To want to know what’s the meanest patient you’ve ever had? A question for nurses and anyone else working in the healthcare industry!

[Bellad19]

I’ve only worked in healthcare for 5 years, but NEVER in my five years have I had a patient be horrible to me until today. I am baffled as to how somebody could be so RUDE to someone who is trying to look after them!!
Please cheer me up and share your stories of awful patients with me so I know that I’m not alone 😭 I’m a sensitive person anyway but for some reason today really got to me and I’ve just cried ever since I got home! I’ll blame the pregnancy hormones!!

Exactly, some people just have no sense of what is acceptable and what is not

@PlomBear - I was wondering that too! And how do they acertain whether the baby is in distress without touching you to put a monitor on or listen to the heartbeat?

Well i can forgive patients who have been rude, abusive and inappropriate towards me as they are ill and vulnerable.

Can i forgive bullying colleagues who should be professional? Absolutely not...the " colleague" who tutted each time i made a mistake upset me far more than the huge man who tried for a grope.

I have had:
I have just met you for the first time and I don't like you .

When this person saw the shocked and upset look on my face , they said it was nothing personal.

I said it was , and I will book you in with someone else .

I also had , it's obvious you didn't qualify recently. I want to see someone who will know all the latest techniques.
This person was 95.

The people that said those things were not vulnerable or in any pain .

@ToffeePennie as a midwife I don’t think you have anything to apologise for! You didn’t do anything wrong. You don’t magically just give up bodily autonomy because you’re in labour! Ignore anyone telling you otherwise.

My worst experience was a new mum and her partner shouting at me for over an hour about their previous birth experience. Which I had absolutely zero to do with, as it was in a different hospital, in a different state in a country I wasn’t even IN at the time. There was a social worker in the room at the time and he just bloody left me to be abused by them on my own.

how do they acertain whether the baby is in distress without touching you to put a monitor on or listen to the heartbeat?

With consent. That’s how.

If you don't want intervention in labour, why go to hospital at all? Why not have a home birth? No offence meant by this question- just genuinely curious!

I’m curious too. Do you mean not touching AT ALL or only touching with consent. Of course the midwife should seek consent every time. Not being goady but does that include not having an emergency Caesarian?

I had one midwife say to me I wasn’t in established labour this was baby 3 not my first and I screamed at her I needed to push what did she fucking do left the room my husband had to catch our son whilst two other midwives flew into the room to help me.

She came back a few hours later and I told her to get out of my room as she nearly killed my child and she smirked at me. I reported her what was done fuck all as she was still practising as a midwife and I went onto have my daughter and she was on duty. I told the doctor there And then if she came near me I’d be up for murder. I ended up with a junior midwife that night that had only been at one live birth.
To say she was green well..... but she was lovely.

I was pressured into a hospital birth, due to our house not actually being built and my mum not wanting me to labour in her house. That’s why I had a hospital birth.
I specifically stated that I didn’t want anyone to touch me, unless they had asked and been granted consent. Which they hadn’t. I knew what was going on - I labour very quickly so at the point where the midwife attempted a VE without consent and saying I was pushing for no reason...

It's awful people working in the NHS get abuse. It's terrible and unfair and it's bad that nothing is done about it. I work in probation so I have similar and it's horrid.

From the other side of the curtain - I have found many pharmacists rude. That isn't because I'm rude myself - I understand how hard a job they have so am always polite and nice. I collect a script for suboxone for addiction, although I work and function on most senses. My pharmacists in Wales (tesco pharmacy) were lovely, kind and treated me with respect

The ones in boots are not. They have a massive hatch for a start which dehumanises you. There's one pharmacist who is kind and treats me with respect - the others never remember my name despite seeing me daily for months and 3x week for months. One doesn't even ask for my name just states at me rudely ignoring my hello until I say it. I work full time and the nice pharmacist has told me in the past that as I'm nice and I work, that if I pop down during lunch or at 5 they'll see me. I went there once and this new woman was on, who tried not giving me my script as I 3as too late. I explained assertively and she agreed, acting like it was a big favour. I even apologised for the inconvenience but explained I had picked up that time before - she all but called me a liar and said I couldn't have apparently, and told me to go elsewhere if the hours were not convenient. I've had it where they're in front of you filling in paperwork, you call hello to alert of your prrcence, and they ignore you completely. Im not expecting all bells to be dropped, but some acknowledgement and 'five minutes' is only polite. And actually, I work and have a life and haven't got 20mins to wait while they write notes slowly and discuss what they're having for tea tonight or doing the weekend. Again I wouldn't gdo it so why should they. It just screams 'my time is more important than yours' and again smacks of disrespect

The name thing annoys me so much. I work with 40plus service users who I see twice a week for 2hrs a time. I remember their names because it's rude and dehumanising when you don't. I'm polite and professional, I'm not aggressive. I treat them with respect so I damn well expect it back and it riles me when they can't be bothered. Forgetting a name daily after one year, or calling me 'surname' is lazy and unacceptable in my view.

