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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU nursery want to be paid when my child wasn't there

112 replies

angie1984 · 20/02/2020 17:21

So i have a DD who is two and started nursery in October last year, when my husband started working, they were very good allowing us to switch days as we needed as they weren't full at the time, I was about 5/6 months pregnant at the time and stated at the initial meeting it was only going to be until I went on maternity leave, in January.
So January rolls around and its the last couple of weeks before I go on maternity leave on 24 th so we tell them and our daughter that she won't be coming much longer, when it gets to the last week we state that it is the last week and then when we get to the last day, we state we won't need them anymore, until I finish maternity. During this period but i'm unsure when, they ask if we would like to keep our DD on their books for when i return to work, which I say yes but that she will not be in for the next 6 months while i'm off.
Got an email early Feburary about an invoice for the whole of the month of Feburary which having just given birth i assumed was an error on their part. Today i've had another email stating I need to pay ASAP, called the nursery who say i didn't give four weeks notice, which i probably didn't officially. They are charging me for the four weeks.
AIBU to think this is very CF while I admit I do not think i gave them four weeks notice, we spoke with them about it at many pick ups. And when I received my invoice at the end of January I double checked that this included all the days she was doing in January, when I spoke to them on the phone I point out that we had spoke to them about it at least 2 weeks prior to her leaving, they stated they would get back to us. Should I pay for two weeks or nothing at all. No one once mentioned this four week notice period and when i booked her in for her last few weeks and then stated she would not be coming after the 24 th or in the weeks that followed.

OP posts:
Purpleartichoke · 20/02/2020 17:46

“Keeping her on the books” often means keeping your slot. Which means you are still paying for child care for the entirety of your leave even if you do not bring your child.

BrendasUmbrella · 20/02/2020 17:47

You should give notice in writing. You may have told someone who had no authority at the nursery and didn't pass the information on. But appeal it anyway. Tell them you gave them verbal notice. But check your contract first to make sure it doesn't stipulate written notice only...

saraclara · 20/02/2020 17:48

Verbally mentioning it to the staff who look after your child isn't 'notice'. Notice is in writing to the manager/admin staff.

Lazypuppy · 20/02/2020 17:49

I think you confused it by saying you wanted to keep her on the books...at my nursery that means you pay for the space as they are keeping it for your dd.

Namelessinseattle · 20/02/2020 17:49

I would take it that keeping her on the books means you're still paying for her place and that they thought you were just telling them she wouldn't be in for the next 6 months because you were off. As opposed to handing in your notice.

Looneytune253 · 20/02/2020 17:49

It will most likely be in your contract that you need to give written notice. Also when you say you told them regularly on pick up, was this the management staff/ admin or was it normal staff in the rooms? Only because the staff in the rooms won't have anything to do with notice/fees/invoices etc so it's not enough to chat to staff in rooms. Either way it looks like you still need to pay it sorry

MimiLaRue · 20/02/2020 17:50

You are in the wrong here I'm afraid- you have to give notice in writing. They cant keep a space for you for free because they could use that space for a paying child so its not unreasonable on their part.

TrixieTheWhore · 20/02/2020 17:51

What does your contract say?

Bagofoldbones · 20/02/2020 17:53

Yeah I’ve just paid a month after pulling my dd out and she’s not been there at all.

But I didn’t give them a months notice - they will still need to pay people who were rostered in plus another child could have taken that space.

Also finding some where that is flexible and you know your kids are safe is priceless. Don’t burn your bridges with them and just pay it. You should have put your notice in formally

Kateplaysrugbyinmydreams · 20/02/2020 17:54

You've swapped her days to suit you, you've failed to give written notice, you want to keep her place without paying for it. I think you're the CF here.

londonrach · 20/02/2020 17:55

Its four weeks written notice at all the nurseries i know. What your contract say. If went to court you have to pay want contract says!

londonrach · 20/02/2020 17:56

And costs. Tbh reading your post you owe them four weeks as not given correct notice

londonrach · 20/02/2020 17:57

You cf not nursery im afraid

AriadnesFilament · 20/02/2020 17:57

Based on the details in the OP I’d be expecting an invoice every month tbh - ‘on the books’ says ‘holding her place so no other child can take it’ to me, which they will want paying for usually. Plus, notice with nurseries is usually a month, in writing to the office, verbally on the door doesn’t count.

