To feel anxiety-ridden by Joe Wick's new speech on parental anxiety?

[AllesAusLiebe]

Anyone else seen it on Instagram?

I only heard about this guy on here a few months ago and started listening to him, which I now regret!

Basically, he's created a 'helpful' video to respond to messages he's received from anxious parents in response to his numerous posts documenting his jetset lifestyle.

He claims that anxiety holds many people back from travelling with kids and eating out with kids and through that, you're missing out on 'making precious memories' (cringe). He claims that eating out with his young kids is great fun and they're not phased by sleeping in noisy bars(what?!) and restaurants because he and his wife have never enforced a routine and have been gleefully relaxed on their magical parenting journey.

He references being anxious about choking, jetlag and overseas diseases (all of which I'm guilty of) and dismisses these fears, too. They're actually very real fears, in my opinion. (Particularly having seen numerous people on my flight last week wearing face protection . . . !)

I only watched the damn video because I am an anxious parent with a son who has been tough going from day one and I thought it might help me chill a little. Instead, I'm feeling really conflicted. Part of me is pissed that this tool has made me feel lousy for not embracing some of the opportunities with my son that were available but part of me thinks it was a genuine attempt to help and I'm being too sensitive.

I'll try and link it if I can, if anyone is interested.

If theres one thing I've learned in life, never ever listen to celebs giving parenting advice

This is utter wank. What a patronising git! Yeah cos we’ve all got the spare cash to do a five or 10 hour flight then go chill in the hotel before making memories on the beach. It’s simply a social media sham and I genuinely do not understand how grown ups can be taken in by this shit and these people make money through it. I would hate to be his wife and have to be the princess of perfectness to suit “the brand”.

OP - YANBU to be anxious about your child but YABU to watch this shit. I understand your point about not knowing til you watch so just don’t watch any of these “influencer” videos. Speak to a real life professional, charity or therapist type person about your anxiety if you feel it is holding you back.

I don't like him much - I had a very easy first baby - I was very smug about our parenting and then it all went a bit to shit with a tricky second one. He needs to pipe down on things he doesn't know anything about, i.e. mental health. I don't think he's even very good at what he does - does he specialise in fitness, or nutrition, or parenting, etc - he needs to stay in his lane, he can't be an expert in everything!

whilst I continue to live the exact same life I had before

Maybe. You can't do this when you have kids.

Yabu for following that twat anyway.

Is Joe Wicks that twat who claims to be a fitness expert?
Oh, feel free to ignore him. He's a bit of an idiot- cant you tell?

Also, in order to get his daughter to eat all of the kale and quinoa slop recipes he feeds her, he doesn't offer any snacks or alternatives. So she quite regularly goes from breakfast time until 8.30pm without having eaten anything in order to 'prove his theory' that if she's hungry enough she will eat it. He is essentially starving her for hours on end, and he actively promotes this as his 'weaning advice'.
Once she was crying at 9pm on Instagram stories because she hadn't eaten since 9am and she didn't like his recipe, she wanted the toast that he and his wife were eating. He refused to give her the toast (she's not allowed it) and was about to put her to bed with a bottle, but I think after messages from his followers he reluctantly made her an omelette.
That's the part he is prepared to brag about on Instagram. I wonder what he does behind closed doors...

OP, if you must watch this sort of guff, try to remember that you are being sold something. It might be a book or a DVD, or just some sort of pay per click arrangement, but somebody is trying to make money from you.
It isn't about helping, it's about profiting.I find it's easier to not be affected if I can remember that.

He’s lucky his kids have listened to his advice on parenting.
My children didn’t read the right books. My eldest didn’t know that if I took her out to bars etc she was supposed to fall asleep. She was a party animal and would not sleep unless she was on her own in a darkish room. If there was anyone around, she wanted interaction and fought sleep with grim determination. And then she got grumpy. And then was grumpy the next day too because she was tired. I wish he’d been around to tell her where she was going wrong.
(Might have helped her nursery too because they had nightmares getting her to nap, at a stage when she was still young enough to really need it. Wouldn’t give in with so much to do, then got massively overtired. But as I had to work, having her at home in her own cot wasn’t an option.)
See also swaddling. Must do it, helps baby feel secure. Yup. Again, DD1, read the book please. She just screamed and screamed until she was sick when swaddled and stopped immediately when released. Having escaped confinement and arrived in the big wide world, she wanted freedom to wave her arms, thank you very much. No further restraining required.

