To absolutely hate this comment when you share a photo of yourself with a child or child a baby etc

[Vilanelle]

"Suits you"
Well I mean, I'd be highly offended if someone said "ohh that doesn't suit you at all, you should never hold a child again".

And yes, I know it's completely trivial but i have the same woman commenting this to me all the time. I am pregnant at the moment but she used to say it before this. Is this another way to say "it suits you, why don't you have a child yet?"

Think I'm grumpy. Any coffee going?

Also title should read HOLD a baby, not child a baby lol

Yep, that’s a bit passive aggressive, I’d take it the same way.

Maybe don’t share photos and then no one will comment anything?

i have never interpreted this is a negative or passive aggressive way. Aren’t they just succinctly saying - “You look very happy and natural with a baby. I hope that, should it be something you want for your life, you are fortunate enough to experience the joy of being a parent for yourself”?

She’s just making conversation I think. Maybe don’t share photos of you don’t want people to comment

Grim. People never say this to men. I would want to hold every baby at arms length in future photos, making an exaggerated “EUUUURGGH” face.

Maybe don’t share photos and then no one will comment anything

Oh ok, this seems like a reasonable solution to the problem. Shall I also ensure I don't hold a child in front of people.

I'm not offended, it just annoys me

One of my friends in particular, has a really bad habit of deciding and voicing the opinion of whether people would suit having a boy or a girl 🙄. Drives me insane. She will say things like nah, I don't think you would suit having a boy. As though children are some accessory to match your clothes. It's really weird.

Anyone else read this and get Fast Show flashbacks?
I’ll get me coat.

This has never happened to me in all my 54 years but then I can't think of any times I put photos of myself holding other people's babies on social media. I didn't even bore people with photos of my own, let alone randoms.
If one of my acquaintances was putting pics of herself holding babies I might think "oh she clearly likes kids, perhaps I'd better make a friendly comment"

That was my first thought @OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow.

I don't think you should get wound up by it, people are just commenting which presumably when you post a pic on SM is what you want?

Someone put on my friend's FB post of her holding a baby 'it suits you, you should get one' and she just replied 'I am happy just to borrow one'. No drama.

Thing is …… you're sharing photos and then trying to police others' (doubtless well meaning) comments. The pictures, thanks to the wonders of social media, reach a wide audience. You're not gonna guarantee that every comment will suit you to the ground.

Have that coffee. Have another. Put your feet up and sit out the rainy weather. Enjoy your day

People do say this to men too. When we were battling infertility DH got the brunt of the ‘suits you’ ‘Chotte Papa’ type comments (another way of saying Uncle / dad’s little brother, but not the nicest thing to hear when you are going through ivf)

Presumably you want people to comment as you're sharing the photos.
What do you want them to say?

Well I'm sure the OP doesn't want people deciding whether she suits holding a baby or not

Me too Fuckery Oooh

I am glad I am not on FB, there seem to be complicated rules. If you post a picture people will comment. If you are going through IVF or struggling to conceive and people don't know, then if you post a pic of yourself with a baby they will comment.
If you don't want that, don't post the pic. Keep it for your private album.

Maybe my family are unusual but they don't just say it to women. They say it to men too. It's just one of those standard responses to someone holding a baby (assuming the baby isn't screaming with terror and trying to get away from whoever is holding them).

oh gosh, some people think having a baby is a wonderful thing, and some people love babies (god knows why, but they do)

It just means you look happy or something, and they wish it for you.

Nothing passive aggressive, they are just being nice. I can't understand that blind adoration for babies, but just chill out.

Yes hate it and people who say it have no idea. I remember crying all the way home from my nephews First birthday party and people kept saying this. What I had not shared with them is that I had been to the doctors the day before and told I needed to go on a waiting list for a fertility clinics as I had not got pregnant after 4 yrs of trying.

People never say this to men.

Yes they do.

I've never taken it to be anything more than a passing comment - neither negative or positive. When I was TTC and had had difficulties I was a little more emotionally involved about it, but as people didn't know the background, still took it as just a general comment and just one of those things people, often older, say.

It's just a joke. It means you look cute holding a baby, like it's natural to you. It's not passive aggressive at all.

Genuine question for the OP.
What do you want people to say?
If you get wound up over people who are presumably close to you- (or you wouldn't be showing them personal photographs would you? ) making conversational pleasantries about said photo...what are you going to be like when they scroll on by when it's you holding your own baby?

PS get yourself ready for when people ask you if your baby is "good" or "does s/he sleep?" You'll love the offence you can imagine at that stage.

And yes people absolutely do say this to men.

She's trying to be nice, for God's sake. Why do people insist on taking offence at every tiny thing other people do? What she means is: You look like you'd make a lovely mum. That's a kind thing to say. There's enough bitchery in the world without finding fault with well-wishers.