01/03/2020 08:30

You're being totally reasonable and I'm sure they'll understand.

catpoooffender · 01/03/2020 08:31

@potteringalong I don't think OP is scared silly, she's just weighing up the risks and deciding to take a cautious approach given her DHs health.

JinglingHellsBells · 01/03/2020 08:34

I’m not saying be less cautious, I’m saying don’t scare yourself silly with a risk that isn’t as big as your head has made it.

You are the one being silly @PotteringAlong

There are risks across the population as a whole and there are risks to the individual. They are different.

Anyone who has been to Asia is on the list of possible carriers/ infected . In some cases the illness is not showing for more than 14 days.

Saying someone might get it in their local supermarket is, statistically, not as likely as someone who has returned from Asia.

And even if it were, anyone who is having chemo might well decide not to go to sainsburys if there is a risk.

You've got weird logic.

SpeckledyHen · 01/03/2020 08:38

In your circumstances I would probably do the same , and I’m usually very chilled about stuff .

cologne4711 · 01/03/2020 08:45

Not unreasonable OP especially with the cruise ship element. Even if they don't get CV19 they could be harbouring some other nasty virus which you won't want coming anywhere near your OH.

What is it with cruises? Breeding grounds for germs and terrible for the environment. They need to be stopped in my view.

Original poster
joystir59 · 01/03/2020 08:45

Thank you for the responses. The reason for telling them now is that they are very organised plan ahead people and I don't want them booking travel and accommodation near us that they might have to rearrange/cancel. I did hesitate to say anything because I've been trying to persuade sil in particular to visit OH (her sister), as she hasn't been since finding out she has cancer. And now I'm pushing back on her visiting too soon (OH asked me to push back) for fear of infection. I'm sure they will understand. We tried to dissuade them from going on the cruise at all, but they would have lost a lot of money

OP posts:
Original poster
joystir59 · 01/03/2020 08:46

They won't be staying in our house as we do not have a spare room, as elderly mil lives with us.

OP posts:
netstaller · 01/03/2020 08:47

I'd say a little over 14 days just to be safe. YANBU

diddl · 01/03/2020 08:51

I'd also want hem to leave it for a month tbh.

Chances of having coronavirus are probably very small, but why take the risk that they are incubating that or anything else?

bellinisurge · 01/03/2020 08:54

Totally reasonable in your situation. Hope all going well with your dh.

GnomeDePlume · 01/03/2020 08:56

YANBU

It isnt just coronavirus but any other bug or beasty they could have picked up on board.

WhentheRabbitsWentWild · 01/03/2020 09:00

No OP , YANBU .

Selfsettling3 · 01/03/2020 09:02

Even if corona wasn’t around cruise ships are notorious for passing on illnesses so it wouldn’t be a great idea for them to visit someone having chemo.

AriadnesFilament · 01/03/2020 09:05

Based on updates, I’d also say more than 14 days too, and YANBU

lljkk · 01/03/2020 09:08

excessive imho, but I would totally respect your wishes if you asked OP. I get why you want to minimise the risks you can control.

Standrewsschool · 01/03/2020 09:09

Yes, at least fourteen days, They can always communicate by phone or FaceTiming.

ExhaustedGrinch · 01/03/2020 09:10

Another one here saying more than 14 days and more like a month. It's not just the risk of covid19 but other kinds of nasty bugs that people can pick up on cruise ships, your husband is vulnerable healthwise and I think they're bonkers to even suggest it!

happycamper11 · 01/03/2020 09:11

Beard on the title I was expecting to say yabu bjt after reading definitely not... I'd actually suggest much longer than 14 days - this seems to be incubating for a long time in some cases

happycamper11 · 01/03/2020 09:12

*based not beardBlush

Thisisworsethananticpated · 01/03/2020 09:13

I think that’s very reasonable OP
And if they don’t agree they are fools

Spudlet · 01/03/2020 09:14

Given that your oh is having chemo and given that cruise ships appear to be essentially large floating incubators for every germ going, I’d be asking them to wait a bit even without coronavirus as a factor.

Lilimoon · 01/03/2020 09:14

If I was in your situation I would say 1 month. YADNBU.

HedghogDrama · 01/03/2020 09:14

There is also the possibility that the cruise could be cancelled. I don't think you ABU if you tell them now about not visiting.