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AIBU?

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Original poster

To Buy Cropped T-Shirts for 8 year old

39 replies

chellochello · 17/02/2020 12:57

My 8 year old DD has been nagging me to buy her some cropped t-shirts - the sporty sort she'd wear with leggings. Her Dad is dead set against it as he says the are too revealing for her age and she shouldn't be wearing them until she's older

I kind of see where he's coming from and have told her no a couple of times but now she is starting a dance club at school and says that everyone else will be wearing them.

Would it be unreasonable to buy her one?

OP posts:
StepHeelClack · 17/02/2020 12:58

For dance classes? I would offer cropped T-shirt’s with longer vest tops underneath

StepHeelClack · 17/02/2020 12:59

Also your 8 yr old thinks everyone will be wearing them - the class hasn’t started yet so she doesn’t know!

NotYourHun · 17/02/2020 13:00

I remember being obsessed with crop tops at that age. It’s only clothes. Unless they’ve got lewd/suggestive slogans written across them (remember that trend for velour tracksuit bottoms with ‘babe’ etc written across the arse? 🤢), the person looking at a child and thinking ‘that’s too sexy’ is usually at fault!!

Pantheon · 17/02/2020 13:00

Personally, I wouldn't buy them for my daughter at that age. I was actually allowed to wear that kind of thing when really young and I feel weird about it now tbh! It depends where, I suppose. If it's only at dance class, that's different to out and about.

TrippingOnSunshine · 17/02/2020 13:02

We all wore them as kids in the 80s! It was acceptable at the time...

Basilandparsleyandmint · 17/02/2020 13:02

My Dd has been a gymnast for years and she wears crop sets for training. I don’t personally see the issue with it for sport as it’s all very professional.
Will she be wearing the crop top and leggings just for dance ?

RhiWrites · 17/02/2020 13:04

They are common in dance. They don’t reveal any sexual characteristics, nothing that you couldn’t see in a bikini. Get her at least one to experiment with.

fairislecable · 17/02/2020 13:05

My DGD attends gymnastics and begged and pleaded for crop tops. DIL was not happy but found some substantial ones (longish with wide shoulder straps very sporty).

She looks lovely in them and they are worn for gymnastics only.

There is a compromise.

Trahira · 17/02/2020 13:05

I don't see a problem with this personally. After all she doesn't have anything to reveal, so I think that 'too revealing' is a silly comment.

However, he's her dad and gets an equal day in parenting decisions. So YANBU to discuss it with him again but YABU to buy them behind his back if you know he wouldn't like it.

haba · 17/02/2020 13:07

If he won't let her wear them now when she has a little girl's physique and nothing to show... he certainly isn't going to let her wear them when she's older and has a figure!
Is that ok?

littlepeas · 17/02/2020 13:09

Do we mean the sports bra style of cropped top here, or just t shirts that show her middle for no practical reason? The former is ok in a sports setting, as it’s for ease of movement, I wouldn’t buy the latter.

JosefKeller · 17/02/2020 13:11

If he won't let her wear them now when she has a little girl's physique and nothing to show... he certainly isn't going to let her wear them when she's older and has a figure!

but isn't that the point? You can't allow your child to do or wear something at 8, and forbid the same thing as 14.. That's why make-up is completely inappropriate on a young child.

JosefKeller · 17/02/2020 13:12

I am not a fan, but they are all wearing these cropped tops. As long as the kid is slim enough, I would go with the flow. Dance club is the most reasonable settings to wear them anyway.

TheDarkPassenger · 17/02/2020 13:13

I would let her at home but not out.

Mostly because I think they look rank 🤐

Nogoodusername · 17/02/2020 13:14

I think I’d be ok with a cropped sports top while she is doing the actual sport/ dance, but not outside of that. My 10 year old has a few cropped hoodies (H&M). She doesn’t actually like the cropped style but liked the colour/logo, but she wears them over T-shirts so no tummy on show. It’s February - there’s no reason for someone to have tummy on display outside a sports class lol

CoffeeCoinneseur · 17/02/2020 13:14

It’s a bit chilly for cropped t-shirts now, even if she was 15 years old.

But no I wouldn’t be buying an 8 year old cropped T-shirt’s.

FizzyIce · 17/02/2020 13:19

I don’t like them.
Still won’t buy a two piece for swimming for my 8 year old either even though whenever I see friends holiday photos ,their girls all wear them .
Nah

Bringmewineandcake · 17/02/2020 13:46

DD1 had a cropped tshirt for a dance show when she was 5 so I bought her a crop top to go underneath. Although she's younger than I was before I was wearing crop tops, I'd have no problem with her wearing a cropped tshirt now she's 7 so long as she has a crop top on underneath.

Original poster
chellochello · 17/02/2020 14:12

I have found some in H&M which have built in vest underneath - I think I will get her a couple of those to see if it keep her from nagging me haha

OP posts:
namechangetheworld · 17/02/2020 14:23

For dance club I'd be absolutely fine with it. For every day wear - I wouldn't like (or allow) it personally.

ElderAve · 17/02/2020 14:26

I agree with your DH but even if you don't you can't just buy them when he's asked you not to. You need to discuss and agree the way forward.

Backtoreality1 · 17/02/2020 14:30

@josefKeller ' as long as the kid is slim enough' - what the h£ll does her weight/size have to do with it. So long as the top fits, it fits! At 8 years age she shouldn't have to be making fashion decisions based on size!

MitziK · 17/02/2020 14:36

In a dance class is exactly what they were designed for.

Just because 'the dancer look' has been fetishized by some men, that doesn't mean that it's inappropriate to wear dance clothes whilst dancing, anymore than it's inappropriate to wear school uniform at school.

Forrandomposts · 17/02/2020 14:42

For sport - fine

For fashion - no.

No 8 year old girl (or any girl/woman for that matter) needs to be taught or have reinforced the lesson that to look good you should show skin.

JosefKeller · 17/02/2020 14:48

what the h£ll does her weight/size have to do with it. So long as the top fits, it fits! At 8 years age she shouldn't have to be making fashion decisions based on size!

why would you put your child in ill-fitted clothes? You dress for the body you have. An 8 year old shouldn't be overweight in the first place, but sadly some are.
A cropped t-shirt doesn't fit anyone who isn't slim, that's the point.

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