To not upgrade the phone?

[CrackedPhoneScreen]

DS (14) has a phone with a cracked screen. He is one year into a two-year contract. It has insurance but when i called a couple of months ago they say they don't replace for cosmetic damage. Previous to finding this out, he was happy for me to just try and replace it on the insurance.

So he went researching and found a phone for £70 no sim. It is the cheapest smartphone available no sim on Amazon.

He now wants this phone. We are in the red so this would not be a small purchase for us.

Complicating this fact is the fact that at Christmas my phone (which I had used with a cracked screen for about a year) completely died. So I got a simfree one from amazon at the start of January. (I had no insurance, I have been arguing my phone contract since August with a company that got closed down and taken over)

This died last week as well - it wouldnt turn on. I am not having much luck with phones! and am now also arguing for a refund from Amazon for this.

I finally resolved my dispute with the phone contract people and they offered me a new phone on a smaller contract - so actually saving money. Which we are trying to do generally - see above!

So, DS has, as he sees it, two options.

1. I try AGAIN with his insurance as tbf, the crack has got worse - although it can still be used, unlike my phone

2. get us to buy the £70 phone.

He is insisting on option 2 and is no longer happy with option one, saying that as soon as android 10 comes out it will be obsolete.

He says "well you are getting a new phone every month" and cant see the difference between an adult with children/work and needing to be contactable, the fact it was free the second time with a contract that SAVED US MONEY as phones completely dead and a teen with a cracked phone!

AIBU not upgrading the phone ?

(to add, this would be the SECOND time we replaced on insurance. He lost his last phone overseas. And other DS also had a phone with a worse cracked screen for far longer and didnt complain, which was also eventually replaced with the basic insurance!)

(to add further, yes, perhaps we should all just be banned from phones altogether!)

I would tell him plainly that my phone is nothing to do with him. If his is usable, I wouldn’t replace it.

He needs to go for option 3, which is to carry on using the phone he’s got. Mine has a crack and I’ve used it like this for months!

Or he can do jobs for money and save up for either a new phone or a replacement screen.

I wouldn’t pay this, especially if money was tight!

YANBU. The obsession with upgrading phones as soon as a new model comes out is ridiculous. I'm a big fan of using a phone until it no longer works. If when android 10 comes out, it doesn't work, then get a new phone. But until then I'd try to fix it on the cheap.

Can't the screen be replaced? Given he's happy swap to a £70 phone, the phone he has can't be that expensive? However, I suppose if the cost of replacing the screen is more expensive than the £70, it makes sense once his is obsolete to buy new. But I'd still be using it with a crack in the screen as long as he can see what he's doing.

If you're in the red, buying a new phone which isn't necessary is stupid, and your son should have more respect for the position you're in.

You’d be mad to do either option if his cracked phone still works. New phones are ridiculously fragile, it’s a scandal. DH replaced his top of the range Samsung a couple of weeks ago and has already cracked the screen.

He must wait until his contract expires or he can afford to buy one himself.

Does he need a smartphone? You can get a normal phone (simfree) for £20 or less.

Does you teenager have any savings (Christmas or birthday money) - can he pay for the phone himself? Does he have a birthday coming up and you could tell relatives if they don't mind then he would like money towards a new phone.

I agree that you don't need to just replace a child's belongings whenever they get broken. A little wait might make them more careful - and a good solid case to protect it would be good.

We've had reasonable luck buying second hand phones (choosing carefully with sellers with good ratings - boxes/chargers etc not stolen). Might be worth a look.

Tell him to get a paper round or weekend job and pay for it himself.

He would not be speaking to me like that and I really dont see it as his decision its not his money. If it's working it's just cosmetic and he can still use it

They haven't got expensive phones, no. They are the basic moto ones. That for both of them are under £20 at Tesco. We have third we will have to take a similar contract out for next year to as they go to high school (school is in the next town so better they are contactable).

My phone is not an expensive one either. just basic - partly cos of money but mostly cos I actually don't care really about materialistic stuff, as long as it calls and whatsapps then I am happy! He says though that that means I don't understand where he is coming from?

