To ask if you feel worn down with life?

[janemaster]

I do. It just feels like there have been too many things happen over the last 6-years. Many bereavements, one in traumatic circumstances, illness, urgent hospital admission for partner, redundancy, unemployment, job with a very bullying boss, lots of travelling every weekend to visit dying parent for months and months.
Things have now kind of settled down a bit. But I just feel totally worn down.
Anyone else feel worn down? Do you know what I mean?

Totally, every single day, I wake up and just eighth here we go again.

In the last 8 years I've had cancer 3 times, multiple surgeries and grotty treatments, lost everything we owned in a fire, got married and had a baby which my delightful ILs created merry havok over and still are, my dm has been diagnosed with a terminal illness and is on very limited time and needs daily care.

All the advice on self care etc is great but I barely have enough hours in the day as it is without taking what feels like totally selfish time for me.

@Straycatstrut please, please reach out for help, family, friends GP, Samaritans.Your children would be devastated without you. Things can get better. Me and DP lost a friend to suicide last year, we just wish they had let us in and reached out to us

I do. I’m utterly exhausted all the time. I look grey and worn out, I have no energy and my mood is so brittle that by 8pm I feel like screaming or crying.

I’m desperate for quiet and some time alone without constantly having something I have to DO.

I really don’t like life at the moment.

Yes. The last couple years have been awful. Have dealt with my father's terminal illness then eventual horrifying death. My business partner lost her child so have had to cope with the business entirely alone whilst also being in grief for her.
My house flooded- caused 40k worth of damage. Had to fight the insurance company to pay up. They did eventually- after an 8 month battle - had to go to the ombudsman. Just heard that my 6 year legal fight to get my father continuing healthcare funding failed (fight carried on even after he died). Then, my beloved dog died.

So yeah, its been shit actually. However- I will never ever give up. Luckily, I have the stubbornness of a terrier with a bone which spurs me on to carry on, no matter what. Things finally feel more on an even keel.
Things that have helped me are:

jogging- great way of releasing endorphins and getting rid of stress
meditation/prayer/law of attraction- helped enormously with positive thinking despite everything crashing down around me
My family- kids and H, always encourage me
Reading inspirational books about positive thinking

Hang in there! you arent alone and you can get through this. In the words of winston churchill: "when you are going through hell....keep going"

Yes.
I feel like I am standing in the middle of a motorway being repeatedly hit every time I get back up. But Snipers Alley is a good phrase too.

@Bigblue20 - Yes, I think this is the case too.

@OldQueen1969 - great post!

Me too OP. Sorry to hear about your and others struggles.

Same thing here, last eight years of multiple bereavements OH suicide attempt, second crisis, separated after two decades, ds with neurological condition...

There's currently a Life of Trauma thread on here with similar experiences. Its so sad to hear of others having such difficult times, but as others have said there is some comfort in knowing you're not entirely alone.

straycat please please reach out for help. my dsil lost her Dh By suicide 18 months ago and she is broken. It's so awful. All wider family have been devastated. His mental pain has been multiplied and shared among his family and friends.

I'm so sorry to hear your situation is so hard, and I do understand, I've had very dark thoughts over recent years, I really hope something changes for the better.

Yes.
A lot has happened in the last two years and dh and I just don't recognise ourselves any more.
We did manage to get out together for the first time in a year last week and that was really nice and connected us but then back to reality and we are back to our stressed out worn out selves.
I don't like it one bit.
But don't know when it will end

Yes I do.

Every difficult thing that happens makes you a bit less resilient. You keep going because you have to buy each time you get a little weaker, you never quite get back to where you were. You get your head above the wave & see another one coming.

I think a lot of people feel like that. I do. Life is so tiring & so sad much of the time.

Yes. It is one punch after another without end. I often wonder what is the point, and do I really want to continue, if this is what it will always be like? Worn to the bone.

that's the exhaustion talking, not you @CrazyToast

You are still in there somewhere, you wouldn't feel it otherwise

Laniakea spot on how I feel. I couldn't have put it as well.

Sorry there are so many people feeling so down.

Totally empathise with you. Don’t know how much more I can take tbh.

Oh OP, I’m with you. I need a break from life, I’m exhausted and not even quite 40 yet.

Yup.
I have had illness last year and spent a lot of time in hospital.
This year back at work and people creating shit for me despite knowing what I was off ill with. Life and people can just be dicks sometimes and sometimes it all happens all at once, too make it worse.

35 was probably the worst year of my life.
-baby born premature
-severe post natal depression
-money problems
-investigated by social services due to partners addiction problems, which were unknown to me until a social worker was at my door. HUGE shock!
-son needed emergency surgery
-my dad died after a very long, drawn out battle with cancer.
-moved house in the middle of all of this. Stressful as hell and only added to our money problems.

• toxic work environment
• teenage son with asd & learning disability going through an extremely difficult phase which led him to be suspended from his special school.

Just one punch in the gut after another. I feel like I'm constantly stressed, I cant remember the last time I laughed.

I try to focus on the positives but christ it's hard sometimes.

Please dont take this wrong but this thread has made me feel abit better. Knowing I'm not the only one who's going through hard times makes me feel less alone.

After coping with the death of my father in tragic circumstances and the aftermath of that, I also supported my teenage daughter through anxiety and an eating disorder, DH with several health issues not to mention my own. I lost myself for a while, but reading everyone else’s posts I think I’m out the other side now. I do have a bit of strength now and the energy is returning. Time does heal but be kind to yourself. Take offers of help from others - friends, family, professionals. If there are no others just take baby steps forward. Forums like this do help.

Yes I hear you op I have felt like this for the last few years we just go from one disaster to another be it financially things breaking down family health job loses etc Just wish we could have a break a bit of good luck for a change. I just feel weary fed up of the daily grind no matter how hard we work doing extra hours etc something always comes up or breaks so we never get to enjoy it

Jeez I'm.really over it today. Dog dog tired.

It comes in waves.
I find a couple of days in the house, getting on top of jobs, being able to have a bath at 10am, and just recharging helps.
I have some days booked off work over Easter and we aren’t going anywhere. Just chilling at home. I can’t wait.

Make sure you have time for yourself. Ask for help if you need it, and don’t forget, you aren’t alone in feeing like this.
Sending lots of love to you, from another tired mom on the internet xxx