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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not the happiest of pregnant people

103 replies

UsedUpUsername · 16/02/2020 07:21

So Kate Middleton is using a phrase I thought was rather a joke: She mentioned in a recent podcast that she was ‘not the happiest of pregnant people’

IABU to be annoyed that she’s using such an awkward and politically charged phrase?

(IABU in caring about this, but whilst the royals are shoved in our faces, I feel entitled to complain)

OP posts:
ArriettyJones · 16/02/2020 07:23

Can you explain a bit more what you mean?

Toastytoes1 · 16/02/2020 07:24

What is it that offends you exactly? I think a lot of people who suffer HG, myself included, relate to this phrase. I was thrilled to discover I was pregnant, I adore my baby and cannot wait to meet them but when you feel so utterly rotten you do struggle to remain happy at a time where everyone expects you to be happy. Thats what I took her to mean, I don’t particularly get whats so offensive or ‘politically charged’ about it.

Igotthemheavyboobs · 16/02/2020 07:24

Why is this an awkward and politically charged phrase?

I have had full meltdowns this pregnancy, could totally imagine using this phrase, she is just telling the truth. Was she not hospitalised during all her pgs as well?

Popskipiekin · 16/02/2020 07:25

... Would you have rather she said “pregnant women”, is that it? Confused

THNG5 · 16/02/2020 07:26

I don't understand where you're coming from. How is it awkward and how is it politically charged? I'm pregnant at the moment and I'm definitely not the happiest of pregnant people!

AriadnesFilament · 16/02/2020 07:26

What are you talking about?! Does everything have to have subtext and hidden meaning?
She had HG, she was going for british self-deprecating understatement to describe how she felt while suffering with it. 1) how is that difficult to grasp? 2) how is that awkward and politically charged?
FGS

ArriettyJones · 16/02/2020 07:27

For example, I’ve known friends abusive marriages while pregnant and end up homeless or semi-homeless, so I can see to some it might seem a bit insensitive. Similarly some women have to make diff icy boiled after amniocentesis etc.

OTOH if you feel ill, it is miserable and she probably is trying to seem relatable.

But I don’t know what you mean by “politically charged” and I haven’t heard the podcast.

Original poster
UsedUpUsername · 16/02/2020 07:27

Would you have rather she said “pregnant women”, is that it?

Yes. I always thought that pregnant people was kind of fringe, but if KM is using it, then it’s more mainstream than I thought.

People are not pregnant. Women are imho

OP posts:
ArriettyJones · 16/02/2020 07:29

Oh. I doubt it was TRA type statement. She does not strike me as likely to be into trans rights. Just an awkward phrasing.

Afterthestorm65 · 16/02/2020 07:30

I thought exactly the same - was she told to say “pregnant people” rather than “pregnant women”.

Original poster
UsedUpUsername · 16/02/2020 07:30

How is it awkward and how is it politically charged?

There is a movement to be more inclusive in language and use pregnant people, to recognise that men, too, can become pregnant.

OP posts:
AriadnesFilament · 16/02/2020 07:30

I’m the least ‘politically charged’ person ever in this arena; I’ve used the phrase pregnant person in relation to myself because I am, guess what, a person.
You’re reading far too much into it.

ArriettyJones · 16/02/2020 07:31

What about the rest of the podcast? Was she otherwise referring to mothers and women in the normal way?

Ponoka7 · 16/02/2020 07:32

People don't get pregnant, women do.

Within the Trans movement there's a push for gender neutral terminology, especially during maternity related stuff and even female cancers.

Have none of you seen the articles that state "men can get pregnant/give birth"?

During the last women's conference etc there were sections of male-to-female trans people, who were asking for no discussions about reproductive or medical female issues.

ArriettyJones · 16/02/2020 07:34

(Unless it is something she has picked up hanging out with midwives’ organisations recently? She has been doing stuff like that. You have me worried now! The last thing we need is the royals going all TRA.)

MindyStClaire · 16/02/2020 07:34

A) it's a normal phrase to use, and always has been.

B) maybe with all her work on mental health and supporting LGBT people she supports trans rights.

Neither of these are bad things.

kittlesticks · 16/02/2020 07:35

I think it was just an awkward turn of phrase seeing as she didn't say anything else of that nature. She acknowledged that women give birth etc. She talked about mum guilt. I think she did a decent job.

Original poster
UsedUpUsername · 16/02/2020 07:36

I thought exactly the same - was she told to say “pregnant people” rather than “pregnant women”

I’m guessing so. These things are scripted within an inch of their life. No royal is speaking without their text being looked over with a fine-tooth comb by their PR team.

I’ve worked with non-UK royals (well, their people) and we always have to do loads of back and forths with their office for every little detail.

That’s why I think it’s intentional.

OP posts:
Toastytoes1 · 16/02/2020 07:36

@UsedUpUsername well you could have been a bit clearer in what it was you’re annoyed about.
Yes you are still being unreasonable though. One, because I don’t actually think thats what she meant, she was talking about herself and just used the word people in place of women without putting as much thought into it as you clearly have. Two, even if she did deliberately say people instead of women, who cares? No one is denying that women exist or men exist but there are people in our society who do not identify as the gender they were born with and choose to change... how does this affect your life in any way shape or form? It doesn’t, so why do you care if just occasionally, someone says that a person is pregnant rather than a woman is pregnant if in an individual case, that person does not choose to identify themselves as a woman?

lettersbyowl · 16/02/2020 07:37

I think you're being OTT. Listen to the podcast. She refers to women, mothers and mums throughout. I thought it was a nice episode. Not everything needs to become a statement on trans issues.

Ginfordinner · 16/02/2020 07:39

You are massively overthinking it.

trixiebelden77 · 16/02/2020 07:43

I don’t think it will have been deliberate to be honest.

Although astonished that there are people who are unaware of the controversy around using people instead of women in circumstances like this. No idea what the incredulity and guffawing is about - very ill-informed posters I assume.

Igotthemheavyboobs · 16/02/2020 07:45

There is a movement to be more inclusive in language and use pregnant people, to recognise that men, too, can become pregnant

Right, but if that's what she was doing, she did a shit job bu then continuing to talk about women and mothers eh?

Sandsnake · 16/02/2020 07:46

I’m fairly gender critical and referred to myself as a pregnant person a lot during my recent pregnancy. Not sure why, just what I did. Certainly not political!

Longtalljosie · 16/02/2020 07:46

I wondered, but she’s inserting an adjective into a well-known phrase - “not the happiest of people”. I think it’s just coincidence on this occasion