I think you need to ring them, or go in to talk to the manager, about what they think has happened so far and what is happening going forward vs what you think, because I don’t think you’re on the same page as them at all. You need to get in the habit of checking contracts and Ts and Cs pronto.

bloodywhitecat · 20/02/2020 17:58

If they are holding her place open I would expect to pay for it as it is a place they can't use for another child.

RainbowAlicorn · 20/02/2020 17:59

Hold if I read your OP right then you said you want her to go back in 6 months time, so you have told them to save a place for her, that is what you are paying for. They can't just keep a place open for her they are a business not a charity. I don't really understand why you have taken her out whilst you are maternity leave, surely at this time she would need a constant routine, what with the disruption of a new baby.

LaPampa · 20/02/2020 18:01

The people who you deal with day to day at a nursery invariably are not the finance / manager etc so I would always deal with the money stuff by email in addition to telling the day-to-day staff.

LaPampa · 20/02/2020 18:02

FWIW, I didn’t take mine out during mat leave so as not to disturb routines and give me some space with the new baby.

Also reading back your post again, I’d be expecting an invoice every month for holding the space.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 20/02/2020 18:03

If my daughter has a drs appointment for example and will arrive early or late/ will or won’t need lunch etc I inform the childcarers on the floor but always email too. Everything needs to be in writing, there are so many kids it’s unreasonable to expect staff to remember everything every parent mentions.

Emmelina · 20/02/2020 18:04

If you haven’t formally given notice in writing, they are assuming they will have your DD on her usual days and need to be adequately staffed for the number of children expected, including your daughter in that number. Staff need paying, and the money comes in part from fees. It wouldn’t be fair to the nursery nurse on barely more than minimum wage to be sent home because they’re under numbers. They’ll probably go off and do some planning or something in a quiet corner, but still need to be paid!

MyDaughtersLeftFoot · 20/02/2020 18:07

I have to give a months notice in writing. Verbal wouldn’t be enough and I’d have to pay. I see where you’re coming from but the terms will be in your contract and you need to follow them. I rarely see the nursery manager who would be the person needing notice. Telling the room staff wouldn’t be enough IMO

CinderellasSecrets · 20/02/2020 18:10

If they are keeping her on the books then it means that they can't take on another child to fill her place, so if your not paying for her and they can't take on another child then they are making a loss. I know you say that they have other places but that's not really the point, as unfair as it is if you want her on the books you do need to pay for that place.

switswoo81 · 20/02/2020 18:11

I'm a teacher so my children don't attend crèche all summer. My preschool aged childs place is held but I must pay one day a week to hold the babies place. I think yanbu the communication between ye seemed very poor and ad hoc.

EstebanTheMagnificent · 20/02/2020 18:11

The key thing here is ‘keeping her on the books’. You should expect to pay some kind of retainer to keep her place open although I would argue that if she is not there to eat, use resources etc then it should not be the usual full daily rate.

ArriettyJones · 20/02/2020 18:12

As everyone has said, notice should be given in writing. (It is also a good idea to have a paper trail of discussions about “keeping her on the books”, return dates and suchlike, so do all those things by email.)

I would just take it on the chin and pay without making any fuss. Firstly, because you are the one in the wrong here, and, secondly, your DD is only 2, has been FT in nursery for three months, now will be at home with mum and a new baby for an indeterminate number of months before going back to nursery. That’s a lot of change for her. Don’t create more by burning your bridges and having to look for a second, unfamiliar, nursery.

Had you considered keeping her place on very PT while you are on ML? For the continuity for her and some respite for tou?

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