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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Covid-19 genuine dilemma.

75 replies

onalongsabbatical · 22/02/2020 19:38

Dilemma – I have a friend who’s returning from a month abroad in a week’s time, including Thailand and other eastern countries, hopping from one to another, so more than just the plane out and back, a few plane rides. She went just as the whole Covid-19 thing was beginning to kick off. Thought I was being hysterical (I suspect) when I warned her to be careful. I also suspect she’s not taking much notice of it while she’s away, having too much of a good time.
Here’s the thing; a week after she gets back she’s having a BIG birthday party. Lots of hugging and kisses type thing. I’ve said nothing but I think she should postpone to be on the safe side, and if she doesn’t, I’d rather give it a miss. She’ll be miffed – not angry but miffed for sure – and probably do a fair bit of eye-rolling. My DH, also invited, also doesn’t want to go now – and he’s the driver – it’s out in the sticks, no public transport. He's a scientist and not REMOTELY prone to hysteria!
I really don’t want to put a dampener on her hol by telling her all this now, but on the other hand I think she needs to at least think about postponing until she’s two weeks clear of travelling.
I don’t think I’m hysterical at all, just being cautious.
What do people think? WWYD, just not go? Go and stop being silly? Advise postponing? Thanks - all opinions welcome!

OP posts:
NomDeDieu · 22/02/2020 20:46

Also see the ratio between the number of deaths and people recovering... nowhere near as dangerous as we originally were lead to believe...

hoolydooly · 22/02/2020 20:47

Why would you worry if she has no symptoms?
Yes, asymptomatic transmission is possible, it seems, but even so, the chances that she came into contact with it are tiny.
I just came back from Japan and was a little concerned as cases are on the rise there but it's still only 122 cases in a population of 127 million. Seems more likely you would catch it in Brighton with its population of 229,000 and 5 cases. Presumably her situation is much the same unless she has been in China.

mumwon · 22/02/2020 20:49

I think you might be going down with a bug at that time -

Huffs123 · 22/02/2020 20:53

FWIW I don't think you are over-reacting OP.

lljkk · 22/02/2020 20:55

yabu.
She isn't going to agree with you.
Govt advice is that she doesn't have to agree.
If you don't feel safe -- don't go.

TimeForPlentyIn2020 · 22/02/2020 20:56

You keep saying she’s been to Thailand like that’s a known hotspot. Is it, have I missed something?

Wouldn’t occur to me not to go to the party.

Huffs123 · 22/02/2020 20:56

It's a seriously scary virus, people are being too dismissive of it imo. If anyone needs reasoned, level-headed and expert analysis of the virus then take a look at the videos by Dr John Campbell on YouTube.

Instatwat · 22/02/2020 21:00

Nope, I wouldn’t be concerned enough to skip the party. If you’re travelling there by car it would be a greater risk than that of catching the virus.

RhodaCamel · 22/02/2020 21:02

What Dr John Campbell on YouTube then make up your mind.

RhodaCamel · 22/02/2020 21:02

watch!

RhodaCamel · 22/02/2020 21:04

I agree with you Huffs123 a lot of experts are getting worried, that worries me.

priscillanotofthedesert · 22/02/2020 21:04

I honestly feel like some people on these coronavirus threads (not you OP) would be positively delighted if we all started dropping like flies from this virus.

Dailyjunglegrind · 22/02/2020 21:05

You friend sounds naive to the potential risk she is presenting to her nearest and dearest. Self imposed quarantine would give everyone a sense of respect and relief to the situation. The party would be enjoyed by more addressing the risks.

onalongsabbatical · 22/02/2020 21:06

Thanks Huffs123 and RhodaCamel I'll do that - not right now, got go out for a bit, but I defo will.

OP posts:
Aragog · 22/02/2020 21:10

Self imposed quarantine would give everyone a sense of respect and relief to the situation.

I can't imagine many employers being too happy if their employees self quarantine themselves after a holiday for another two weeks!

Last year we went to Singapore for a week and later in the year Japan for a fortnight. I can just imagine calling my headteacher to tell her, and the parents finding out, that Mrs Aragog won't be teaching your children for the next fortnight as she's been on holiday and, although it's not advised by any government official and she has no symptoms whatsoever barring some Jetlag, she's decided to stay home 'just in case.'

I'm afraid self imposed quarantine just isn't possible!

Aridane · 22/02/2020 21:17

YABU .

Don’t go if you don’t want to but don’t or that person telling her to rearrange.

And why do you think you know better than the UK gov advice?

I

Booboostwo · 22/02/2020 21:20

If it is as contagious as the worse case scenaria are suggesting almost everyone will get it sooner or later, in which case the logical thing is to try to get it sooner when hospitals are still able to cope with the severe cases rather than later when they will be inundated. Ergo, go to the party and make sure you snog your friend.

shudup · 22/02/2020 21:20

I wouldn't want it because for me it could be a death situation (I had SARS and almost died). What she does is up to her. I'm guessing she's young and unaffected by such dilemmas? If she's doing SE Asia, she's probably not even seeing any news.

lljkk · 22/02/2020 21:27

I wonder if the 2 SARS are closely enough related that there could be cross immunity & shudup could actually be immune to SARS2. That will come out in the science soon, I suppose!

Whiskeychaser · 22/02/2020 21:35

My sister and her partner got back from Singapore last night. They were only there for a day or 2 on a stopover from New Zeakand/Australia though.

We saw them for dinner today, and although we made jokes about them sitting the other side of glass doors, and quarantining themselves for 2 weeks, etc, we're not really concerned about it, and that's despite her having a cough for the last few days of their trip.
The airline also wasn't obviously bothered as they were free to go.

SirVixofVixHall · 22/02/2020 21:36

Shudup you had SARS ? Good grief. That must have been terrifying. So glad you recovered.
I am torn between Booboostwo s logic of getting it early, or hoping for a vaccine. I am finding the rumours of people getting reinfected and then dying of heart failure extremely frightening as that suggests no immunity even after infection and recovery.

RocketFire · 22/02/2020 21:37

my colleague has just returned from thailand and hong kong....hes back at work and i'm worried. i work closely with him

he's got no symptoms so came in!

Whiskeychaser · 22/02/2020 21:38

I also have a compromised immune system, so would be more likely to get it, but if I'm honest, I think it's being blown out of proportion.

EC22 · 22/02/2020 21:40

OTT

DwayneBenzie · 22/02/2020 21:46

If it is asymptomatic then it will be in every country and every major city by now.