To be upset that he's Constantly comparing me to his gf?

[sadnessx]

So my ex husband who I have children with is always making sly digs towards me about how different and better his gf is and it's really getting me down. Last week he said to me that his gf paints her house all by herself without the help of him and why can't I paint my house myself and said I make excuses not to. Then this week he goes on to say that his gf washes her sons ( not his child) uniform every single night and said why can't I wash our sons uniform every single night. He's always making me feel like a failure and that she's better mum than me. I'm just so down and depressed about it.

Tell oh yes and why do I not give a fuck what you think. Ohh yes that's it your an ex an ex for a reason, your a manipulative, control freak who I tolerate for our child. Now fuck off and go home to your girl friend. Don't question me anymore. Just drop your son off and go. X

Limit contact with him, limit conversations.

Maybe what he is saying is true, maybe it is not. Personally, I would ignore it. roll your eyes, walk off while he is speaking if it is safe to do so.

Or perhaps you could just say 'Well, that is excellent, it means you have more time to help your child out, help me as I am parenting your child while you are with your new girlfriend."

And completely agree with BelieveInPeople "Does he paint his house and wash his child’s uniform every night? No? thought not, so he can’t think it’s that important. These are not things to measure your worth against, ignore him!"

That he needs to put you down in this way says volumes about his present situation! (Good save in getting free of him.)

Happy people who are pleased with their relationships do not need to behave like this.

(Good save in getting free of him. He sound horrible. No wonder his poor gf prefers painting her house and even over-washing her son's clothes than spending more time with him.)

I'd just say 'Oh fantastic, good for her!'
Keep it really mundane and like you could not be any less arsed by his comments.

I wouldn't come back with stuff about orgasms and that, it just shows that it's bothering you and gives him more leverage to be a twat.

As much as it hurts, comments like 'She sounds great!' are perfect.

Just reply with, ‘Ah, but is she happy?’.
I am (big smile).

And be happy. Whatever it takes, new interests, time spent with friends, old and new, time spent by yourself, try and focus on you and your son. Push the rest, including your ex away, make it barely background noise. Have faith that your beat days are yet to come.

The best revenge is being happy. Make it your mission.

He's using his new gf as a kind of leverage against you.

I think the easiest way to defuse it is to just agree she is fab, sounds great, really talented etc. It will take the wind out of his sails and give him nothing to use against you.

You need to change your mindset about him.
Why do you care what he says? Some very good responses further up.
She paints her house? Well fucking done.
Be happy you don't have to live with the bastard anymore.
He is doing it to get a rise out of you.
Don't give him the satisfaction.