To go away 2.5 weeks before I'm due to give birth

[placecalledvertigo]

DH and I have been invited to stay with my sister and her DH over the Easter weekend in April. We live in London and they're based on the edge of a town that's between 1.5 and 2 hours drive from us.

My BIL has offered to collect us from our house on the bank holiday Friday and drive us back to London on the Monday, as he'll be going that way anyway.

However, I'm 28 weeks pregnant with my first (due 30th April) and am wondering if it's a good idea to go away so close to the due date?

There is a hospital in my sister's town but I've never actually been there, and my sister/BIL have said they totally understand if I can't make it because of the pregnancy.

I probably sound really precious, but am new to this pregnancy lark and don't know how I'll be feeling by that stage or what's best!

Any advice?

I would

As it is in the UK I would say no problem to go (abroad would be a different matter).
If it is only 2 hours away and given that most first labours take forever you would almost certainly have time to get back to your own hospital if that was important to you.

It's fine , just take notes with you.

If you did go into labour whilst visiting, how would you get home? Would BIL drive you the 2hrs back to drop you off, then another 2hrs back to the rest of his holiday? Do you have your own car so you have the independence if you need to leave early without being dependent on BIL?

If you have a support network in the town you're going to then it's not so bad. My children were 3 weeks, 6 weeks and 3 weeks early, so I'd make sure you were fully prepared just in case. I would have hated being away from my support network.

I would also want to make sure that there was always someone available to get you home if you need to, so that would mean someone with a car not being able to drink, so you do need to think about that if your bil is driving you.

I think it depends on the pregnancy. 2 weeks before I was due I was being monitored daily due to reduced movements and couldn't have been far from home at all. If everything is going well then it shouldn't be an issue.

I went away for the weekend 10 says before my due date because there was a special event I didn't want to miss and felt it was worth the risk. I brought my notes and hospital bag with me, contacted the local hospital and found out what my birthing options would be (eg midwife led centre or labour ward). I wasn't that fixed on my local hospital and it wouldn't have been the end of the world if I had to give birth while away.
In the end I have birth on my due date back in our local hospital.

But you might not be comfortable with that, and that's ok. You're allowed to be precious when it comes to giving birth, it's about your body, and your choices.

Think also about the drive itself - I hate long drives in the third trimester, so consider how to make it comfortable and safe.

It sounds like this isn't a rare special event that you really need to go to. Maybe you could let them know nearer the time? See how you feel in the final weeks, you might be totally up for it, or you may have lower back pain and be unable to drive more than 15 mins. It's hard to predict and you shouldn't force yourself into anything.

I wouldn’t, you’ll be huge, hormonal, tired, comfortable sitting in the car for long periods, not want to eat much due to being huge and having indigestion.

I’d do another weekend in early march if you can.

I wouldn't go anywhere after 37 weeks. My waters broke at 37 weeks on the dot.

Only if you’re ok about having the baby there. Also to be honest I’m 37 weeks and all I want to do is veg on the sofa so visiting people wouldn’t be top of my list of things to do

I don't think there's anything wrong with it, but personally I wouldn't.

Congratulations on your pregnancy OP!

Could you say maybe for now and make a decision nearer the time? You'll get all sorts of responses on here ranging from "I climbed Mount Everest the day before my due date, it's pregnancy not an illness, just take your notes with you" and "I was bedbound by 30 weeks, don't commit to anything" - but you won't really know until you will feel until you get to that point.

Also my waters went at 34+5 and I gave birth that day so I'm biased...

Of course it in the U.K. I'd defo go.

I wouldn't. But then, i had dd at 37+2, so i class anything as post 37 weeks as possible birth time (i felt very overdue when ds didn't arrive until 41 weeks!)
It's totally your call though, everyone feels differently about these things

Just go, the NHS will be taking care of you wherever you are, that’s the lovely thing about the NHS!

Had my baby at 32 weeks. Absolutely out of the blue. No previous problems. I wouldn’t go anywhere if it could be avoided, you never know what can happen. Also the whole ‘take your notes and it’ll be fine’ - sure and if the baby has a NICU stay? Be prepared to move there for the duration.

Put your baby first!

Do it - but take your notes, hospital bag and car seat. I visited family 4 hours away for Christmas and gave birth on the 27th Dec (was due 13th jan!) in their local hospital rather than where I had planned

Expect the unexpected!

I went 4 hours north at 38 weeks pregnant for my SILs wedding. Took my notes, hospital bag and car seat just incase. Didn't need them.

See how you feel nearer the time.

For me the main thing would be the sheer discomfort of a 2 hour car journey at 37 weeks. Everyone is different though - it sounds like your sister/BIL are reasonably understanding so you might prefer to just see how you feel closer to the time.

I'm sure others will say I'm being ott but current recommendations seem to be that newborns shouldn't spend more than 30 mins per day in a car seat, and the difficulties around possibly getting home again with the baby would put me off. I also had a c section though.

I wouldn't if it was abroad, but otherwise fine. Mine have been born at 41 weeks, 40 weeks, 37 weeks and 36 weeks.

With the 37 weeks one I was actually planning to go away to France for Christmas and New Year but my consultant talked me out of it. Good thing too, as he was born on New Year's Eve!

If you are healthy and take your notes and hospital bag just in case then fine. BUT the traffic is likely to be dreadful on both days so you may end up enduring some much longer journeys than you are anticipating.

you’ll be huge, hormonal, tired, comfortable sitting in the car for long periods, not want to eat much due to being huge and having indigestion

I was commuting to work an 1h 45mins drive from home until 37 weeks - none of the above applied to me.
As others have said its hard to say how you will feel - if you can make up your mind closer to the time then leave a decision until a few days before if you need to commit now I would probably decline. The one potential hitch for me would be relying on BiL driving - if you need to get home/to hospital or just want to leave early what would happen? is there an option for you/your partner to drive? That way you can head home if anything starts to happen.

Mine was born at 36 weeks. I would plan to go but also plan for the unexpected.

I'm sure others will say I'm being ott but current recommendations seem to be that newborns shouldn't spend more than 30 mins per day in a car seat, and the difficulties around possibly getting home again with the baby would put me off.

That’s a good point! So if the baby did come I suppose we’d have to take the train home?

As everyone else says, are you happy if you give birth in that town, in a hospital you've never been to? Would you be happy if you have to stay in that hospital for a few nights? Does that hospital have all the facilities that a London hospital would have if something goes wrong (assuming you are in London)? Will you be happy to do the two hour drive home with a baby a couple of days old?

For me, answer to all those Qs would have been no. So I wouldn't do it. But then both my DCs were born at 35 weeks and had to say in hospital for over a week after birth.