To be annoyed with DH re lads holidays, illness and moodiness

[BringOnTheBotox]

I'm so pissed off with DH.

He went on a stag do abroad for a week, came home for a few days then went off on a week long lads activity holiday. I didn't want him to go on both and thought that was taking the piss...

He then came home a week ago from the second holiday ill, which I know can't be helped. I managed to make him go to the doctor on Wednesday and he has tonsillitis. Again, not his fault but he's been absolutely vile mood wise since he got home. He hasn't done a thing in the house or with the DC. He refuses to take any paracetamol or ibuprofen; he takes his antibiotics but won't take anything else to make him feel better. He's been so grumpy, huffing and puffing, wanting to go to bed at 8pm and expecting silence and darkness in the whole house.

This morning he announced he felt 'worse than ever', so I suggested he went to our local walk in out of hours clinic. He wouldn't go, wouldn't take any painkillers, and has just been moody and rude all day.

Again, I know he can't help being ill but after his two holidays I was hoping for a day or two where he'd perhaps take care of the DC and do a few household chores to give me a break. Also if I am ill he won't even acknowledge it and I'm expected to carry on.

AIBU to be annoyed?

@TheTeenageYears Give him food he can cope with at appropriate intervals and make sure he has enough liquids

Why should she do any of that when he doesn't even acknowledge she's ill?

Fuck him. I'd buy the kids lots of musical instruments and flashy light up toys. I'd make sure there was no soup in the house either. 2 can play selfish buggers.

Are you certain it's tonsillitis and not the kissing disease? I cant remember it's proper name

I get tonsillitis quite a lot (well not for years, but regularly again now I’m exposed to kiddie germs!!)
Guess what! I just have to carry on!
Had it when DS was 5 months old, was hallucinating....no bed rest for me!!

YANBU what about all the cash he has spent on those two weeks? Also I assume he won't have much annual leave left to take DC away anywhere?
He does sound poorly but needs painkillers and another trip back to GP.

That would give me the rage and I'd have no sympathy whatsoever.

He sounds awful. Does he bring anything to the relationship?

Having had some experience of living with this sort of behaviour, feeling ill, refusal of painkillers or doctors, I would consider the possibility of drug/alcohol abuse. Life is fine until they have to stop, either because it is financially impossible to carry on or they have realised it has gone too far to live normally.

@LGY1, yep same here.
I had a two months breastfed baby, it was one of the hottest day of the year and I coudn’t swallow a thing as it was so painful.
Guess what, I still looked after ds 100%, got up during the night etc....

Ignore the man child.
If he won’t help himself then why should you bother .
I’d tell him to piss off into the bedroom and bloody stay there

Worst pain ever and totally knocks you out.
I’ve had it many, many times, hasn’t been too bad.

Are you certain it's tonsillitis and not the kissing disease?
Glandular fever. Except tonsillitis is also transmitted by kissing. I’d be asking questions.

When I've had bacterial tonsillitis it was awful, terrible pain and complete lack of energy (I did manage to get out of bed as I was moving house and had no choice but massive struggle). However I definitely used pain killers (alternating between paracetamol & codeine and ibuprofen & codeine at one point). That said once I started antibiotics it improved very quickly are you sure it's tonsilitis?

Either way I'd struggle to sympathise at all as he's being a big baby and refusing to help himself.

What is it about men that make them bloody martyrs!!

Mine's been the same this weekend, but I ignored him and took him on my day out anyway.. keep hydrated, take your pain relief and tissues, and get on with it like the rest of us have to.

Glandular fever doesn't have to be transmitted by kissing. I know, I had it last year while Very Definitely Single. Likely caught it because I work with the general public.

I don’t understand why you are even interacting with him and trying to get him to take painkillers, “making” him go to the doctor, suggesting he goes to the walk-in clinic etc. Why are you wasting head space on him when he clearly doesn’t give a shiny shit about you and your child? I bet you’ve been running around making him drinks, fetching his tablets, fluffing his pillows and generally playing nursemaid too haven’t you? Just stop it. He’s a selfish, self centred cockwomble and if I were you I’d be making plans to leave. He won’t have so much money for his lads holidays when he’s got child support to pay! Wanker.