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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it’s weird to call your kid your valentine?

55 replies

1second · 14/02/2020 20:33

Getting DP a card in Clinton’s today & they had valentines cards ‘to daddy’... I'm sure there were mummy ones too I didn’t look.

Also seen friends on social media calling there kids their valentine.

I dunno, is it weird? Obviously I love my kids, more than anyone... but isn’t Valentine’s Day a romantic love thing? I don’t remember noticing this before!!

& yes people can do what they want, no I’m not effected by it. Yes I have bigger problems 😂

But as a general observation, AIBU?

OP posts:
Alsohuman · 14/02/2020 21:03

I love Galentines’ Day on the 13th, it’s a really nice way to honour the women you love.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 14/02/2020 21:05

I sent my DP a card from our cat. As a child I always got a card from my dad, then as a teen I realised he was the “secret admirer” that I struggled to figure out!

bookmum08 · 14/02/2020 21:05

Sigh.
How many of these threads must we have?
Valentine's Day has evolved and changed for 100s of years. Celebrate it. Don't celebrate it. Make it about romantic love. Make it about non romantic love. Make it about friendship.
Just do what you want. Non of it is compulsory.

Pardonwhat · 14/02/2020 21:07

It’s about love.
Why not celebrate it in all forms?

Babybel90 · 14/02/2020 21:11

I’ve always understood it to be about romantic love and find adults giving kids (or vice versa) a bit weird and creepy, I wouldn’t do it myself.

However obviously other people see it differently and some people just love any excuse to send a card and celebrate something 🤷‍♀️

GlendaSugarbeanIsJudgingYou · 14/02/2020 21:11

DS2 made me a card in school and I adore it.

Whether you like it or not Valentine is about more than just romantic love nowadays.

If it makes people smile on what would have been another wet and windy Friday then what's the harm?

DelurkingAJ · 14/02/2020 21:13

In the US this is standard. So my American DM has always and still (39 years and counting) gives me a card.

It was fab at school when very uncool me could always say with complete truth that I had received a card!

Lozz22 · 14/02/2020 21:14

Me and my Other Half both sent our Valentine's Day wishes to each other and to our Babies in heaven

FudgeBrownie2019 · 14/02/2020 21:15

Ah there are worse things to do than giving children, cats and dogs valentines cards.

One woman I know calls her DS (who is 14) her soul mate. That's far more odd.

Smidge001 · 14/02/2020 21:16

I totally think valentines is about romantic love, so completely agree with you that involving a child is totally weird.

InTheTempest · 14/02/2020 21:19

My 7 yr old DD made me a card as a surprise, it's honestly the best valentines I've ever received.

My mum told me she'd wanted to do it over a week ago. That she thought to do something nice for me like that keeps me going despite life being grim at the moment.

Children like any reason to celebrate something, it's lovely imo.

amaryl · 14/02/2020 21:24

I agree it’s about romantic love.
Until I went to the movies tonight and they gave us a heart shaped chocolate tin and my 12yr old ds said ‘mum will you be my valentine’

Original poster
1second · 14/02/2020 21:24

@GlendaSugarbeanIsJudgingYou

If it makes people smile on what would have been another wet and windy Friday then what's the harm?

You’re right Smile I feel like my cynical opinion is being changed.

Maybe my DDs will get heart shaped pancakes next year too Grin

@Lozz22 😞Flowers

OP posts:
Original poster
1second · 14/02/2020 21:24

I think m&s is my valentine after that £20 meal
Deal 🤤

OP posts:
Sparklesocks · 14/02/2020 21:27

@EdithWeston I’m not sure I agree, it hasn’t stayed the same for centuries exactly - unless they were all queuing up in the card factory in the dark ages!

And Mother’s Day is very specifically about mothers, so I don’t believe it’s comparable to Valentine’s Day which can be a bit more broad as love can take a number of forms.

Yabadee · 14/02/2020 21:34

My DD4 asked me last week what Valentine’s Day was. I was driving at the time so told her vaguely it was a day for telling people you love them, and you might want to make them a card or get flowers etc. She said, that’s lovely I can make my granny a card. So I just thought why the hell not.

Of course, she left the card she made at nursery and I had to take her to Tesco to buy one. She got one that said ‘if I tell you I love you can I keep you forever?’ My mums reaction was totally worth it :)

In the horrible world we live in just now, I’d say any kind of love is worth celebrating

Lifeisabeach09 · 14/02/2020 21:40

My DD (9) gave me a rose (that she took from a bouquet of flowers at my sister's!) Grin I loved it nonetheless (then told her to put it back!)
I used to make cards for my mum as a child.

Valentine's Day has evolved to include non-romantic as well as romantic love.

gamerwidow · 14/02/2020 21:44

My DH came home with flowers for me and for DD. My DD made me and DH cards at her childminders this week. We all love each other just not romantically. Valentine's day can mean what ever you want it to mean, its only creepy if people make it that way.

ddraigygoch · 14/02/2020 21:48

YABU.
My DS told my DH that I was the girl he wanted to be his valentine 😭 Because I'm the girl he loves the most.

funinthesun19 · 14/02/2020 22:12

A few years ago I would have agreed with you as I used to see Valentines Day as celebrating romantic love.
Now I just see it as celebrating love in general.

My children all gave me a card where they could draw a picture on the front. I think they’re adorable.

Mummadeeze · 14/02/2020 22:19

My DD and I didn’t swap cards but we got a takeaway and watched a movie together as a treat. It is nice to still feel loved and appreciated on Valentines Day when you don’t have a significant other in your life. Have spent many years feeling a bit left out, but was happy tonight so what is the harm?

Bluntness100 · 14/02/2020 22:24

She thanked me but gently explained that valentines was for couples and I’d misunderstood

That's very sad.

I'm surprised that some people think there are hard rules around valentines that must be obeyed. In fact I find it a bit odd that anyone would take it so seriously they think there are rules to be obeyed.,

partysong · 14/02/2020 22:26

Meh, it's all made us nonsense anyway isn't it? So what difference does it make who you direct it to?

got my first Valentine's Day card from DS today. Actually nearly cried

TrueFriendsStabYouInTheFront · 14/02/2020 22:32

Aw I just think it's a day of love! I got my 4 & 5 yo DDs a card which they loved

ddraigygoch · 14/02/2020 22:34

@partysong I had to take deep breaths while hugging DS after he gave me my card with a big smile on his face. It's ruined me all day.

Until somebody shows me proof that today must only be about romantic shagging love I don't give a shit.