For expecting husband to get up with baby

[Pondlife87]

My husband is a teacher and on half term. When he's off we take it in turns getting up early when our baby wakes and thr other one lies in.
This morning is his lie in. I however was up half the night throwing up and on the toilet as i have a stomach bug.
Baby woke up this morning and it was very much expected i should get up with her. I've been sick and had diarrhoea again since getting up.
AIBU to think this is unfair and he should get up with her and help me out if I am ill. I have and would do that for him. There would be no question in my mind.

I agree with @TellMeWhoTheVilliansAre.

I also would add that my DH used to be very rigid about who’s turn it was to do things, but it was actually because he was so paranoid about doing his share he needed to keep track if it for his own peace of mind. However, it came across more of “its your turn”.

My DH also takes ages to rouse in the morning and needs a sec to pull himself together. He might not think in his half conscious stupor, so I’d always just give a nudge and say “oi I’m ill”.

I do agree with the majority here. You are an adult with a tongue in your head. You are responsible for a baby and you need to speak up for the both of you. Not saying anything, passive aggressively not talking to your DH for not reading your mind when he was tired too and sulking/martyr-ing yourself is childish and YABU. That might not be the nicest way to say it, but it’s to the point and my thoughts on it. Sorry.

@Pondlife87 I too prioritised my husbands comfort over mine and at weekends when he was off would get up early with the baby thenAfter her second nap continued the care thinking that it was giving him much earned rest and I would call for help when I really needed it or he would recognise it and offer. Never happened and he still prioritises his comfort over everyone else’s. Call him out on it early. Rod. Back!

Thank you to those who gave me constructive criticism. I realise that simply ignoring him isn't pragmatic (please note i was not awful to him. I simply didn't reply to one statement he made), but I blame the fact i was feeling very sorry for myself and very ill. The mix of being fatigued and ill does not always a logical mind make.
I spoke to my husband and he apologised, but it was very apparent it was a choice he made. Probably for the same reason. Being tired and illogical. But he certainly was aware that he was prioritising himself over me in the moment selfishly. He's spent all day making it up to me. So talking was for the best, but I'm glad I didn't allow myself to make excuses for his behaviour because 'he's a man'. He's literally only brought baby to me for feeds (she is EBF).
Just to clarify to those who called me romantic, a pushover etc based on minimal information and one situation and on one particular day. I am not a pushover. I am not a door mat. We generally have a fair relationship and I don't think jumping to conclusions about my personality and mentality and making judgements on my relationship as a whole based on a teeny bit of information is helpful. I don't like to ask for help but i don't normally have to. He baths her every night, does her evening meal. We have alternative days at the weekend to get up with her. We take it in turns to cook. This is all because i refuse to be his slave. I know he would happily fall into that role if i let him, but I've spent years working on our relationship being fair. I think this is why I was so annoyed as i know the one thing he is selfish with is sleep, but I was shocked he would still be this way when I was up all night being sick and he was 100% aware.

You need to put yourself first more OP, he definitely should not have needed to be told.

Good to hear OP.
Hope you are feeling better.

Good to hear OP.
It's nice to hear people who acknowledge that sometimes perfectly reasonable and nice people can be grumpy and unreasonable to their partners at times when tired without their partners being some sort of evil arsehole.

I'm glad you're sorted.

My experience with men is that if you’re waiting for them to be sensitive and notice you need help you’ll be waiting a long time. It will lead over time to more and resentment that they aren’t noticing you need help. I know from experience. You do need to just let him know, please can you get up as I’ve been vomiting half the night. Yes you’d do the same automatically - he (and many men) won’t. They need telling directly