Hence why I was checking if IABU. To me, a phone is what your parents give you until you start earning oyur own money to splash on whatever you fancy upgrading. Also, given that we have replaced once already, and now this one is cracked, the track record isn't good. Yet he says he is careful with his phones!

And the "you get a new phone every month" was quite hurtful, as it just isn't true and I rarely spend any money on me and it was a stretch to even get that one after Christmas and made me massively stressy and feel guilty! :(

He has to use the one he has until he can replace it or (maybe, depending on what you usually spend) have it as a birthday present

It does need to be a smartphone as their school has homework apps.

No savings. and birthday is not until late in the year.

He says though that that means I don't understand where he is coming from?

Maybe not. Oh well.

I wouldn’t put up with this level of unreasonable whinging!

If he wants a new phone (it’s want, not need) he needs to earn money!

We have one of those little high street shops where you can get screens fixed quite cheaply - maybe see how much it’d be? It’s hard I know - dd is always asking for an upgraded iPhone even though hers is better than mine! We can afford it but it’s not about the money even - it’s the materialistic “need” for shite like this when you know it’s just a marketing ploy. According to her ALL of her friends have the latest phones.
Ive told her she needs to save half the money herself before il even think about it.

Yes I agree, if I was wavering the whining would finalise the decision for me .

just wanted to add, the phone I replaced mine with was a £70 phone too! That was the one that died within a month! The contract one, tbf is slightly better as it is a new contract and they only do the better phones!

The headmaster at my school has an old Nokia!!!!

Which works fine

I had a huge crack on my screen which meant the phone could t be used

It was £200 to replace the screen alone!!!

He’s a child. He either saves up for it. Or continue to use it. The obsolete thing is bullshit.

He is making me feel so unreasonable :( so I am glad to see that there are some people out there that wouldn't replace it at all. Makes me feel less mean!

I did point out that through no fault of his own, his brother is now walking the 40 minutes to school as his bike broke and is unfixable - while he merrily rides ten minutes! - so if I had any spare cash then actually I would replace his brothers bike. Who again, it must be pointed out, has not complained once and is happy to wait for his birthday in a few months!

Blimey, in those circumstances OP, there's really no decision!

Purchase him a screen protector and cover so no further damage can be made.

If you can't afford it you can't afford it. This would be true even if his phone wasn't working. His options

1. pay for it with his savings
2. get a job to pay for it (yes I know, not necessarily easy at his age)
3. carry on with what he's got.

I've had a trying afternoon, so maybe this is harsh, but I'd be confiscating the phone he's got if he doesn't stop the attitude.

Thanks, everyone. He just has a way of making me feel unreasonable and I feel irrationally guilty. Plus I am glad I have a phone now after a week of no phone - but then, I work so why shouldn't I? Also, I am an adult? But then I always put the kids first but argh! I want to buy other DS a bike as I feel for him more than for a cracked phone and feel that he needs it more, so I just can't justify an upgrade to the phone, especially when he was happy for an insurance replacement in the first place.

Let’s say you did replace this perfectly serviceable phone.

Next week he will be saying you don’t understand where he’s coming from when he needs to replace his trainers with a new pair of Adidas.

And that’s teenagers for you. You stand firm not just because of your valid reasons but because it’s your job to help him become a reasonable, considered adult.

What model is the phone he's got? Most of the fairly recent Motorolas will be compatible with android 10. The phone doesn't suddenly stop working if it can't receive the android 10 update either.

Your phone is the priority as its not working at all. When he's working and making his own money, he can spend 70 quid on one himself.
Where he's coming from is completely irrelevant. As long as it performs the basic functions that he needs, there should be no further discussion on the matter. Hes the one who has cracked it, he needs to live with that and realise that things cost money to replace. When he's the one forking out the 70 quid then he can have the final say, in that regard, he doesn't understand where you are coming from.

So long as his phone still works, you do not need to do anything. If he wants the £70 phone he can save up from pocket money/birthday money etc.