To fire my friend

[nadgug]

Just that really. She came in to help me one day and then assumed she had a job to fit around her childcare (2 half days a week).
Firstly, I didn't want anyone doing half days, it's too hard to fit around other staff and if the other person is sick I have no cover. I didn't offer her a job, she'd just assumed, and quite frankly, she's lazy. She spent a lot of time on her phone which left me to run the shop alone (it's not something anyone should run on their own).
I made a job list so she knew what she had to do. She still had to be asked and I ended up doing 90% of it.
She also brought her child in at half term which was fine if she was in the "designated area", obviously this didn't happen so I've now put a stop to that anyway, it's far too dangerous.
If it was anyone else I'd have let them go on the spot, I don't know how to do this without harming the friendship. I can blame the boss but I'd have to replace her so can't say it's due to cutting down hours etc. I'm really stuck. She's also been telling people she's running it with me! I know I should just tell her she's a CF and to piss off but she was quite a good mate.
(Namechanged as it's probably outing but been here a long time)

@TheNoiseHurts exactly! My mum gave me a job when I was 16. Everyone said it would be an easy ride because she was my mum!! No! I worked so hard and did more than my job required because it was my mum who would be answerable if her staff weren't performing.

@CalmdownJanet surely the fact that I'm firing her says I'm not allowing that. Or could you not connect the dots? She's been there 2 weeks (a total of 3 day). Not 2 years...

@dognamedspot you're exactly right. And the "hi Pamela" is ideal. Thank you

Given it's only been 3 days over two weeks I'd just call her bluff. Next time she comes in just ask her why she's there and if she says to work just say the bit a PP drafted about how it was only a one time thing and you'll let her know if you need her again.

So she helped you out one day and then just showed up? How did you set up for wage payment/see her proof of eligibility to work in the UK/agree hours etc? Surely she's still in a probationary period been if it's only been two weeks?

Hi Pamela, really sorry but my boss had a word with me this morning. He isn't happy I have hired a friend, and not happy I have let you work part time. He said the shop needs someone full time and we need to employ them in the 'legal' way of advertising the job. I'm so sorry!

In most companies you need to speak to the person and put them on an improvement plan,
If no improvement then you can dismiss. If you don’t want to say it coming from you just say the owner has asked you to speak to her about her phone use and fact she’s not pulling her weight and has 2wks to improve. Alternatively say the boss isn’t happy you didn’t advertise a role (the job she got) so you can’t just employ her like that and so you have to advertise. Then say someone else got it. She is a CF and is massively taking the P. You need to tell her straight though that she has to improve or she’s out

Would just like to add, I'm only in this shop 2 hours per day. I only worked a full day with her yesterday and the lady she was in with during the week said everything was fine. When I spoke to her yesterday she admitted it was much the same when they were in together. It's less than 24 hours since I've been aware of this. Regarding the childcare, like I said, I had no staff, it was a temporary measure so that the shop could open. It will not be happening again

Get the formal contracts drawn up ASAP, use this as an excuse to say you have been assessing and reorganising the job roles, this is then her opportunity to play by the same rules as everyone else, or leave,

Wage payment is cash in hand and employees are required to pay their own tax and national insurance. (I thought this was illegal but apparently it isn't! I've learned a lot of business law this week). I've seen her passport and NI number before so I know she can work here but you're right, it needs to be done the same as everyone else. She is in a probationary period and I can just tell her not to come back. I was trying to cause as little damage to the friendship as possible.

I can connect the dots just fine thanks. Look I'm really not being mean, but it is absurd that you have to fire someone you never hired and it's not good management, if phrasing it that way makes you feel better. But there is no point in pretending it's not shite you allowed this to happen, I mean how did she arrive into work and take off her coat without you saying "Eh sorry Pamela what are you doing here", I just can't imagine that happening, surely you were wtf but you just let her work?

@FixTheBone of course! Why didn't I think of that!

'Hi Pamela, really sorry but my boss had a word with me this morning. He isn't happy I have hired a friend, and not happy I have let you work part time. He said the shop needs someone full time and we need to employ them in the 'legal' way of advertising the job. I'm so sorry!'

Perfect. If she is angry about that then that's her problem.

@CalmdownJanet I'm not saying it was a good management choice but one bad move doesn't make me a shit manager. I'm learning on the job, I've not been a manager before so I'm finding my feet. Everything was up in the air and I did just let it happen and I shouldn't have. I take full responsibility but I'm asking advice on how to fix it, not to be reminded of my shortcomings of which I'm fully aware

What's all this shit manager crap? The OP is running a very small privately owned shop by the sounds of it, she's not head of department within a large organisation. She's been side swiped by a CFer of a friend, it happens. Sort it out as diplomatically as you can OP but ultimately if she chooses to take offence then you are better of with a bit of cooling in the friendship. CFers are very much of the take a mile when given an inch brigade.

Thank you @TooTrueToBeGood that's exactly what it is. A little shop with 5 staff, a couple of those only do every other Saturday. It's owned by my boss. If she takes offence it's going to have to be her problem, I can't risk my job for that

This place doesn’t sound like they follow employment law at all. How can there only be verbal contracts? And employees are really in charge of paying their own tax and ni?
I also don’t understand how you can manage a shop when you’re only there 2 hours a day?
Tbh sounds like a complete shambles but I don’t think it’s your fault. Has the owner helped in any way?

@nadgug

This happens so easily I ran a charity and I found it so hard dealing with people. People take the piss, I had people I trusted steal. It was really hard introduction to managing humans.

I took on my cousin who needed a job, I had to leave him in charge and he did nothing. Nothing at all. It went on for 3 months and in the end I spoke to my mum who wasn't helpful at all, she went down when he was there, I told her I'd left him a list to do and end of day I asked her if he'd done it, she didn't really answer, so I was on my own, the bad one who took his job away but I rang and told him I didn't need him anymore that we didn't have the money and I had volunteers that we're offering to do it for me. He was fine and left, family were upset but they got over it.

I actually think it would be easier to be in a corporation. At least I'd have actually framework and regulation to go by. We have nothing in place

This is about business, not friendship. I'm sorry but if you are managing a business you are going to have to woman up and take control. Tell her that her "work" and attendance isn't acceptable and she is going to have to leave. I'm sorry but thats the harsh reality of running a business. If you cant do that then I dont know how your business is going to survive?

@ButterflyBitch verbal contracts are legal but not advisable so that's changing. Cash in hand is fine as long as employees are aware of paying their own NI and tax. It is a bit of a shambles but I'm trying to fix it

@Jojowash it's hard isn't it. It's definitely taught me a lesson if nothing else.

@MimiLaRue I know you're right. Usually I'm straight down the line. I don't know why I'm being such a wimp. I do need to woman up and get it done

Wage payment is cash in hand and employees are required to pay their own tax and national insurance. (I thought this was illegal but apparently it isn't! I've learned a lot of business law this week). I've seen her passport and NI number before so I know she can work here but you're right, it needs to be done the same as everyone else. She is in a probationary period and I can just tell her not to come back. I was trying to cause as little damage to the friendship as possible.

So the store has no actual contracts, isn't following the guidelines for proving eligibility to work in the UK, probably isn't training staff (has anyone been given H&S training, depending on the shop ARS training, risk assessments, cash handling, till training etc.) and I'm not sure that cash in hand IS legal for employees. Are they classed as self employed/contractors/freelancers or what? Do they get written payslips?

She has no rights as she’s not been there for two years and is on her probation period. I would just say “sorry but you don’t fit our needs, we need full time staff or staff that can work a full day.” She doesn’t sound like a great mate anyway, letting you do 90 percent of the work.