Parents meeting praising

[Lazi]

Hi
Any teachers here? Is it a common practise that teachers talk only great things about our kids during parent's meetings. My two boys have been praised by teachers everytime to sn extend that even I felt like am i raising some sort of Einstein material😀I know they are very bright boys. But I wonder do they let us know if they are lagging in some subjects or doing some mistakes?

It sounds like they're doing great. I assume they're still young, primary age?

Depends on the teacher. I do find some are very positive and will only talk about the negative if there's something specific that's a real problem.

And the winner of this week's most stealthy and boasty stealth boast is........

Primary school? That's 100% my experience too. Y6 & 4 now, and I've never had a single teacher say a single thing negative about either girl, nor any thing whatsoever that they could improve upon. Nice I guess, but pointless.
It's one of those things you can't really discuss with friends in real life too!

But I wonder do they let us know if they are lagging in some subjects or doing some mistakes? No they lie through their teeth to parent's setting the lagging DC's up to fail. In the real world I'm am sure most teacher's focus on the better part of a child while acknowledging their failure and area where they need more help.

Well, this does sound like stealth boasting. But I would also say it's not great from school. Dd is exceeding expectations across the board, teacher gushes about how lovely she is then tells me what dd is working on and needs to work on. Not in a "she's behind and bad" way but in a "she's achieved these things and the next thing to work on is this thing."

No.
Sensible teachers will praise everything that deserves to be praised but also let parents know 'next steps'. There is always something every one of us can work on.

Our teachers show us results from termly tests (scores, not the whole test) and compare those to start of academic year/projected progress, and raise any concerns. We get an idea of where DC will be at the end of the academic year, and whether they need support with anything.
So far, so good, but I am glad that it's not just platitudes - we see the charted progress.

My bright kid is not as good at spelling as she is at other things and this did get glossed over for a few years. No one felt the need to tell us this, and now we know I’m not too sure what to do with that - she’s OK at spelling. If you’re bored with the reports of overall success, try listening round the edges of what you’re hearing and asking how you can help at home.

3DC here. Enjoy it. DD1 got relentless praise until Y6 I think when there finally was some 'she needs to work on X'. She's pretty bright but not out of this world intelligent. The other two get positive praise but less comments like 'she's a complete sponge', 'she is so bright and hard working and focussed she will achieve anything she put her mind to'. More 'I'm very happy with her attitude and her progress'. So positive but less effusive. TBH I sometimes think it's as much about personality as anything else, DD2 seems better at maths (she has a 'feel' for numbers that DD1 doesn't have - we're a very numerate family and recognise that in DD2) but DD1 has an attractive open confidence and whereas DD2 doubts herself more.

Not even a humble brag.

Thank you all for the replies. Take it in a funny way about Einstein joke. But trust me what I said is 100 % true. One of my boy in year 1 and other one in year 3. It's not about bragging. I just want to realise my kid's weak points. As I said I know they are bright and very well behaved kids.my elder one is playing for England chess team as well. But as a mom, I always ask teacher what can I do to help them. But teachers are like you dont have to do anything specific. Everyone will have some mistakes.nobody is perfect.Ofcourse I know.. I just want to help my kids.

DD is Y6 currently. After the first parents meeting with her new teacher, DD overheard me telling DH what had been said. “Did she say anything good about me?” was DDs question.

So, no, my experience is the direct opposite to yours.

DD is bright, engaged, top sets for everything, no SN. Just the teacher /school approach is to focus on the negative - or so it seems to me.

DS Awais the same at primary - always negative. Teachers love him at secondary - but very balanced in terms of what he does well and what he needs to improve on.

Yea i dont think your bragging at all. Its a good question. I had the same, made parents evenings pointless. No information on how to improve the weaknesses. Then when Yr6 started and SATs was on the horizon they enrolled all the lacking kids on to 7:45am breakfast and revision ffs. They had years of parents evenings and class time to work on weak areas and never did

Ds is in y4 and they have regular assessments so usually tell us he's polite and well-mannered, not naughty but can be a little silly with the other boys. He's well liked by children and adults alike and is likewise 'bright'. We know he's exceeding in maths, expected for reading but below expected for written English so a real mixed bag. The teachers have always focused on the positives while highlighting areas for improvement and how we can support at home.

It's not great by the teacher imo, there must be things they can improve on. My ds is only in year1 but already exceeding in every end of year target, but his teacher always has something he can work on. Last time it was taking his time to make sure he reads and fully understands a task before rushing ahead. And the time before it was his handwriting.

Sometimes teachers can be wary of parents reactions face to face, so keep parents eve light and focussed on praise, and then put in writing any targets.

Your sons must have targets to work on every term/half term? That is where you get the information about where they need to work/where they’re making mistakes.

They're only Y1 and y3! They've barely started! Lots of primary teachers are gushing at this point, there's also still lots more variation when they're that little. Some kids are ridiculously ahead in y1-3 and it often completely evens out in the later years as others mature. That's why there often isn't much to be said at parent's evenings with that age group.

Don't be afraid to ask about "what more can we do?" or "what does my child need to work on?"
If the teacher has just been trying to persuade one set of parents to read with their child at home, and another that their child's behaviour needs to improve, then it's perhaps inevitable that they focus on the positives with those that are doing well.

22:57unchienandalusia
I asked the question here to get a clear cut view. What am i getting by boasting in an unknown platform!!!infact I cant ask this question to real life friends just because of the same thing you raised here🙄

So you acknowledge you can't boast to friends and choose to do so to strangers instead. Ok then.

@opticaldelusion
There is no point in talking with negative people. I clearly said what my intentions were.What a strange world!thank you all lovely moms who shared their genuine thoughts..

Ooh no, I've been to some complete shockers in secondary school....

We had this in Y1. Job share, both teachers there, both gushing with praise.

I asked what my DC finds difficult, and when they both said 'nothing' I asked what they are going to do about it, as it's not good for a child not to be challenged at all. I didn't get much of an answer. Fortunately, in other years the teachers have had something useful to say, so I dismissed Y1 as a weak year.

Quite normal for Y1 and Y3 I’d say. My eldest is Y4 and only just received less than glowing praise this time. He needs to apply himself more English and work on his spellings but working above average in maths and science. I’m glad they’ve said as now we can work on writing and spelling at home.