Grammar correction. Arrrggghhh!

[Brightonhome]

I sent a text to a slightly older relative saying that I had bought something 'off Amazon', and she replies with the very first line "It should read off of .... tut tut" Whether she is correct or not, it really pissed me off. I'm fifty-five, not twelve.
We have a slightly strained relationship anyway, and we hadn't spoken for two months, so to criticise me like that, well, I was not happy. In the same text, she also called me 'young lady' when admonishing me for not getting in touch earlier, but she could just as easily have contacted me in that time frame. I'm ashamed to say I sent a text back saying "Who the hell says 'off of'? No grammar nazis allowed here." Yes I definitely overreacted, but I wouldn't dream of correcting someone's grammar, unless it was a stranger who was correcting someone else's, but in the process, made errors themselves ..... they're fair game. I may see an inconsistency, but to point it out to an adult friend or relative is just plain rude if you ask me. I think I should probably apologise for the nazi comment, but I can't bring myself to do it. Ugh.
What are your feelings about grammar correction among adult friends and relatives? helpful, but mildly annoying? or passive aggressive BS?

*Hello meuca!

I'm my view you're not up to engaging in this debate. I'm off to bed :p

xx*

I've been an English language teacher for 10 years, so I'm sure your passive-aggressive undertone was as unintentional as your typo of "I'm".

If you do feel like dropping in again, I'd be intrigued to learn your definition of a phrasal verb. Goodnight!

(Apologies for the failure with bold!)

I think you may have missed my sarcastic conjunction of prepositions. Why not join me in the throwing off of your grammatical inhibitions

Do you mean your use of "to be up to"? That's not a phrasal verb, I'm afraid (it's an idiom) - and nor is "the throwing off of" (it's a gerund phrase).

I would recommend looking up the construction of "verb + off of" in any reputable guide. You'll probably see that it's not an egregious error, but it's redundant, and certainly never more correct than "verb + off". I would be generally interested in any findings to the contrary.

Incidentally, I don't really bother with correcting people's grammar unless I'm at work, as I think it's rarely done with good intentions. I make exceptions for people who erroneously correct others, though.

(and for the misuse of "whom", "myself" and "and I" by people trying to show off, but that's a rant for another day!)

Hello Meuca, sorry, I was just being a bit arsey, and not fully engaging with the finer points of your helpful posts. But "off of" is clearly a correct construction, as demonstrated. And you do know that Shakespeare is on my side when it comes to phrasal verbs taking prepositions? If I hadn't had the last gin I'd start quoting him

My googling is better than I thought!

Winchester. What, art thou lame?
Simpcox. Ay, God Almighty help me!
Earl of Suffolk. How camest thou so?
Simpcox. A fall off of a tree.

Henry VI pt II, act 2 scene 1

And I am definitely off bed

Goodnight!

I'm studying English lit and language at the minute. I like to think I'm quite well educated in grammar. But the English language is so hard to learn. I make mistakes and use shortcuts in text messages/social media. I see mistakes as well. I don't say anything. It's rude to correct someone's grammar/spelling. Also there is auto correct that can make you look wrong. The only thing that really annoys me is people using "I" instead of "me" to look clever and its wrong. Live and let live!

Everytime I receive a text from son's dad it triggers me, I don't correct him but it genuinely takes me about 10 times to read whatever the arrogant ass has to say, called himself a "farther" today and although the text was supposed to piss me off I laughed for about 10 minutes and couldn't reply to his stupidity. Still wouldn't correct him though as much as I would love to.

Your all wrong.

Any divvy nose its offf off of.

FROM !

How rude of her to correct you. I particularly don’t like the ‘tut tut’ and the ‘young lady’ is outrageous. All exacerbated by the fact you had contacted her in a period of little contact.

It’s so funny that her ‘correction’ of you was itself incorrect. Off of is perfectly fine when used to describe physical action (although some prefer a simple ‘off the bus’) Not fine when used to describe the passing of something from one to another.