I'm an adult with good self control. I'm a nice and polite person, and I have a job to lose and consequences if I act aggressivemy. So I don't kick off at their disrespect. But someone who has poor emotional control and nothing to lose - well I don't blame them for shouting at a pharmacist when they're treated poorly by that person. No it's not nice, bit neither is treating your patients like filth

Dullardmullard

If you mean is that because your other half had to catch the baby means the midwife nearly killed the dc - how would that have killed your dc? You sound ridiculously aggressive towards someone doing their job.

I once shouted at a paramedic to not fucking touch me, that was pretty horrible as the guy was trying to do his job. I'd fallen down steps though, and part of my wrist bone was out of my wrist, and I was genuinely terrified he'd touch it. He was lovely, and I think I did say sorry after. He even took my phone and called my mum for me, from the ambuance, as I couldn't use it.

I continue to be shocked at pps talking about abusing healthcare staff as if they are proud of it. It isn't ok, even if the member of staff has made an error.

Dullard I imagine what you are calling "smirking at you" was probably the midwife being uncomfortable and unsure because of your abuse. What did you imagine should be done, she should be sacked on the spot because she made an error? Healthcare staff are human, it happens.

stompy I wouldn't call consistently forgetting someone's name a mistake, I'd call it a lack of care. I wouldn't call continuing a conversation an error, I'd call it rude. I wouldn't call being rude to patients as an error, I call it rude. And even if it were an error - it's odd how they happen time and time again isn't it? It's almost as if the pharmacist doesn't realise the effect they have on others.

Or course people make mistakes, I do in my job. I call people by the wrong name (once) and I'll apologise. I'll be late to an appointment and I'll apologise. Reception will fail to tell me an appointment is here, and they'll be stuck waiting and even though it isn't my fault I apologise. Because I have respect for my service users (offenders) and I acknowledge that we all make mistakes. I also acknowledge that an apology goes a long way and I'm not to proud to pick up on my faults and try to change that.

Perhaps it's because I work client facing that the rudeness gets under my skin. If I manage to treat service users like humans and with basic respect then why can't I? If I was rude, abrupt or snappy I'd understand. But I'm not. I'm polite, I say good morning, I smile, say please and thank you, am organised around holiday scripts and know my doses. If I can show respect then I should recieve it I think. If I manage to do it in my job they so can they. Everyone has off days but off weeks are a sign of a bigger issue. And 3ven if someone is having an off day that shouldn't be taken out on service users. I'm not saying be emotionless robots of course not. But the place to discuss your personal concerns is with your manager or colleagues, and take time off if needed. It's not acceptable to be a mess in front of service users and either take it out on them or have them thinking you're weak. When it comes to service user, game face on. It's not easy but it's necessary. Trust me, I've done it.

I was a support worker and had a mental health patient (sectioned), strangle me, and and he was doing it was slowly lifting me off the floor up against the wall. I was 5 months pregnant. He should not have been in the area he was in, another staff member had used it to take him through as a short cut.

On the plus side I had a ‘good girl, well done’ pat on the back off management for my handling in de-escalating the situation.
The patient then came crying to me a few hours later, apologising for what he done, and how he could have seriously harmed me and my baby. But apparently all was right in the world as I had a pat on the back.

What gets me is that the times I have been in hospital so ill I have not been with it enough to thank those nurses and doctors and paramedics that have cared for me.So if you are in the South East I salute you.

I had a patient vomit on me on purpose. She dropped something on the floor next to her bed and asked me to pick it up, then when I bent down, she stuck her fingers down her throat and vomited all over me. She had hepatitis too (which I appreciate isn’t commonly transmitted via vomit but it didn’t improve my mood about the entire encounter). The reason she did this? Because I’d told her she couldn’t have an epidural as the anaesthetist was busy at a cardiac arrest, but he’d come as soon as he could...

So many narcissists justifying their rudeness to HCPs

Dh was practice manager in s surgery in the West country. We had just moved and he had just started in the job. He got a call from the receptionists saying a patient wanted a soon appointment with a doctor. Offered a morning appt - too early for her bus pass. Fair enough. Offered a late afternoon appt. No "thaaat be when the men be out". The call was passed to him as she was angry with the receptionists. Indeed appointments in the morning but no good. Again the "thaaaat be when the men be out. Oi dursent go out then. The meeen you know".

No he did not know. He had been reading dd Moonfleet and he had images or the patient bring afraid of smugglers and wreckers. Eventually it turned out that she was thinking the local factory would be disgorging employees when would make her trip to the surgery busy.

Surely, when collecting prescription items, especially controlled drugs, the HCP cannot assume to know who you are - you need to state your name? I've almost made the mistake of mixing up people's names that I thought I knew so it's always better to confirm who you are each time, even if it is daily.

Some people just love a moan

@Dullardmullard if someone 'screamed' at me, i'd refuse to treat them and pass their care to someone else too.

We're not obligated to treat you. We're not punch bags.