You have to parent the baby you have, not the baby someone else has. Advice can be helpful because it can give you ideas for things you hadn’t thought of, but you try something and it doesn’t work so you try something else. He is not a child care expert. He is just some bloke who has a child. I wouldn’t take the views of a bloke in the supermarket as gospel. He is no different.
I did take babies on long haul, because DH comes from overseas. The holiday was fine, the flights were hell. 24 hours flying with a travel sick infant anyone?
And anyway, I’m old enough to remember Joe Wicks in EastEnders and can’t help but think of a stroppy teenager when I hear his name, so I’m not predisposed to think he’s got anything useful to say!

He is a MAN who is now a father and therefore knows all the secrets to parenting dontcherknow.
He probably has a stressed out anxious team of helpers dealing with a sleep deprived baby keeping all choking hazards out of reach.

He's being smug. Honestly Instagram can be smoke and mirrors. Look at all the instamum twattery. It's all fake.

Fuxking Instagram stars strike again. Chef gone super nanny. Like shite. I wonder is HE or his NANNY is to thank for a content baby! One does not fit all and he needs to realise that!

Wickes should try eating out with a kid with multiple food allergies. Totally relaxing! Dick head.

Of course I'd love to travel abroad with my 2yo daughter. But the anxiety over her food would absolutely ruin it for me. It's staycations for now.

God I hate that jumped up twat.

YANBU

I bet he takes a live in nanny abroad with him who does most of the work. You can't keep up with people like that "do this, do that - it's the best way" unless you have the same income and the same choices. I learned that from the organic, scandi community. It's supposed to be all "clean, green, ethical, natural" but there's a really dark bitchy, show-offy, preachy fakeness to a lot of it.

Xpost @Flufferbum

I bet it's true though. No one knows what goes on behind the scenes.

He's a reasonably successful PT who has built his business on social media. Who gives an actual fuck what he says about parenting? People only come out of their lanes if we let them.

This sort of shit is why I quit Instagram.

People have commented that they think I should chill etc. But you know what? No. I won't chill. I'm keeping my kids safe!

I feel exactly the same. I’ve been criticised for years for being too cautious. Mostly from other lax parents and lazy partners. I’ve apologized for it over and over, as if it’s a bad thing. You know I have recently realized I’m just a bloody good parent!

@darceybussell oh no that sounds awful!

This is the guy who had to be told that his newborn baby is crying because they want cuddles. And after reading what @darceybussell has posted, he sounds abusive.

I hope you're ok OP. No doubt you're a far better parent than he is.

(by the way I love your name @YukoandHiro, got the song in my head now)

Op
Instagram as pp have said is fake.
People will say and do anything to make money and get attention.
If your anxiety is spiralling please talk to your gp and also for any concerns about your dc.
Ther is no parenting manual, no one size fits all.
Unfollow and live your life without trying to match up to others.

He's a numpty!!!!

DS has a routine but I take him out and he does sleep in restaurants and noisy bars, but only because my grandparents own a bar, so he's in there once a week and I have a HUGE and NOISY family, so even going to people's houses there is a lot of noise, he's had to learn to sleep through it and he did quite fast. But sometimes it doesn't work, he's been known to refuse to sleep, feed or just be his normal happy self. If I was a social media influencer, not a chance I'd be showing those evenings!!!!

I call bullshit on him saying they have no routine, a baby will create their own routine even if you don't initially see it.
My experience here is that I wanted ds to nap at 10am as he has me up at 7am after his 4am feed I need to nap he won't nap until 11ish, so now that's his morning routine.

Please please please don't let celebs that have decided they are parenting experts make you feel worse. They are human just like you, doing the best they can, just like you EXCEPT they only show the good and "perfect" bits. No one has it easy at all.

I deleted him after his first holiday, when he said our baby is happy/ relaxed/ chilled because we are bollocks.

"It's just made me wonder . . . have I created a kid who is pretty difficult to deal with because I've been so inflexible..."
A gentle admonishment to Stop That Right Now.
He sounds like an absolute tool.