Oh bloody hell i became sucked in to a tedious po-faced diatribe there !

There is no way of correcting grammar with an English as first language person, in everyday life/informal conversations etc without it seeming patronising and condescending I think.

As for less/fewer and me/myself - bloody hell it drives me up the wall when those are misused. I say nothing nor do I judge but I seethe.

You're just too good to be true
can't take my eyes off of you
(sorry, couldn't resist quoting the song)

I'm American, so grammar rules probably vary. Here, we'd say that we bought something "on Amazon". You could theoretically say "off", but everyone here says "on" when referring to doing anything on a website. "Where did you get it?" "On/from/[no preposition] Amazon" is what I'd expect to hear. Sorry if this information isn't valuable since you're likely from the UK.

According to the Oxford Learners' Dictionary 'off a website' is fine (if colloquial), and 'off of' is 'non-standard, N American and informal'. So unless you're in the US I'd say you're more correct and would send her this photo to prove it.

And now I'm going to be stuck all day with a Eurovision earworm!

Get off of the bus

Forget of about us

Put the blame of on me ...

Pom pop if you need alternative how about -

I can’t get you off of my mind - Bob Dylan

Get off of my cloud - Rolling Stones

?

That would piss me off too. Even more so given that she is incorrect. Grammar aside, she sounds a bit smug and patronising from what you have said. If you aren't getting on so well anyway then maybe it's time to gracefully drift apart.

Maybe someone already posted this and I missed it but it's pretty clear.

The use of off of as a preposition is now considered tautological or incorrect by some usage guides and is not suitable for formal or business use. Off of can be replaced with on, from or off

That was from Wiktionary which did also say it was fine as a phrase in the 15th C.

NearlyGranny I fear you have confused the words antiquated and obsolete.

I feel very strongly about anyone friends or family showing themselves up by correcting other people's grammar. I try to keep these feelings to myself, to avoid giving them the satisfaction.

The most I would say would be the old standby 'thank you for sharing that with me' and then ignore.

I would tend to avoid having anything to do with them. Is there any reason why you cannot just ignore then?

Don't see why the Americans are getting stick for this "off of" abomination - MIL says it all the time and she's never set foot in the States.

"What did you get for your birthday off of Auntie Sue"? FROM. Not "off of".

It is fantastically annoying !

Hey @ProclivitiesMcManus, thanks for the apology - and sorry to you if I was a bit of a dick in my replies! Genuinely, I find this quite interesting, and I have been thinking about it a little bit, because it is the kind of discussion that could theoretically arise in my job.

This is a little bit self-indulgent, but in counter to your Shakespeare example, I would offer the following:

^Winchester. What, art thou lame?
Simpcox. Ay, God Almighty help me!
Earl of Suffolk. How camest thou so?
Simpcox. A fall off of a tree.

Henry VI pt II, act 2 scene 1^

1. Shakespeare, although a great writer, isn't necessarily a source of great grammar. His focus was often on the poetry of language. Take, for example, the quote the most unkindest cut of all. Can we use that to justify "most + superlative", or should we chalk it up to poetic licence?

2. Perhaps more importantly, we don't use Shakespearean language nowadays. If one of my students asked me, as in your quote above, "How camest thou so?" I would have to correct them, because 400 years after the fact, they're unlikely to pass their exams speaking that way (I would also be pretty bloody surprised...).

3. Finally, to be a little bit pedantic, this is still not an example of "verb + off + of", because fall here is a noun. Yes, this is nitpicking, but if you can't be a shameless pedant on a grammar thread, when can you?
   I'll say again that personally, I don't get as angry about "off of" as other people in this thread (maybe because it's something I don't often encounter in my daily life; native English speakers say it, but non-natives don't). I would take the view expressed here: grammarist.com/usage/off-of/ - it's unnecessary, but it's not a crime against nature. Nevertheless, someone correcting "off" to "off of" is wrong, and it is never more correct (or as Shakespeare may have put it, more correcter) to choose "off of" over "off".

TLDR: the OP's family member was being a dick.